That Was Then, This Is Now

Part 12

Surely this is a joke. I have to have dinner at the bluebird with Tim. I don't want to go to a restaurant we used to frequent as lovers with him when we're just pretending to be friends to sell a record. Currently I'm sitting in his living room with a stylist, a publicist and Gary while they offer wardrobe options. I think Tim is in his room doing the same thing.
"What about the red dress?" Ask Gary.
"God, no. That's to 'this is a date and I wanted to look really nice for it' and besides the bluebird is casual." Says Petra my stylist. "I think these jeans, and a black turtleneck is the way to go." I always love a pair of jeans and turtle neck so she is speaking right into my soul. She hold up a pair of blue jeans that have a braid along the seams by the front pockets.
"Petra I love those." I say getting.
"I knew you would. They are right up your alley. I also brought a fantastic little gold cross necklace to go over the turtleneck." She says handing them over to me.
"I can work with this. Are you doing her hair and makeup?" Asks the publicist. Her name I can't remember.
"Yeah I will." I go to the bathroom to change and return to see a chair and vanity case all set up and ready for. The makeup and hair straighteners are ready, but it's crazy how much effort we're putting in to make it look like we weren't trying at all. The publicist has gone and Gary is in the kitchen far enough away for me and Petra to talk.
"He got hot Faith." She says.
"Who?" I ask coyly.
"Tim. Silly."
"Oh really? I hadn't noticed." I lie. How could you not. He has really gotten hot.
"Yeah, right. So how do you feel about the whole thing?" She asks. I feel like I could break down. This is the first time I've been asked how I feel, and not had my feelings assumed.
"God I don't know. I mean I hate what he did. I hate how he made me feel, I hate what he turned himself into, I hate what he made us. But I loved him." I sigh as she brushes my hair.
"Do you still love him?" She asks tentatively.
"Uh I mean it's hard because I loved him so much and I gave him everything I had and there's no coming back from a love like that. So yeah I still love him, but I love that Tim who never hurt me." I must sound like a crazy woman, how can you love someone that doesn't exist?
She carries on getting me ready and I can't believe the magic that she's able to perform. Gary come over as she's doing the finishing touches.
"All of Scott's stuff is waiting for him on the porch and you've got the penthouse at the four seasons for the next few weeks until it blows over." He says to me and returns to his laptop.
"Oh shit! Faith I'm so sorry. Here I was asking you about Tim and I forgot about Scott." She says.
"Oh no! It's fine, he's an ass I've known that for years. I knew when we broke up the first time and I should've remembered it sooner." I say.
"Well if you need anything let me know." She says. Soon I'm all done and Tim enters the room and he looks like he's been done a while. He's got on a nice pair of jeans and a short sleeved button down. God knows why he never feels the cold, but at least his arms look nice.
"Alright! So you two let's sit down and go over this." Says Gary. We take a seat at the dining room table with our managers. "Y'all will drive to the bluebird in Tims truck from here. You can go have some dinner and talk to each other. Keep it light, laugh and all that stuff. Please don't look tense." He looks right in my eyes as he smears that part. "Then when you're done Tim take Faith back to my house. Not her house and not the four seasons. Mine. Okay?" Asks Gary.
"Yep." We say nodding our heads.
"Okay, well have fun!" Says Jack leading us to the elevator. We walk to his car and ride to the bluebird in silence. I know that the car that's been following us the whole way is Gary and Jack but it still doesn't ease my nerves. I feel my phone vibrate. Gary: you two need to look friendly. Don't hold hands. Walk in close together. For the love of god smile. Pretend to be old friends. Wow. I show Tim the message.
"Pretend to be old friends." He laughs. "Well, old friend let's go." He says getting out of the car. He walks around to my side and opens my door for me. I can see the cameras flashing as son as my feet hit the pavement. He walks behind me gently guiding me towards the door with a light hand on my waist. Not to much. We get inside an the room is relatively quiet. I mean it is a Wednesday night so theres a small 2 person band playing some quiet music and a few other tables. I love the bluebird. No cares that I'm Faith Hill. Theyve all seen better. We are led to a small table near the centre of the room. Tim pulls my seat out for me and I smile at him. The waitress gives us each a menu and says that's she will be back in a couple of minutes.
"Wow." I let out almost accidentally.
"Weird right." He says. We're using hushed tones and I guess we're both as nervous as each other.
"Who would've thought that you an I would end up back at a table here at the bluebird?" I say laughing slightly trying to make light of the situation for the cameras outside.
"Yeah. Crazy." He says. He's uncomfortable. I can tell he's shut off. He's put that fake smile on that glazes his eyes over and he's done.
"So how's your mom?" I ask him. I know this will wake him up. I can see his whole face lift straight away. He loves his mom so much and just the mention of her brings him right back to me.
"She's great!" He smiles. "I just got her a new car so she's been driving up almost every other week to come see me." I can see how proud he is. I think that's the main reason he never gave up on his dream. He wanted to pay his mom back for everything.
"That's great Tim!" I say. We then scan the menus and the waitress quickly returns.
"Hey y'all. My name is Carol and I'll be your server this evening." She says. She's young and blonde, very pretty, the classic bluebird waitress. "What can I get y'all to drink?" She Asks, she's checking out Tim.
