Right Thru Me

Chapter 15

~Nicki~

I pretended to be sick the next morning so that I wouldn't have to go to school. I just really needed a day to myself. And once mom leaves for work, I can go hang out with Roman or something. When she tried to wake me up I told her in a fake groggy voice that my throat was killing and that I had a migraine. She let me stay home. She probably knew that I was lying though.

"Why are you staying home?" Roman asked me as he walked into my room after mom left.

"I just need a day to myself..."

"What happened?"

"I...I-I uhh had.......I had sex with Wayne..." I started. He looked at me with wide eyes. "And it was really good but afterwards I felt nothing but guilt and while I was in bed last night I read this long ass email from Willy telling me how sorry he was and just I...I hate Willy so much because I love him so much...like, if it weren't for him, I wouldn't have felt any type of guilt after hooking up with Wayne. And now I just...don't even wanna talk to Wayne anymore. I just...I can't...I cannot do this" I cried. He sat next to me and cradled me for comfort.

"Shhhhh sh sh sh, its okayyyy" he said when he realized that I was beginning to cry. "Do you wanna go shopping with me and Marshall?"

"No Roman, you don't have to do that. I'll just stay home and relax. I need some 'me time'" I answered.

"Okay, well I'll be back around 4:00PM" he said.

"What time is it now?" I asked.

"Like 9:30AM, but I'm going to Marshall's house."

"When do you start homeschooling again?"

"Never, I'm getting enrolled to your school starting Monday."

"Oh my god, yay! That's good news" I said trying to sound cheerful.

"Try to keep yourself occupied Nic...I know you're hurt. But pain is temporary. Trust me" he said softly. Then he left. I decided to take a nap.

When I woke up it was 3:00PM and I had one new text message from Miley. It said: "Where are you Nicki? Why aren't you in school???" with a lot of crying emojis.

"Needed a day to myself...sorry" I replied with a heart.

"You okay?" she asked.

"No, but I'll be fine. Pain is only temporary my friend, lmaooo" I responded.

"One of THOSE days...come to my houseeee" she replied with a cigarette emoji.

"You know what? I will. I could definitely use the distraction" I replied. Then I got ready. When I got to her house, she and Wiz were already baked.

"Damn son! You couldn't wait???" I complained. Then she passed the weed without a word, just a giggle. I breathed it in. Deep, long breath. I let the smoke fill my lungs and I let air fill my head. I was on cloud nine, and I loved it. It seemed as though weed was the only thing keeping my mind off of all the shit I didn't wanna think about.

"Your hair is black! I love it!" Miley said cheerfully, noticing my new look.

"Thanks" I said.

"So, tell me what happened" she said.

"Oh, so get this. I fucked Wayne. And it was good. But then I was just like 'dammit man, I wish I didn't do that!'" I said with uncontrollable giggling.

"Damn son" Wiz said.

"Wait, wait" Miley said, laughing ten times harder than I was. But it was one of those laughs when you wheeze a lot and you can barely even talk and your face turns red and you feel like your stomach is gonna explode. "Why did you feel guilty?" she asked.