New Beginnings: A Broadway Fanfiction

Fourteen

I sat cross-legged in the corner of that stairwell for what seemed like hours, although it must have only been about 10 minutes. With my head in my hands, I just sat there and tried to find some logical way to justify my actions, or at least to verify that this beautiful friendship I had with Ben wasn't completely damaged. I was so lost in my own worry-filled thoughts that I barely acknowledged Andrew when he somehow appeared in the doorway. "Audie?" He called with obvious feelings of confusion littering his tone. "Why are you sitting here all alone?" It was almost if as I was jarred awake from a deep sleep as I snapped my head towards him and quickly wiped my eyes.
"Oh," I stuttered, promptly pushing myself up into a stand. "I just needed some alone time to think." Andrew cocked his head to the side and gestured out into the hallway.

"And you couldn't have done that in your dressing room because...?"

"... I don't know."

Andrew sighed, but proceeded to hold his hand out to me. I hesitantly took it, and he pulled me into his arms. "You're not mad at me, right?" He murmured while resting his chin on my head. "I wasn't trying to make you upset or anything this morning, I just wanted to know about your social life since it's usually so uneventful and dry... Wait, that sounded really bad. I meant that because I'm your friend, I was just excited for you and-" I cut Andrew off before he had a chance to continue his babbling.

"No, you were an asshole this morning, but I just got a little overwhelmed for other reasons."

Andrew chuckled softly before letting me go from his embrace. "Alright, Audie. If you ever need anything, I'm always here. Now come on, let's go get ready." He tried to grab for my hand, but I pulled back when he did so. Andrew turned towards me with evident perplexion, trying to reach for my hand again.

"I kind of want to stay here and think for a little while longer. I'll catch up with you later, yeah?" I stepped back into the stairwell and positioned myself into the corner, slowly sliding down into my cross-legged position once again. Andrew stared at me for a moment as if I were crazy.

"You're kidding, right?" He gawked, poking his head back into the stairwell and scanning it. When I shook my head, he scoffed. "But... it's so... dirty," He mumbled, gesturing towards the concrete flooring and the rusting rail. "And that exposed insulation? You are stepping right in line to get some fibreglass-asbestos lookin' ass disease..." I rolled my eyes as he continued his rant, but then I pointed towards the hallway behind him.

"You can go do whatever you want, Andy. I'll be fine."

My firm tone must have sent the message to him because Andrew then stepped back and nodded his head. I could tell that he was worried about me, but I knew that I couldn't take any chances in seeing Ben if I happened upon him in the hallway. ​Just wait it out, ​I told myself. ​Ben needs time to cool off​.

—

I ended up moving to my dressing room about 30 minutes later. I admit that I did actively try to avoid running into Ben on my way there, despite the fact that he was probably nestled away in his dressing room. However, I did experience instances of courage where I had considered going to find him, but those moments quickly washed away every time I had even the slightest second to think it through. Once I was safely inside my dressing room, I pondered how I was going to spend the next 2 hours until the show started. I could stop by Andrew's dressing room for a friendly chat, I could catch up on some coursework, I could make myself a meal, I could go on a fucking cruise... All of my attempts in distracting myself were useless, as there was still only one thing on my mind. I eventually settled on writing a speech that I would recite to Ben the next time I was alone with him. Although this would be rather unenjoyable on my part, it was something that I had to do. So I sat there at my makeup counter for almost an hour, drafting a heartfelt apology with a dulled pencil and a few sheets of loose-leaf.

I had almost completed my final draft when I heard a knock at the door. I was incredibly startled because thoughts of Ben possibly standing outside of my dressing room began spinning violently through my head. I anxiously hid my loose-leaf pages behind my makeup bags and quickly scampered to the door. With shaky hands I pulled it open, revealing a bright-smiled Christian. I grimaced when I saw his looming figure, resulting in a short scoff from him. Christian seemed to brush off this abnormal interaction quite quickly though, because his face easily melted back a lustful grin. "Hey, darling." He purred, grabbing my hands and stepping inside of the door frame. He carefully nudged the door with his side, letting it fall closed behind us. "I was thinking that we should, you know, catch up a little?" Christian then pressed his thumb to my cheek, causing me to sigh heavily. He was oblivious and undisturbed by this, and he seemingly continued to caress my face and pull me closer. I began to slightly struggle against his grip at this point, causing him to let go and shoot me a curious look. "Is something wrong?" He asked while reaching for my hands again.

"This can't happen again." I blurted sternly, pushing him away from me by his chest. Christian stumbled backward, and his back coming into contact with the dressing room door.

"Jesus," He murmured, catching his balance and rubbing the back of his neck. "What's gotten into you?"

"I just... Christian, I can't do this. I know it's only been like a day, but it has already caused so many problems for me, and I-"

"What does that even mean?" He groaned. "We had so much fun together!" He started to reach for me again, but this time I slapped his hands away.

"Please just respect my decision!" I snapped, stepping back and clutching my arms. Christian seemed taken aback, but he slowly brought his hands to a surrender.

"Alright," he breathed, biting his lip and nodding his head sarcastically. "I'll leave you be."

He turned around and forcefully pulled open the door, almost to the point of busting the handle. For a moment he just stood in the doorway, his back towards me. It seemed as if he was about to turn around and say something, whether it be a string of curses or an apologetic poem. Despite his demeanor, he didn't. Christian then left the room, letting the door fall closed behind him with a heavy thud.