"Um I'll have a coke and for Faith..." He trails off.
"Oh um I'll have a Pinot Gris thanks." If I'm going to get through this I'll need the social lubricant that is alcohol.
"All right. And to eat?" She says looking at Tim.
"Um, you know what? Surprise me." He says winking at her. Yuck.
"And you miss?"
"Same. Thanks." I say handing her my menu.
"Alright I'll bring your drinks out right away." She says ducking off.
"You just made her year." I say to him.
"What?" He asks.
"She was checking you out like no tomorrow and I swear I saw her heart stop when you winked at her." I laugh. I mean sure I hate it. I don't ever want to think about Tim and anyone else ever but we've gone our seperate ways so tough biscuits Faith. 
"Yeah well, that's what a nice guy does." He laughs. He knows exactly what he did and I mean his new hot brand that he's got clearly is built upon him being a man about town, he's just living it out.
"Riggggghhhht." I draw out. Carol come out with our drinks and puts them in front of us.
"Your food is about 15 minutes away." She says leaving. God I have to sustain 15 minutes of conversation.
"What about your family?" He asks.
"They're great. My brothers getting married in a month. I think it's the weekend after the CMAs. My mom and dad are good too. I keep asking them to move closer but you know my dad." I laugh.
"Yeah. What was it that he always used to say. The city just doesn't have enough room for me." We both laugh.
"Yeah that's the one."
"Well I'm glad. My mom misses you." He says.
"Ohh really?" I ask. Betty is the loveliest woman I have ever met. She is every bit as graceful as she is kind. I think that besides losing Tim losing his family was hard.
"Yes. Of course. How could she not? She's always listening to your new music. When I got her that new car the first thing she wanted to know was if it was going to play your CD." He smiles.
"That's really sweet." I say smiling.
"I mean yea, but also that album that came after we broke up. Scathing" He laughs. "She was so made at me."
I can't help but laugh too. I can imagine Betty listening to it and being like 'that son of mine.'
"I would love to see her! When is she coming up again?" I ask.
"Shit! I forgot! She gets her in 2 days, luckily it's only for a few days."
"That's great! I'll have to catch up with her." I say sincerely.
"I think she'd love be over the moon to see you." He looks me in the eyes when he says and all of a sudden I feel like that young girl in the red Jeep.
"Here are your chef specials." Says carol bringing out to plates. "I told him y'all were special guests so he made y'all something real nice." She puts the plate in front of us and it looks delicious. "Can I get y'all anything else?"
"I'm fine. Thanks." I say.
"No we're alright. Thank you." I can't really describe the look on her face when Tim says this, disappointment maybe? I don't know.
"This is delicious. God I missed the bluebird." I say taking a bite from my meal.
"It really is. Haven't been here in a while then I gather?"
"I mean it was kind of a place I went with you, and Scott hates their food so no I haven't?" I admit. "You?"
"Well my sister Tracey loves the place. But that's about it. Speaking of Scott, how is he?" He says taking a bite.
"I don't know. I kicked him out today." I say. God, I must be going crazy.
"Shit. Are you okay?" He asks.
"I mean he's an ass. You remember surely. And I guess I thought enough was enough, or at least Gary did."
"Wow, I'm so sorry." He says. "Kinda."
"What does that mean?" I ask him intrigued.
"If he's an ass I'm glad it's over but I'm sorry that you're sad."
He's so nice. "I need us to acknowledge how weird this is please." I say.
"Yeah. We've been thrown in the deep end and we're just supposed to be okay talking to each other. Like it's no big deal or whatever." He says reading my mind.
"I think personally we're doing a great job of pretending this is okay." I laugh. I mean we have serious issues. Like major ones you can't just shrug off but apparently we are.
"Yeah, well I've enjoyed catching up." He says. We finish our meals and we catch up. I find out his sister joined the army, he found out my aunt died. I realised suddenly that when we went our seperate ways we lost more than each other. We lost the families we had become apart of.
Carol comes to collect our plates and to ask if we want dessert. I say no, because I have a CMA dress to fit into in a couple of weeks, and Tim says yes because we'll look at him. She brings him his chocolate cake and I'm instantly jealous.
"You've been eyeing it out for at least 5 minutes. Share?" He says.
"Um... no I can't."
"Yes you can!" He says sliding the plate across to me. I shake my head. Suddenly my phone lights up with a text from Gary. Eat a piece of the cake!!!! Of course. He has been watching the whole thing.
"Okay fine." I take a bite and then maybe one more and push Tim's plate back to him.
"Good?" He asks laughing.
"Mmmmh" I nod. He finishes the cake and then we get the bill which he quickly stops me from contributing to and the we leave. He leads me to the car by again placing his hand on my waist. By this time there are more people with cameras yelling out names. I direct him to Gary's place.
"Thank you. I had a really great night." I say turning towards him as he turns off the car.
"Yeah me too. I guess I'll see you tomorrow."
"Yeah I will." I say lightly touching his hand in the gear stick. I get out and walk to the front door, I see he's watched me the whole way up. As I open the door to go in I hear him drive off. I wonder if Gary's daughters are still up.
"OMG! FAITH! TELL US EVERYTHING!" Of course they are.