don't leave

Titus

Titus (POV)
"only love makes you that crazy sweetheart"-unknown

I sat there, her hand in mine. Her head on my chest. She was just so perfect I couldn't believe that god could create such an angle, The way her chest rises and falls when she breaths makes me want to squeal because it's just so cute.Its always very relieving to see her body being filled with air because it reminds me that she's safe, alive and here with me. That's all I want for her is to be safe and happy. I knew she was special from the day I met her and not special in the bad 'crazy' sorta way. Special as is in she makes me speechless every time she's near me. Every time she touches me I think my heart may just give out and run circles around my body. I know she hates herself for having borderline personality disorder, but i think it's what makes her even more beautiful. It's what makes me love her even more. Her disorder may make her feel more vulnerable and it may make her more sensitive to abandonment.But the fact that she can love so much and feel so deeply makes me admire her strength. I know I struggle with sadness and the idea of death but Alena gives me purpose and she's the reason i'm still alive. I just really hope that one day I can do the same for her. That I can make everything 'alright'  Alena rolled over to look up at me, a smile stretched across her face."it's getting late I think I should go home." she whispered into my ear and she kissed my cheek. "That's a good idea, I'll walk you."

I admire her for her strength and courage. Alena is one of the strongest people i've ever known. She's opened up to me about so many things and past traumas in her life i just wish I could hold her very close to me and make everything awful in her life vanish in a cloud of smoke like you see the magicians do when they leave or enter in a show. she's to precious for any of life's twisted gags. "Promise me you'll never leave." the words fell off her tongue and she held my arm tight. "I promise beautiful." she gave me the sweetest smile as we rose to our feet and begun walking toward her house which was a few short (unfortunately) blocks away. " i hope you know that i plan to marry you one day.." i whispered in her ear as i tucked her hair behind it. I saw a smile form around her lips.
"that's if i can make it.." she smiled up at me blinking her eyes as if she was trying to divert the conversation. "Anyways so what are you doing this weekend?" I was right, she was diverting the conversation.
"Probably just walking the dogs or doing chores but i'm really hoping to see you. Are you busy this weekend?" Alena looked at he ground not daring to meet my gaze. " No not many plans but maybe you can come visit me." The way she said that made my stomach turn unhappily in my stomach. Alena jumped into my arms before i could respond wrapping her arms tightly around my neck. she whispered in my ear. "I love you baby." her lips pressed against my neck playfully as she bounced to her front door. "i love you too Alena." I watched what was left of her shut the door and disappear without a trace. The walk hole was dreaded and not welcoming. each street lights flickered like falling starts at every street corner guiding me home.
"Must be what death looks like."

"Now she's back in the atmosphere drops of jupiter in her hair. walks like summer and talks like rain reminds me that there's time to change."- train drops of jupiter