beep..... beep..... beep...
What the hell?
Where am I?
I could hear the odd sound of a beeping that made me highly uncomfortable. I tried to open my eyes but it was almost as if I didn't remember how.
What the hell is going on?
I started to panic, confusion flushing over me as I heard the beeping increase, like a never ending incline. Eventually I felt something touch the palm of my hand and my instant reaction was to squeeze it.
Than I let go.
And then I squeezed it again.
Slowly all of the simple actions and how to preform them were all flooding back to me. I still couldn't open my eyes but my panic decreased and the beeping slowed down again.
And then I heard something else, telling me that all this noise wasn't just in my head. Hopefully.
"You must be Phil" the voice said.
Phil?
"Yeah, is he going to be ok?" Phil said. I couldn't tell why he was talking so fast, or even why I could hear him talking. But all of the sudden the beeping got even slower and I suddenly felt more comfortable.
"Well he seems to be reacting more than he was yesterday"
Yesterday? How long have I been here? Where even is here?
Would somebody tell me what the fuck is going on?!
"What do you mean reacting, reacting to what?" Phil said getting a little louder.
"Well he has been reacting slightly to his name, little things like that" the voice explained.
"No, no doctor you must be confused that's impossible" Phil said. It was true, it really was impossible but it was happening and I couldn't understand why, but whenever Phil talked it didn't matter. I didn't need to figure out why because he was more important.
"How is that impossible, I'm not seeming to understand" the doctor said changing his tone of voice, I still don't understand what those mean but this tone doesn't sound too good.
"No, no doctor that's not what I was intending, it's impossible because he's deaf. He has been deaf his whole life." Phil explained.
"Deaf?" the doctor asked. There was another sound that filled my head right after he said that and for a minute I thought I was going to lose my hearing again, but then the doctor spoke again.
"Why on earth is that not in my notes?"
I still couldn't open my eyes but I heard a faint repeating noise that was different, however mimicking the beeping noise that just wouldn't stop. However that noise soon faded away.
I felt like I was going insane, maybe this is all a dream. Maybe its all in my head.
I try to open my eyes again but when I do I see this bright, painful light that gives me a headache.
Seriously what the fuck is going on?
I feel defeated. I want to try again, I need to know that if I am able to hear now, my sight hasn't been stolen from me. I can't allow that to happen. I am about to try again when I hear Phil's beautiful voice again.
"Dan? Is it true? Can you hear me?" he sniffed as he was saying this and I think he is crying.
I have to try again, if not for me, than for Phil.
I brace myself this time, and just before I try to open my eyes I squeeze his hand one more time.
Its like a battle. But not in the way you would think. When people think of that metaphor, they think it means pushing through no matter how bad it can get. And it would be great if that's what this was like but its not. It feels messy and chaotic and most of all it feels like I might not make it out alive and I just have to keep fighting and except that. And it sucks because I know that when I try and open my eyes again, that blinding light might be the last thing I see and its not fair. But life isn't fair. I am trying to build up the strength to open my eyes hoping that if I succeed everything else will come as a piece of cake. Like opening my eyes is the worst part. Which it probably is. I have no way of knowing, unless I find out. All I really have to do is tell myself that this may be the hardest battle I have to fight, but I cant let it be the last. I cant allow myself to lose this battle out of forfeit.
And then I break through.
"Dan?"
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Look who's back at it again with the cliff hangers.
Has anyone else noticed that my chapters are getting longer? I've been working on trying to make them longer sense I don't update a whole lot its the least I can do.
Speaking of which I promised that I would create a schedule as soon as I reached 2k and I got there!!
Guys I am so happy and I wish I could thank everyone that as ever read this individually but I wouldn't have time to do another update so I will thank you all right here. So thank you!!
What do you guys want my schedule to be like? This is exciting I feel like I'm getting my life together. (lets be honest that's not happening any time soon) But seriously do you want me to update 3 times a week? Is that something we could work out? Keep in mind that it is going to take me a while to get into the whole schedule atmosphere so I might miss a few days in the beginning but I'm going to try. Anyway let me know and I will update you guys as soon as possible!!
Stay alive :)
Enjoy
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ASL// PHAN
Romance*COMPLETED* Dan has gone to this school for his whole life, its really the only place where he effectively communicate with people. Dan Howell is deaf, always has been, and how he sees is always will be. When Phil Lester transfers to his school to t...
