Hearts are Blind (Severus Snape X OC)

Pains of the Heart

It was just dinner time when they got to Hogwarts that night. Students bustled in a buzz of excitement to be back at school. It wasn't nearly as crowded outside or as loud as the start of the year, but everyone still seemed to be in good spirits as they made their way to the oak double doors of the castle. Lucinda was paranoid. She thought for sure that she was going to see others staring at her, whispering and pointing, but the most anyone did was give a hug here and there or a frantic wave of hello.

"Have a nice holiday?!" they'd call over their shoulders as they were swept away by the current of students.

"My grandma almost choked on a turkey bone!" another said to her as they entered into the great hall.

No one was giving her secretive or flabbergasted looks. Everyone looked genuinely happy to see her. Everyone looked happy to see everyone. It was surreal. It was as if nothing had happened over her break. She wanted to see if Tristin would give her dirty looks when she walked in, but she didn't dare look at his table. Everything seemed to be going alright. She was afraid if she made eye-contact with him, it would suddenly push him to blurt it out in front of the whole school. She didn't dare look up at the staff table, either. She was able to chance it, only because she was walking and staring straight ahead, but once she sat down she kept herself turned toward her plate and that was it. She talked with her friends and laughed when it was warranted, but she had a knot in her stomach the entire time. She saw a glimpse of Snape before she sat down, but he was talking with Dumbledore, so that was one less thing to twist her stomach over. However, she knew she couldn't afford to relax or lower her guard just yet. Something was going to happen. It was definitely going to happen.

Minutes passed and the headmaster stood and spoke to the hall, welcoming everyone back from Christmas break. Lucinda took the chance and stared up at the staff table. Snape was looking directly at her. She shifted her eyes to watch Dumbledore, but they were sitting right next to each other and it was hard to ignore his stares. Her mind started to run wild: did it look like she was looking at the headmaster or the potions master? Was Tristin watching her watching them? Did he think she was just ogling at their professor? Before long, she couldn't take it any longer and had to look down at her plate again. She had to get out of there. She didn't think she could even make it through half of the meal. She'd hardly eaten anything, as it was. She looked at her plate, trying to take bites here and there, but everything tasted the same. It all gurgled in her stomach, as the acids churned and bubbled. Was she going to be sick or was this her own guilt consuming her and wanting to spew a confession to Tristin? Either way, she felt that she had to leave or something very, very bad was going to happen.

"Lucy, you okay?" Clover said across from her.

Lucinda looked up at him, unable to even change her expression. It was only then that she finally realized that Gabriel was not at their table. Memories came flooding back to her and she remembered Clover and Gabe's break up (as told by Aurora). Her guilt consumed her more after that...

"I'm just... not feeling well." She answered and she knew it was believable, because she could feel how flushed her face was and she felt a bead of sweat starting to form at her temple. She swallowed and she could feel every contour of her tongue sliding against the back of her throat. It made her feel even sicker. None of this was good...

"Lucy, maybe you should just go lie down," Aurora stared over at her with concern. "Classes start back up in the morning and you should probably get as much rest as you can."

The girl shook her head. "No, I—I don't want to draw attention to myself..." she mumbled, hoping Aurora would get the hint.

Aurora did. She glanced behind them and Lucinda wished she wouldn't. He was definitely going to see her looking and say something. Oh god, he was going to say something. She really was going to be sick—