Hearts are Blind (Severus Snape X OC)

Those Words I Could Not Say

It was late when she finally arrived in Hogsmeade that night. She'd taken a train part of the way, but they stopped running after 9pm. She tried to apparate to the little village outside Hogwarts, but she ended up half a mile off course. She didn't want to risk overshooting, so she walked a bit in the dark (not wanting to try apparating again). All the while, she kept ever so calm. She was surprised at how composed she felt, honestly. It was as if she'd aged several years in the last few days. It was like someone else controlled her movements. She was just the spectator...

The train station was quiet in Hogsmeade, as she passed it to make her way up the path to the castle. It was almost ten o'clock—early enough that some staff might still be awake, but late enough to not walk into a hall full of students. Whether this was a comfort or not, she wasn't sure. Her mind stayed as blank as she dared let it, while still keeping her head around her surroundings.

The night was still and silent; a little foggy, but not as cold as it had been. March was right around the corner. The days would get warmer, the snow would melt, and Hogwarts would glimmer in the light of spring's sun again. Students would enter into the last part of their school year and they'd start prepping for their end of term exams. Lucinda would be...

Lucinda would—

An owl glided overhead, as the girl made her way to the front gates. She looked up into its silhouette, dark against the star-dusted sky. It glided slow, as if allowing her to gaze upon its majestic movements just a moment longer. She took a calming breath, as the owl dipped over the castle wall. Then she snapped a mental picture, as it passed in front of the windows of the Great Hall. Some candles still burned inside and cast a pulsing, orange haze on the ghostly grounds outside. As snow crunched under foot, Lucinda thought of her mother. And her father. And the countless other students who had taken these very same steps; the swell of butterflies that must have beat within their chests at the sight of the school for the first time. She was no different. That first look at the castle thrilled her beyond anything prior in her life. Her heart swelled even now...

How did they all feel in their last year of schooling? Had they gotten so used to the castle walls, the trick staircases, the daily grind of magic, that by their seventh year it was all second-nature and old news? Did they care, at all, that they would be leaving..? Lucinda couldn't explain her deep sorrow at that moment. Or perhaps she could, but to confront her feelings would be to shed light on the reality of everything else—

"Lucinda?"

The girl jumped out of her skin. She'd been staring through the bars of the gate and was in such deep thought, that she hadn't even noticed the figure sitting a few feet away. His back was against the front of the gates and he was staring down the path she'd just walked. His dark hair and clothes were hard to make out in the recycled light from the castle, but his pale skin was like a milky beacon of familiarity. His onyx eyes shined with moonlight, as he stared at her. Both his voice and his expression were full of surprise and disturbance.

"Professor Snape..."

There he sat, unapologetic and without remorse. Oh, how could he be sitting there, just as he was? And, alas, with no warning. She'd wanted to talk to him—or at least just see him—but she hadn't expected him to be the first person she met. She thought she'd have to find him. She wasn't sure he'd even be there... Of all the things she wanted to say to him—all of the things she could not say to him—all she could manage in that first moment was—

"Why are you out here?"

He was already standing up. He moved slowly, but fluidly. "So, they discharged you, then?" He asked, ignoring her question; and there was a strangeness to his voice. It was as if he was holding back, like a wary parent preparing to deliver an anthology of bad news. "How are you feeling?" He straightened, but he didn't come near. One foot slid out to take a step, but then he subtly pulled it back. "Are you alright?"