What Happened Last Summer (Boy×Boy)

Chapter Sixteen: Always Love You

Andy went to school the following day, waving to Merilyn as he passed her in the hallway. He saw Derek, who just glanced at him and turned away. Andy knew things were never, ever going to be the same between them, knowing that they'll never bike ride down the mountain every again made him sad. He felt bad for causing Derek so much pain. But Andy knew that something great had ended, and that was his own fault. Was he falling for him? Possibly. He knew he liked him. But he loved Shawn, and he knew he'll always love Shawn, even when he didn't. That's why he was angry, but more at himself than Shawn. Angry at himself for letting himself fall down the endless void that was theirs and only theirs. Now, he stood there in front of Shawn's locker, staring blankly at Shawn. His head was in the locker, searching. When he finally found the text book he's been looking for, Shawn closed the locker.

Surprise read his face, but the look fell instantly. "Hi." Shawn said.

Andy paused before he replied, not knowing what to say. "Hey." Andy looked at Shawn's wrist, more specifically, the hospital band around it.

Shawn had looked up at Andy and slammed the locker. He walked away. Andy ran after him, blocking his path. Shawn attempted to move pass him, but Andy wasn't allowing him through.

"Shawn, please, I just want to talk," Andy insisted.

"I think it's a little too late to talk, Andy."

"Just give me five minutes. Please."

Shawn backed up a few feet, a tired look on his face, taking a breath. He looked Andy straight in the eyes. He made a gesture with his hands telling Andy to go ahead.

"I am sorry I was such a jerk. Just, when I saw you it took me by surprise and I didn't know how to react. And the thought of you coming back into my life scared me. And–"

"Hold in one second." Shawn cut him off. "Do you really this is all about you?"

Andy was confused, having no idea what he was talking about. "What?" He asked.

"Andy, do you think I came here to say 'I love you'?"

Andy couldn't look Shawn in the eyes, feeling something in his stomach bubble. "What?"

"Andy, I didn't come here to get back together with you. I came back here because my Grandmother is dying."

Andy looked at the hospital band wrong Shawn's wrist. He took a deep breath. He felt stupid.

"I told you, I have relatives here, Andy."

Andy took a minute to process all of this. And realized how much of a douche he felt to make this about himself when it wasn't. Andy didn't reply, at a lost of words.

"Shawn–"

"I'm not staying here, Andy. Just going to be here as long as my grandmother is. I love you, I still do, and I think I always will. But I'm going back home."

"So the notes in my locker? What does that mean, Shawn? Was that you just messing around?" Andy said.

"No, Andy. I just couldn't say those things to your face because you didn't want to talk to me,  I stayed out of your way because I figured you didn't want to see my face ever again for hurting you. And I'm sorry, I did that. And I regretted ending things because I realized I'll always love you!"

Their voices were getting louder, sounding angry and frustrated. They looked mad and some people began to stop, watching to see what will happen. Andy was curious how this will end.

"I love you, too, but you can't just love me when I'm here, Shawn. That's not how it works!"

Andy and Shawn noticed the circle of people formed around them, all muttering to their friends. Shawn grabbed Andy by the wrist, dragging Andy along with him, breaking through the audience.

"What are you doing? Let go of me, Shawn!" Andy fought.

They both entered the men's bathroom. Shawn let go of Andy's wrist. They stood silent in the smelly bathroom, waiting for one of them to say something first.

"We clearly need to work something out, Shawn," Andy crossed his arms, looking mad at Shawn.

"Look, I didn't expect for me to actually give into myself, to write you those letters, because I meant everything I said, and it was never my intention to want you back into my life. But I miss you, Andy. I just- I can't be with you without you being next to me." Shawn had lost Andy's gaze, looking down at the tile.

Andy looked at him in disbelief, "Well, then, we can just be friends," he stormed out of the bathroom.