•Benefits• {cash} {boyxboy}

Chapter 1: This Is How It All Started

AN: This fic will mostly be centered around Cameron's POV although others will be included. 

I stood at the foot of my bed. I fixed my tie that I had just done up. I adjusted my suit. It was the one my father bought me before he died.

I liked it quite a lot. It was white and sleek. I smiled at all the memories I had in this suite. I don't know why I was doing this. Actually, I did. But I don't want to explain now. I grabbed the note pad on my side table. I had written a lot on it, mostly to him.

I sighed and placed it down on the pillow. I went over to my closet where I had hid the rope. I had gotten it from our supplies from our boat. I pulled out my chair from my desk. I got on the chair. There were horizontal planks of wood running across my ceiling. I picked the one closest to me and started looping the knot up. I hesitated. With all the dread and emotion I was feeling, I just wanted it to end .Once I had it in the correct way I wanted it, I slipped it around my neck, I took a moment. I wanted this. I wanted to be gone, away from everyone. So I kicked the chair down and felt the rope slice through my skin.

***

3 YEARS EARLIER

Nash was about to come over. I was sitting on my bed going through my tweets when I heard a knock on the door. I looked up and there stood Nash in my doorway. He was wearing a blue button down and khakis with blue vans. He looked gorgeous. It was obvious at this point that I was in love with him, I stopped denying it months ago. I would always ignore how I would tense up every time he was around me or how is touch made me weak.

It was odd when I thought about it, me being so infatuated with Nash. He was my best friend, he was straight and he was completely oblivious to my very obvious advances. 

I was snapped out of my thoughts when Nash sat himself down beside me. "You've been spacy lately, what's up man?" he asked. He didn't look at me though. His attention was on his phone.

This bothered me. He was always on his phone, always.

 I shrugged. "Want to watch a movie?" I asked, desperately trying to change the subject. I didn't want to have that conversation with Nash, I really didn't.

He nodded and I turned on the TV. I decided to put on 22 Jump Street.

It was already pretty late so I drifted to sleep.

I felt myself slowly loose conscious when I heard Nash speak.

"Cam, dude I did not come to visit you so I can watch you sleep!" Nash said while poking my face. I looked up at Nash. His eyes were a bright shade of blue. I looked down and smiled. Nash shook his head. "Well you didn't come to visit me to sit on your phone the entire time yet here we are." I snapped back at him. I know I shouldn't have, I sounded pathetic. "Dude what has been wrong with you lately." Nash stated simply. I shrugged. Nash put his phone down on the side table. He snuggled up next to me. I took a deep breath in. His arms wrapped around my waist. I couldn't take it. I jumped out of the bed and ran out onto the balcony. I couldn't be this close to him, not knowing he could never be mine. I hate feeling like this, I hate it. Tears started rolling down my face.

"Cam..." I head I shy voice from the sliding door. "I'm sorry I'm just not feeling well." I stated. I didn't turn around. I couldn't let him see me cry. He came to stand next to me and I turned away. "Cam? Cam are you crying? Why are you crying did I do something wrong?" he said. He took my face in his hands and wiped away my tears. He moved in closer. I started to get nervous. I looked at his soft plump lips. And that's when Nash did the unthinkable, he kissed me.

He pulled away. "You think I didn't know." he said in a whisper. 

"I see the way you look at me Cameron, I'm not stupid." he continued. He then pushed his lips back on mine. 

He didn't just kiss me he kissed me. It felt... honestly there were no words, no words at all. I smiled into the kiss and he kissed harder. He grabbed my waist and pushed me up against the sliding door. He started kissing down my neck and back to my lips. He then stopped. A huge grin on his face. "You have no idea how long I've wanted to do that for." I said. He smiled and took my hand. "It's cold outside lets go inside." He said with a smirk on his face. "Unless of course you don't want to?" he asked. "I want to." I said as he led me in the room, closing the sliding door behind him so no-one could hear.