Flawsome ✔

Chapter 8 - The Floor is Lava

Monday, November 21st, 2016

I've had a bit of a rough morning, after an intense silent therapy session with Doctor Delgado. I can't believe Calo gave my parents his contact information and I can't believe he got is father to agree on seeing me right the same day, instead of having to wait for weeks until a spot opens up.

Mom forget to put towels and other stuff in the right place, and Pyper placed the clothes in the wrong spot because she was running late for her next day in suspension, sending me in a slight panic-attack.

Then it caused me a dozen attempts to get the backpack onto my shoulder the right way, and I couldn't flick the lights off because I had a different song in my mind that messed up my rhythm. It's the tune to the news that dad was watching after I left the shower. He should've been to his work by now, but since I'm constantly freaking out, he took the day of in case mom needs help to pick me up in school or whatever.

After trying to flick the lights of for about twenty times, mom knocks on my door and opens it with a worried look on her face. She seems stressed, and I'm the one to blame.

This morning isn't the only thing that is putting me on edge. It took until about two at night before I was able to go to bed, and mom kept checking on me to see if I was in bed. She didn't sleep a lot, I barely slept, and Pyper kept waking all of us up with her coughing frenzies, that started the day after I had a panic attack in the shower area. Which isn't surprising me, at all.

I'm late, and I've already giving up on going to school. I just want to go downstairs and have breakfast since I'm hungry.

"Honey, I have to go to the dentist. We have to leave in fifteen minutes, or I will be late."

"I know." I whine, feeling desperate, messing up another attempt of turning of the lights. Thank god dad connected all the necessary lights onto one switch, instead of a different switch for every light. "I can't get it right." I'm long past the stage of being calm and rational. "I have to get it right."

Mom takes in a deep breath, sadly watching me trying to tap right. "I'm calling school. You're staying home." She wipes away some tears that roll down my face.

"I want breakfast." I whisper with a hoarse voice. "I'm hungry."

"Okay." She nods, understanding I have to turn of the lights. "Let's sing together." She grabs my free hand in both her hands, humming the tune, tapping along with the rhythm. "Just listen and feel."

We both close our eyes, focusing on the tune, while I'm trying to force the thoughts of everything that will go wrong if I don't get it right to the back of my mind. I have to get it right, or there will be fire today. The lights will burn down and cause a fire. And with Pyper in a bad condition, that would lead to her not being able to leave the house in time and result in my parents losing yet another child.

And it will all be on me.

"Focus, Neo, just the song." Mom whispers with a soothing voice. In the background, Pyper's coughing sounds and dad's footsteps on the stairs send me off again, causing me to scream out in frustration. Pyper is staying home from school since she had to go home early yesterday.

"It's too loud in here! I can't concentrate! I hate this!"

"Neo, calm down, sweety." Mom pulls me in a hug, swaying me from left to right calmly. "Just close your eyes and think happy thoughts. Pyper is okay, we'll visit grandma and grandpa on Sunday. She'll bake your favourite cookies and grandpa will watch Supernatural with you." She's holding me protectively, a hand rubbing my back soothingly. "I'll call off the dentist appointment and I'll call you in sick for school. We'll go to the park, buy an ice cream and sit by the pond, feeding the ducks, okay?"