The Sun Shines Brightest in June (Completed) gxg

Friday, August 29, 2003

It was the day before we had to leave again. Klara hadn't caved in at all, but that Friday I had an advantage and I wasn't afraid to use it.

"It's our last full day together and the weather is really nice today. We should do something fun."

"There are other fun things to do."

"I think you're just avoiding swimming, though, and that it's not that you just aren't in the mood. Come on, Klara. Just this once."

She sighed.

"Alright, but only because it's our last full day together. That... and... It's really warm in here today."

I smiled and jumped up from the bed and ran to my side of the closet where I dug out shorts and a t-shirt. Klara rolled off slowly.

"I'll go change in the bathroom and we can meet downstairs."

She nodded in agreement. Changing in separate rooms had been her decision at the start of the summer. I had always gone with it, never questioned it.

I made sure to walk normally down to the end of the hall so she would hear me leaving. I also needed to give her a moment, so I stood for about one to two minutes before making my way quietly back to our room. I didn't want her to hear me, because if she did she would surely cover up whatever she was hiding.

I took a deep breath, prepared for the worst, and swung the door wide open. Klara turned around abruptly and jumped when she saw me. There was a trace of fear in her eyes that immediately made me regret my decision. If I could have, I would have slipped back out the door and pretended it was somebody else, but it wasn't, and I couldn't.

"Sadie!" she almost shrieked. "What are you doing!?"

"I... uh...." I should have just told her that I forgot something. Surely she would have forgiven me for that. My mind wasn't quick enough, though. I couldn't do anything but tell her the truth. "I was concerned."

She grabbed the blanket off of her bed and wrapped it around her shoulders before sitting down. Her eyes were now narrowed, but not from anger. More from confusion.

"Concerned about what?"

I took a step into the room and shut the door behind me.

"Concerned about... you," I admitted."

"Me? ...Why?"

"Well... uh... you seemed like you were hiding something. It's the way you dress now. I heard a story before that a girl was... um... she was hurting herself and she tried to, you know... cover it up."

She stared at me for a moment. A stare so intense that it was making me start to sweat. It was hard to tell what she was thinking, because her expression was blank, but soon enough she sighed. Her eyes dropped to the floor. She looked sad now.

"That's not what's going on," she said.

"Then what is it?" I asked.

She stood up, leaving her blanket on the bed behind her and put her arms at her side. I couldn't see anything wrong with her. She looked perfectly fine. There were no scars on her body, only pale, clear... flawless skin.

"Can't you tell?" she asked after a long silence.

I raised an eyebrow, confused, intrigued. What could she possibly see wrong about herself?

"I don't know what you're referring to," I admitted.

She gestured to her chest, her cheeks turning a tad bit red. She kept her eyes on the floor as I tried to figure out what could possibly be the issue. There was only one real difference I could see. She was definitely bigger than me.

My mother bought me my first bra when I was ten. It wasn't what I considered to be a real one, since I didn't exactly have much of anything to hold in place, and there certainly wasn't anything to be pushing up, though that wasn't a concern of mine anyway at eleven years old.

Klara was different, though. She was one of the girls who was actually more... um... developed I guess you could say. She had one of those "real" bras. A pretty one too. It was the same pale blue as her eyes, and had a little white bow in the center. There were a few girls in my class like Klara, but most were somewhere in between me and her. It was another area I felt I was falling behind in. Looking at Klara, I couldn't tell why she would be upset. I sort of wished I was in her position instead.

"I don't see anything wrong, Klara."

"I don't like them."

"Why not?"

She finally looked up at me.

"Because," she said. "People look at me differently. Mostly guys, but sometimes girls do too, because they're jealous or something. That's what my mom says. The boys, though... they do it for another reason. They're suddenly showing all of this interest in me and I don't like it."

"You don't want them to give you that kind of attention?"

She shook her head.

"No. Not at all. I want boys to like me for me, not because I have bigger boobs than at least half the other girls in my class. It makes me uncomfortable... the way they look at me. Even Jake acts different around me than he used to, more pushy, and his hands always seem to be finding their way to places I don't want them. I mean... I'm only thirteen."

I walked over to the other side of the room where she was still standing beside her bed and wrapped my arms around her waist, pulling her into a hug.

"I'm so sorry. For everything. For tricking you."

"It's alright, Sadie. I can't blame you for being concerned. I should have just let you know."

"You didn't have to, though. It should have been your choice to tell me. If you didn't want anyone to know I should have respected that."

She hugged me back, tightening her grip around my shoulders before breaking apart. I stepped back, feeling my cheeks burning. Klara was still without a shirt and the softness of her skin on my arms and hands had been a reminder of that.

"So..." I started, breaking the awkward silence that followed. "Do you still want to go swimming?"