Thirty Four

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🌵Andy🌵

I had no idea what to think when I saw her arms. All I wanted to do was pull her to my chest and never let her go.

I'm so mad at Rye for saying something that would make my princess do that to herself. She isn't anything that he said. She the definition of perfection.

I'm currently holding my princess in my arms whilst she has her head on my chest. We're in her bed because she claimed that she was tired.

"Are you okay now love?" I asked her, sort of afraid of the answer that I might get.

"Yes, Andy. I'm okay now. Thank you." She smiles up at me. I can tell it's fake.

"Are you sure?" I asked.

She sighs. "His words really hurt. Honestly, I don't know how I'm ever going to be able to face him. But yes, at the moment, I'm okay."

I nod and kiss her forehead. "You don't have to even look at him until you're ready to talk to him. I love you."

"I love you too." She says with a small smile. "Are the boys still here?"

"I think so. I'll text Mikey to see if they are if you want. Why do you ask?" I ask.

"I wanna tell them something." She replies. She looks down at her arm that's covered by my hoodie that she put on. I instantly know what she wants to tell them.

"Okay. I'll text Mikey."

Me: Are you guys still here? Lilac wants to tell y'all something.

Mikey👾: Yeah, we're downstairs.

Me: Okay. We'll be down soon.

"They're still here. They're downstairs." I informed her.

She nodded and got up. "Let's go."

We walk downstairs and to the living room where Mikey, Jack, and Brooklyn are.

🌸Lilac🌸

"I need to tell you all something. The reason why I ran to the bathroom." I said.

Mikey, Brook, and Jack all nod. I sit down beside Andy on a different sofa than them and take a deep breath to calm my nerves.

"I cut." I said. I look down, scared of their reaction.

"Lilac, show us your arm." Brooklyn says calmly.

I roll up my sleeve and show them as tears began to blur my vision. But I won't cry. I can't right now.

I hear the boys get up and walk towards me. Jack sits beside me and rubs my back whilst Brooklyn and Mikey sit on their knees in front of me. I can see tears in both Brooklyn and Mikey's eyes as they look up at me.

Brooklyn gently grabs my arm and runs his thumb gently over my scars and fresh cuts. Then I see a tear being released from his eye and it falls on my arm.

I feel Jack hug me and I hear him sniffle. It breaks my heart that I'm the reason the boys are like this.

Mikey puts him forehead on my knee and I hear a quiet sob coming from his lips.

I look at Andy and see that he also has tears in his eyes. He gives me a weak smile and kisses my cheek.

"It's okay love." Andy whispers in my ear.

"W-Why?" Mikey stutters.

I shrug. "It's the only way to get rid of the pain. When I can't take it anymore I cut to calm myself down. The physical pain masks the emotional pain."

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