Addicted To You // Andy Fowler (Complete)

Eight

🌸Lilac🌸

I'm at work now. I'm trying not to think of what the boys said. I knew at some point I would stop fighting it and I would just think about it. I'm scared for that moment.

"Lilac, you can go now." Liza said.

I nodded. "T-Thank y-you."

I grabbed my stuff and walked out the door.

****

When I got home I was met with silence. Prim went out to her friend's house, so I'm stuck alone...

I sat on the sofa and stared of into space. Then it came to me and hit me like a rock.

Eight months. Eight fucking months! Eight months without Andy. What am I gonna do?

🌵Andy🌵

It's tearing me apart. I can't see Lilac. I won't see her for eight months. How am I supposed to deal with that?

Rye was staring at me from his bunk with a concerned look. He knows how much I hate not being able to see her. I send a glare back to him. He was the one who suggested that we should all just stay at the flat tonight. He's the one who did this.

You know what? I'm not even going to lie. I love her. I love Lilac Woods.

I can't take it anymore. I jumped off my bed and put some clothes on.

"What are you doing?" Rye asked.

"I need to see her. I don't care, get me in trouble." I say and rushed out the door.

🌸Lilac🌸

All these thoughts are killing me. Why can't they just go away? There was a voice in my head that kept saying all these horrible things.

Andy will forget about you. He won't want to be around you once he gets back. You know why? Because you're nothing. You. Are. Nothing.

I covered my ears, almost hoping it was a real voice so I could block it out. Sobs left my lips and more tears left my eyes.

What if Andy does forget about me?

He will. You mean nothing to him. He just needs an excuse to get away from you. Then he'll get back and act as if he never saved you. You know why? Because he hates you.

I bring my knees up to my chest and rock myself back and forth. My sobs are the only sound in the house.

Then I hear a knock at the door. I reluctantly get up and go to the door to answer it. I open it and just like I hoped, it's Andy.

He was looking down, so he didn't notice my tear stained face. "Hey love."

Then he looked up. He saw how I looked and I could see concern and sadness in his eyes.

I let him in and close the door. Then another wave of tears came.

"Hey. Shhh. It's okay." Andy says. He pulls me into a hug whilst I cry into his chest. He runs his fingers through my hair and keeps whispering that it's okay and he's here.

Soon I calm down and look at him.

"I thought Rye said you couldn't." I say.

"I don't care what Rye says. I had to see you." He states.

He wipes away my tears with his thumb and kissed both of my cheeks.

I can feel him looking at every inch of me. Then I notice I'm not wearing a hoodie once he gets to my arms. He stares at the white and pink scars on my arms for a while. He looks at the burn marks from work.

Today I burned myself on purpose at work because I couldn't handle the pain.

"Did you burn yourself on purpose?" Andy asks.

"Y-Yeah." I stutter.

He looks into my eyes and I can see tears in his.

"Why would you do that to yourself? You're perfect." He says.

"I'm sorry." I mumble.

I look down, but he lifts my face to look at him.

"I love you." He says slowly.

"I love you too." I say back.

He leans in and kisses me slowly.

When we end the kiss he looks at me.

"I love you so much." He says.

I kiss him again.

"Please stay tonight." I beg.

He nods. "If that's what you want."

I yawn and he chuckles. I see his smile and I can't help but smile too. He grabs my hand and leads me up to my room.

I lay down on my bed and pull the covers over me.

"Um...hope you don't mind, but I sleep with my shirt off." He says.

"That's fine."

He takes off his shirt and climbs into bed beside me. I lay my head on his chest and he wraps his arms around my waist. I look up into his eyes to see him looking down at me and smiling.

"I love you." He says and kisses my forehead.

"I love you too." I say back and kiss his lips gently.

Soon I drift off to sleep at the sound of Andy's heartbeat.

Hey guys! #Landy! This was probably pretty cringey! Sorry about that!

Anyway, hope y'all have a good day!

See you on the flip side!