Five Minutes

Only Women Bleed

She couldn't keep saying she would do something without actually going through with.

Veronica spent the next few days researching organizations for survivors of sexual assault and wondering what she could offer that these existing organizations didn't already provide.

It would have been easier to join one, but she didn't think that was enough. She wanted to make a bigger contribution.

The issue was she had no idea where to start. Veronica had no experience in establishing a business. She needed to have proper resources.

The first person she thought to approach was Linda.

Their group had a new face in its mix. A young woman named Dana, who was in her mid twenties. She had dark hair and eyes, with a constant sadness behind them. Like they had lost their brightness.

When Linda first introduced her, Veronica noticed she replicated the same mannerisms that Veronica herself had struggled with when she'd first joined. Dana's head hung low, her eyes downcast to the floor. She had her hands on her lap, her fingers shoved between her legs. Veronica could tell she was nervous and anxious; she probably want to run outside and hide.

"He was nice. He seemed nice, at least. We spent so much time talking. We had a lot of stuff in common and he agreed with some of the stuff I said about gun control and all that. He thought I had good points. He looked at me and he was listening to what I said. It wasn't something I was used to. I'm used to guys wanted to talk about themselves.

"I didn't know what to say when he asked me to come to his place. I mean... I said yes cause I didn't want him to think I wasn't into him.

"I never said no. I never actually told him to stop. I just said I felt tired and had to go. He didn't... he kept trying to convince me to stay. I was scared to say no so I stayed.

"When I told my friend she just thought it was a bad date and I should have left."

"What a bitch," Veronica blurted. Her reaction was instinctive and when she felt eyes on her, she felt stupid for disrupting Dana's devastating account. "I'm sorry."

"No, don't be," Dana said. She was looking at Veronica; it was the first time she'd made direct eye contact since the beginning of her story. "She's a bitch. We got into a fight about it. We haven't really talked since."

"If you're are not comfortable and are forced to do anything against your will, that isn't a bad date," Linda began. "People often believe you need to distance yourself from an uncomfortable situation, but they fail to realize that it's easier said than done. They construe it as incident that could have been easily avoided."

"And since I couldn't, it's my fault," Dana added.

"Exactly," Linda said. "But it never is."

Veronica saw a smile on Dana's face.

_______

As the group filed out of the room, Veronica received her opportunity to approach Linda. She had second guesses about her plan, but did discarded that hesitation. Whether she failed or not, she was trying to do something.

"Is it all right if I talk to you for a second?" she asked.

Linda was still standing by the chair she'd been seated at, drinking a bottle of water. She turned the cap tightly in her hands. "Of course," she replied.

"I was, um... " She stopped. Why the hell was she so nervous. Determinedly, she pushed through her anxiety and continued. "I wanted to start an organization for survivors."

Linda's entire face seemed to gleam with enthusiasm and happiness. "That's so great!" she exclaimed, grinning.

Veronica grinned back. "Thanks," she said. "I know I'm not this big actress, but I was hoping to use my name to build momentum."

"I'm very proud of you for doing that. I've always believed if you have the power, you should use it in a good way."

"Thank you. I don't... it might not even work, but I want to be able to fight. But... I don't...exactly know how to do it. I don't have much experience with it so... I was wonder if you'd be able to help."

"Of course. I'd be more then happy to help!"

Veronica didn't know why she had doubts. Did some part of her think Linda wound have refused to lend a hand? Nothing in her demeanour suggested that.

"Really?" Veronica asked, instinctively reaching out to give Linda a hug, which Linda happily accepted.

"I'm excited for you!" Linda said.

"Then maybe we could discuss it after our next meeting? I think your suggestions will be better than mine."

"That sounds great."

"Then I'll see you next week then," Veronica said.

"Drive safe."

Veronica left the building and got into her car still feeling restless. She needed support to create a strong foundation, but she didn't know how many people would be behind her for this cause. And despite what she said to Linda, she didn't know if her name would help her. People still thought she was a crazy stalker.

Maybe it was about time she set the record straight. After the rumours circulated, she hadn't defended herself. She made one comment that claimed it wasn't true and nothing else. But she had to defend herself.

It meant reactivating her social media accounts,which she wasn't looking forward to. She wasn't going to consult Iris to see what the smart approach was.