I Think I Love You {GirlxGirl}

Secrets, Lies, and Friends

  As I opened my eyes, I realized that today was a Wednesday, which meant school. Which meant fake smiles, fake friends, fake love interests. My life was such a twisted little lie. Maybe I should change it, tell Callie I'm lesbian, and just go where the wind takes me. Maybe. Then I could, at least move to being friends with Elizabeth.

 "Shit," I whispered, sitting up, remembering what happened yesterday with her.

We actually had a somewhat normal conversation. Not arguing about something stupid, or well, yeah. Arguing about something stupid. I guess I'm stupid, so it makes a lot of sense now that I think about it. Most people that want to hang out with me are stupid. It's a domino affect.

 I said quietly, "Lets see what this wonderful day has in store for us today."

I went down to eat some breakfast first. I got the cereal, bowl, spoon, and milk. Sometimes I wished my day could be like my mornings. Quiet and with nobody around. Just then, I saw my mother, her wild hair and all, come into the kitchen. She went for the coffee.

 "Morning, sunshine. How are you?" I smiled, eating a spoonful of Fruit Loops.

She scowled, "Really, child? I give birth to you, and this is how you treat me? You're lucky I'm still driving your ass to school."

 "Well, morning to you too," I sighed under my breath.

❤ ❤ ❤

 "Callie, do you think I could tell you something major. Without you getting upset or leaving me forever and ever?" I asked as we gathered our textbooks.

"Duh, yes. I'm your best friend. And between you and me, there wasn't any drama-drama this week," she laughed. "But don't worry, I'll be serious."

"That's nice to know," I mumbled. "But I can't say it in here."

  She shoved her books into her small shoulder bag, "Ow, these books are too much to handle. But yeah, yeah. Outside, that's cool too. Come on, then."

We walked out of the class, stumbling to keep our books from falling. Callie ended up dropping her, twice, and because I laughed, she made mine fall as well. I still didn't know what or how to tell her. Maybe I should leave out the part of how I kinda been using her as a cover up. . . .

 "So, hit me. What's the big thing that's totes important?" she asked, sitting down on the bench by a small tree.

 I remained standing, "Well. . .okay. I guess I'll just kinda come clean. Listen, I don't want you to be really mad or sad or anything. And, please, don't start to cry. I swear if you cry, I will cry. So don't do it. I'm serious."

 "You like, going to tell me right now? Or when I'm thirty and have a gazillion kids?" she laughed, impatiently.

  "Yeah, yeah. Of course, but I thought you didn't want kids? No, anyways moving on," I sighed. "I'm kinda a lesbian."

"What? You a lesbian," she began to laugh hysterically. "Um, no. That's kind of obvious, sweetheart. You never done it, well, let alone been with a guy, so after a while I figured you like girls."

 "It's that obvious!?" I shrieked.

 She nodded, still laughing. If Callie had noticed that easily, then who else has? Would my parents or Callie 'spill the beans' and tell someone, then world would get out about me? Would people still treat me the same? Well, of course they wouldn't because people are strange and judgemental. The person's opinion that mattered most to me right now was Elizabeth's. In a strange way.

 "Well," she began. "Depends on how you look at it. Some of the popular people probably haven't. They're too busy losing their virginity or something. Somebody who's been paying attention, well, maybe."

  My jaw dropped. Callie was never, so. . .well she never talked this much without saying 'OMG' or 'like' or using logic. This was a side of her I had never seen before. One that wasn't obsessed with finding me a boyfriend or the cutest hand-bag that we could find. Maybe she was this smart all along, but was just playing dumb.

"I'm sorry I never told you earlier or something. And since when did you. . .expand you're vocabulary and notice things, like that?" I asked, curious.

"Most popular girls aren't the typical 'you're cute, be my boyfriend' or 'that's my look, bitch' types. Some, like you and I, actually have a brain," she laughed. "Bigger than a wall-nut."

 I laughed too, "I guess we both been lying to each other."

"Yeah, but too bad everyone will know the truth," somebody said.

Callie and I both turned around. Quickly, I scowled. Now, she was the meanest of the mean. The cruelest of the cruel. The second in command, as I called her. Josie Jones. Beautiful, red hair that fell to her shoulders, and striking, icy, blue eyes. And then there was her fiery personality to match her hair. It was as if she was the devil, but as a teenage girl.

 "What do you mean?" Callie asked, acting as innocent as possible.

"Don't play dumb," she scoffed. "I know how smart you are. Bet you're just as smart as the geeks in the honors math class."

"You are in honors though," I laughed as I whispered to Cal.

Josie frowned, "I don't like to keep secrets. So lets just come clean to each other. That sound fair enough?"

 "Why, yes. It so does. Very much. I hear you loud and clear," I said as sarcastically as I could.

"Don't mock me, Leslie. You know I was always better than you. And you being a 'lesbian' is just perfect. Nobody wants a girl to rule the school who likes girls," she snapped. "So you watch your pretty little mouth or else I'll shut it for you."

 I sighed, "Leslie? Really? And okay, Josie. So what do you want us to do?"

"Leslie the lesbian. But anyways, I don't really know. Maybe turn the power over to my best friend and I. And why did you become a lesbian? Well who?" she laughed.

Callie stood in front of me, "Just leave her alone. We'll give you the 'ultimate power' as long as you don't say a word to anyone what you just heard."

She smiled, "That's fine. And I just want to hear Anica's answer. Don't get all butt-hurt, relax."

"But what if it's private? That's invading her space," Cal protested.

 Josie ignored her and turned to me, "Come on. Be a sweetheart and tell you're good friend, Jo Jo. Please?" 

I sighed, "You really want to know?"

"Yes! Of course," she smiled. "Maybe I could hook you up with her. You could live your little lesbian dream!"

 I paused for a moment and thought about it. Of course I couldn't say Elizabeth's name. That would be suicide. Maybe I could use Callie's as a lie, but then she'd freak. Then it hit me, and I couldn't wait to tell her.

"So, who was it?" she asked again, this time a little more impatient.

 "You," I lied.