The Hardest YOU Hart!

VI CHAPTER: FOR WHATEVER WE LOSE

On my next day off, I took my bike, a picnic basket with food I cooked and went to the beach. The view was impeccable, incredibly extraordinary, and no too far from my old memories. I still cannot remember when was the last time I felt like this? So peaceful, so grateful and relaxed.

Nothing like a glass of delightful wine, some grapes, pastrami sandwiches, and bites of cheese to spend a sunny day lying on the sand. The best part of it was the sunset... The sun going down, hiding itself from the horizon, with those orange, red, pink layouts crossing the horizon, looking like a painting. So natural, so beautiful. Feeling the warm summer breeze touching my skin.

I just wanted to stay there for the rest of my days. I wish! But I cannot. On my next day off I will bring a blanket and will spend the night there, with a bonfire a really good book and some marshmallows, cookies and chocolate. DEFINITELY!

AFTER AN INCREDIBLE REST, I am more than prepared for another day at the club. Weekdays are not as busy as the weekends, but still, it is summer, and people are always trying to have fun. The only time when it is quiet is at 6 p.m., when many of them have left already, and those who stay are eating at the restaurant.

Speaking of our guests... The Waltz ladies are all here tonight. And they are not alone. I can figure is Mr. Waltz with them and Jordan is making some company, too. Kind of an awkward moment I must say, when they all saw me taking some plates, glasses and leftovers inside a tray. Awkward for them! Not for me, I am already used to being a waitress now, but there seemed to be a problem with Jordan and Geneva, of course.

I assumed it has to do with the fact that a simple waitress teaches Jordan, an elite guy, how to dance a simple waltz. I suppose he blamed the song, the dance floor, Nova and everything else. He would not take any responsibility for his deplorable dancing moves. I cannot blame him, that was so embarrassing in every way. And it could be more upsetting that a staff member showed him how to do it.

That was so expected of him! But what was not expected at all, was the invitation I received from Geneva Waltz to join them at dinner. What?! Me? Am I going to sit at their table?! Is this a joke or something like that? I am looking at their faces, Nova and Char seemed to be happy about the invitation though. Geneva was giving nothing away. Jordan was kind of upset and the guy with them, was expressionless. Should I say 'yes' and accept their kind disposition?

I had no idea! But what I remember is that my dad always told me that I need to be polite with people, especially when they are trying to be nice to me. Mom used to say that I should trust everyone until they show me otherwise. That is exactly what happened with Jason. And I will give Geneva and the Waltz the chance to show who they truly are.

They pulled a chair and I sat in the middle of Char and Nova. Must I feel awkward or uncomfortable? I do not think so! They all were so nice to me. Even Jordan thanked me for the dancing lessons, after apologizing for his attitude that day. I was thrilled, being honest, because I never thought a very manly (sexist) and arrogant guy will appreciate the fact that a girl can teach him a lesson (how to move) or even worse, that he was humiliated by a woman.

His apology and appreciation seemed sincere to me, so I accepted his thanking and kind words. After dessert, they still stay for drinks and more chatting. I feel very tired, so I gave away my goodbyes and walked to the restaurant's door to exit. Nova offered herself to walk me to the clubs outside courtyard. That was really sweet of her! And for the first time since I got here, I really feel I have friends.

Before she gave me a-not-so-awkward-hug I asked her if Jordan apologized to her before he did to me. She said nothing about it. After a few seconds she remained in silence I asked her again, but this time was a different question

- Are you happy? -

- Why are you asking me that? -

- Just answer, okay? -

- Is that a tricky question? -

- No! But judging from your attitude, it may be a rhetorical one. -

- What is that supposed to mean? -

- I do not know! You tell me. -

- What do you want from me? -

- I asked you a question! I just want you to give me an honest response. That is all! -

- I am! Okay... Happy? -

- I am not sure. I want you to be. -

- Why? You are not even my friend. -

- I wish you can tell me the truth. That is all. But I guess you are right. We are not even friends, so Please forgive me and thank your mom for dinner again, okay? -

- No, wait! I am sorry. -

-Do not be! -

I had no idea why I felt this way. I felt hurt, betrayed. Why? She is right! She is right. We are not friends. We barely know each other. Why should I care about her happiness and her relationship with Jordan? Perhaps I was overreacting about this because of my own situation. Even Greggie thought I was just being a bitch.

- Why do I give a shit for these people? -

- I wonder myself that so many times. A day! -

- You are so hilarious my friend. I was missing your sense of humor, today! -

- Oh please, I know! However, I assume your condition of fairy-god-mother as the result of all of the suffering and pain you went through with Jason. And here is my advice for you honey. Stop thinking and pretending you are going to liberate the entire world from the bad people. Or worse! You are going to eradicate poverty and hunger. Not everybody is like you are. Not everyone wants to be a hero, neither is capable of rescuing the less fortunate people. That is the funny side of life, and honestly, you must see the differences in every single person, not as a reason to ignore them or being indifferent, but as the way to help them and share with them what is possible. Remember there is an invisible and very tiny little line between what is real, and what is just an illusion! But be careful, do not take their problems as your very own ones, and do not overthink about issues you are not able to solve or at least give a solution for. -

I do not even know when Gregory became my father, but his words have an incredible meaning and lots of truth. His wisdom and sense of reality overwhelm me. My mom would be so proud of him right now. She loved him as she loved us (me and Jay). Whatever, after Skyping with Greggie and dad, I had to take a very relaxing bath with lavender, forest and woods fragrance oils, my favorite ones. I was listening to my playlist and suddenly I started to fall asleep.

My home phone rang in the middle of the night. It was an unidentified number. When I picked up Nova's voice was in the other end of the line. What a surprise! I really did not expect it. First of all, because only few people have this number, and with few I mean two, Tessa, from the County Club and Gregg. Second of all, Nova Waltz on the phone? Really? Was this a kind of prank, or was it because I was already asleep?

Anyway, I took her call and she said that she was sorry about what happened between me and her at the club. Seriously? She did not have to bother, I mean, it was my fault, if someone is responsible for it. Her way to apologize was inviting me to a dinner party at her house, in honor to Chars birthday. A birthday celebration with bunch of unbendable people and hypocrites. NO thank you! I know how these kinds of events are, especially at Bay's place.

Instead, in the name of being polite, I asked her to grab dinner at my place. I would cook for her so we can sign a peace covenant, with wine, grapes, cheese and some deli, too. And only maybe, we can become friends. I did not mention any detail about the menu, but she offered to bring dessert. She will bake she said. Cannot wait to taste her treats anyway! She sounded very confident at the phone when we spoke about it.

But I have to be honest, I need to deliberate that after I have tried some.