Call Me Insane (Wilford Warfstache X Reader)

Chapter 19 - Upgrade/Changes

Why so friendly, man in the mirror?
Why do you suddenly laugh?
You have beaten and twisted my arms
You have damaged and corrupted my mind
But now you smile, man in the mirror
Why do you grin at me?

I must have been spaced out for hours because by the time I was able to process reality, he was gone. 

I sit up from the bed and look around the room I was in. The same, dark filled hell hole. 

I was conflicted. I didn't know what I wanted. I rub at my arms, the faded bruises painting my skin. Was I going to become a killer like how he says I am? No...But what if I do? What if I become an Insane and follow his ways? Would it really be all that bad?

I brush at the outlines of the black and blue, biting the inside of my cheek in thought.

I could become powerful. I could have more meaning in life. What would I lose if I became a psycho? What do I have left?

Conflict. The worst part of daily life. The answer should be obvious but for some reason I am beginning to second guess myself. 

The images of Mason flash before my eyes and immediately I shudder from the thought. I don't want to be a monster. I don't want people to see me as a savage.

Yet then, it happened, a small leap in my heart jolted me forward. As my feet touch the ground I am overcome with a familiar sensation. A feeling of ecstasy runs through my veins and I gasp for air to cope with the sudden feeling of power. It begins to take over my brain, my heart. My head begins to shake rapidly as I try to push the feeling down. It felt so good but it hurt so bad. My mind was only focused on two words: Do it.

Do what?

But my question wasn't answered within me and I began to pace the room, back and forth. 

Do it. Do it. Do it.

My hands begin to shake with the heat circulating in my body. I felt so warm as if I was on the surface of the sun. It burned. It hurt. But, God, I loved it somehow.

It was like I was winning a race in last place. Like I was sweating in the Arctic. 

My vision began to blur to bright lights and my body forced oxygen out of my systems. But I loved it. I love it. 

I continue to pace, moving in the same motion. Back and forth. Back and forth. 

Do it. Do it. Do it.

Blood pumped through my veins at a rapid rate. My head was spinning. All I could hear with the beats of my speeding heart. I want to release this energy. I want to-

But suddenly it all stopped. 

Suddenly I wasn't feeling this grand enlightenment. I was standing in the middle of the room, realizing my hands were clenched in tight fists, nails tearing away at the flesh of my palm. My face hurt as if I was laughing too hard from a joke. And there was a figure in front of me, coming into focus as Wilford. The figure, walking towards me, arms behind his back.

"Congratulations."

A blurry smirk came to a clear picture. He looked entertained.

"That was your first burst. I am proud of you."

He approaches me, grabs at my chin, and looks into my eyes.

"Oh I can see the wild in you already."

I haven't seen him this excited. He looked accomplished. 

I jerk my head to remove his hand and he chuckles as his arm falls to his side.