Safe & Sound

Chapter 2

The bell symbolizing class starting rings seconds later. An old lady walks into the class room and sits down at the teachers desk. 

"Hello everyone! Welcome to Stevenson High!" She says loudly. "I'm Mrs. E, and I will be your Home Room teacher! I know that this is your first day of Grade 9 and your all probably bursting with excitement, but please contain your feelings as we introduce each other!"

This is what I am dreading. I know I have to do this in every class. Get up in front of total strangers and talk to them. If I make the wrong impression, i'm done for. If they find out about my Anxiety, I might as well say goodbye to the idea of having friends, and be content with having Helena as the only person to talk to. Plus, Helena will have no problem making friends, she is exactly what you think of when you picture a popular kid. But if this was the case, why was she attached to me? Is this just  a plan? I set-up for her to tell everyone about my Anxiety? I am trusting her with this secret! I start to panic and start tying my rope fiercely. 

No one can know. Loop and through. No one can know. Under the knot and over. No one can know. Around and pull. No one can know. 

Everything starts to blur together, and my heart starts pounding. I try to focus on the knots.

Loop and through. Under and over. Around and pull.  

"Mack" Helena says, shaking my right shoulder. "You turn to go up."

I look at her, then slowly rise out of my chair. I stumble to the front and turn to face what is going to be my new class. All eyes are on me. There's a group at the front, and I can already tell that there the popular girls. Girls that would be perfect friends with Helena. 

"Whenever your ready." Mrs. E says to me. 

I look down at my feet. "I'm Macbeth." 

"Sorry? A little louder sweetie." Mrs. E calls from her seat.

I decide to change it. "My name is Mack. I'm 14." 

Loop and through. Under and over. Around and pull. 

Mrs. E looks at me "Tell us something about you." 

Something about me? "I am the best female archer under 15 in the West Side of Canada."

 I have been taking archery since the indecent in grade 6. Its a good way to calm my nerves. I competed in several competitions, and won the title as 'The Best Female Archer Under 15 In The Western Side of Canada'

Mrs. E looks down at a sheet on her desk. "Repeat your name please, I can't seem to find you on this list."

"Mack Choiselat" I say quietly.

Mrs. E scans the sheet. "Macbeth Choiselat?" 

I nod, still looking down at my feet.

Mrs. E claps her hands together. "Welcome to our class Macbeth" She says happily. "Any questions for Mack?"

As I guessed, no one asked anything.

Just as I am about to run back to my desk, I hear something.

"Yeah, I have a question for Mack." Someone calls from the back of the classroom. Everyone turns to face him. "Whats up with your hair?"

The class erupts with laughter. 

I start tying the rope. Loop and through. Under and over. Around and pull. This is bad. This is not what I planned. I might have an attack right now. Stay calm. Focus on the rope. Loop and through. Under and over. Around and pull. It's not working.

Suddenly I see someone stand up. Someone like me. I can tell. By the way there hands are fidgeting. By the way they stand. 

I guess after a life of being trapped in conformity, it's easy to spot others like you out. 

"I think short hair is cool." He says. 

Everyone goes silent.

 Why is someone doing this? It was someone sitting with the popular people. Why was he defending me? I try to see if I recognize him from something, but its an unfamiliar face.

Someone else stands up. "Yeah. I think it suits you." 

Why? Why are these people helping me? Defending me? 

One by one people start to stand up. Until the only person left sitting down is the one who asked the question.

It was like a scene out of a movie. Only this was real. I don't know if it's a good thing or a bad thing. Maybe neither.

Mrs. E looks just about as confused as I am. Suddenly a loud bell goes off, signaling class being over. 

Since it's the first day of school, there giving us 1 hour before our next class to make new friends, since the classes are all mixed up. I'm the only new kid in Grade 9. 

I rush out of the classroom and into the library. That whole class all just seemed like a blur. Like when I get Anxiety and you can't sort out things in your brain. I sit down in a small desk at the very corner of the library, surrounded by a sea of book shelves. I start looking at the books, when I come across my favorite book series, The Hunger Games. I pick up the three books and bring them back to my desk. 

Just as I'm about to start reading, I hear a loud slap on the desk. I look up to see the boy who asked me about my hair in class.

"What the hell was that!" He spits at me. 

Buzzing in my ears. Fog in my brain. Short breaths. Pounding heart. 

"I-I..." I start, but he cuts me off. 

"You ever make me look like a fool again, and you'll be sorry." He curses at me, then starts to walk away. "Damn you Choiselat."

I pick up my books, and run to the bathroom. I lock myself in a stall and fish my phone out of my bag. I punch in my password, and call my mom. 

"Hi Macbeth! How's your first day of school!" She asks me, happily. 

I start to choke up. "I'm not coming back."

"Whats wrong?"

"I'm not coming back!" I repeat. "Pick me up."

My mom sounds shocked. I don't know what she expected though. Did she expect me to just join into a group of friends and be happy? She knows that I will never be normal. She knows that I won't ever be able to make any friends except family friends. So why is she shocked?

"I can't do that." She says quietly. I can barley hear her over the phone.

"Why?" I exclaim. "I need to leave."

"I want you to stay. Please." She says, in a kind voice. A voice that people use when approaching a wounded animal. "Just try it for today. If you absolutely can't stand it, we'll find another option."

I wan't to leave. I need to leave. But I suddenly realize that it's not possible. I need to stay here.

I sigh, and walk out of the stall. I stop at the mirror to look at my reflection. 

I'm actually not bad looking, but I just never want to show of my looks. My wheat blonde hair and sea blue eye. I never wear any makeup and I always cover my hair with a bandanna. I take a deep breath. 

I can't escape school. I'm going to have to face it someday. I take one more look in the mirror before I leave the bathroom. I might have been cursed with Social Anxiety Disorder, but i'm going never going to be able to take it away. Might as well get used to it.