Him

chapter 27

I walked into the hallway and immediately I spot a new but similar face. She had long blonde hair, palish, blue eyes, and thin and short ish. She was standing across my locker. With some girls.

It was Makayla. Ethans girlfriend.

But I thought she lived in California?

I walked to my locker and placed my books inside and tried to ignore the fact she might be moving and me being miserable. I didn't know the girl. I really didnt have a reason not to like her. Except she was dating a guy I loved and fucked because I didn't know the had a gf but thats not her fault. Its mine for not knowing or his for not telling. Ill just need to get over it.

I closed my locker and headed to my 1st period. Before I took a step in my direction I saw Ethan approach Makayla. She gave him a big hug and he hugged back. She kissed him passionately and he kissed back. But for some reason, in my point of view, he seemed hesitant and not really into it.

Ethans POV
Makayla, my girlfriend from Cali, decided she was going to move to Jersey so we could be together more. I was not so excited. Well not at all. I loved Ana but I'm with Makayla and I love her too. I think?

I dont even know. But when I see Ana my heart aches and I miss her. I miss her laugh, her sarcasm, her shyness. The way she bites her lip. Her Rosie cheeks. She was beautiful in her own way and I loved that about her. I couldnt get her out of my head.

But when I'm with Makayla, all I see is memories. But sometimes they are bad memories. The time I found her trying to push up on my brother. The time when I saw her texting another guy. But both times I didnt say anything. I guess since she was my first girlfriend I thought we were going to be together forever and that I loved her.

But in reality, i actually don't. But I can't hurt her. Not after she moved all this way just for me. Or maybe my brother?

Ana's POV
I lowkey watched them but looked down at my phone and leaned against my locker until the bell rang to go to 1st. Usually I go early but whats the point right?

I was scrolling through instagram when I landed on a pic of Ethan and of course, Makayla. I rolled my eyes and kept scrolling. I looked up adjusting my bag and putting my phone in my pocket, when I saw Ethan staring at me. Not really stare but like glance every 5 seconds.

His eyes eventually were glued to my figure and mine to his. Our eyes in pure contact. Not breaking. His eyes held sadness and sorrow. Hesitation and temptation.

I noticed our contact was broken when I saw Makayla look at me then at Ethan and nudge him. He looked at her and she asked him a question while looking at me. He shook his head and again fixed his eyes on me for a moment.

She looked at me and gave me a serious and questioning look. Like she was trying to figure out a problem. And I guess I was the problem.

I looked down and head to my 1st period.

***

I walked inside to a empty class. I was the first to show up. I walked to the back of the class with my head down and sat in my seat. I took out my book and pencil and got on my phone until class started.

I decided to finally check my messages that I have been recieveing since the night I found out Ethan had a girlfriend.

69 unrecieved messages:

Ethan- Ana would you please let me explain

I'm sorry... I should have told you

Me and Makayla are dating but I still love you

She cheated on me and I was going to break up with her but I didnt want to hurt her.

And I didnt want to tell you because I didnt want to hurt you... But I did and im sorry.

Please answer me...

The messages kept repeating themselves until I read the last couple of texts from this morning.

Ethan- I'm sorry... Just forget I guess. I hurt you anyways.

I love you.

I stared at the last text. "I love you." He really said that? Tears started to fill my eyes but I prevented them from falling by closing my eyes and taking a breath like E taught me. I calmed down. Then I fixed my eyes on the text above. " just forget..." Forget about us? I cant! How am I suppose to forget the guy that I truly love?

i repsonded...

Me- I love you too... Goodbye Ethan.

I pressed send and powered off my phone. I couldnt bare to see the response or read over our texts. It was too hard.

***

While in 1st period, time went by so slow. I zoned out most of the time.  It was 5 minutes until the bell rang and I felt like time was slowing down.

I sat in my seat in the back of the class and waited until 2nd. Sooner or later my thoughts we're interrupted by shuffling. I looked up and saw the students exiting I got up and packed up. While putting my book in my bag someone approached me. I looked up to find Grayson.

" hey doll face" he said with a smile. This was the last conversation i wanted. " hey." I said curtly and continued to pack up. " so look, my brother is upset." He said with concern in his eyes.

He looked sensitive. He was very overprotective of his siblings, especially Ethan. "okay..." I said signaling him to continue. " what happened between you two? He wont tell me. He said its hard to explain. " he confirmed.

I hesitated for a moment trying to find a word to describe what actually happened between us. "nothing." I said blankly. He furrowed his brows together. "Nothing?" He asked. "Yes, nothing..." I spit out silently and feeling my eyes fill up with tears.

I stood there for a moment and I threw my bag over my shoulder. I felt the tear start to escape and roll down my cheeks. "Ana are y-" he tried to say but I cut him off. "I-I have to g-go." I said with my voice beginning to crack. I pushed past him and rushed out of the room with my eyes red with tears. I wiped them with my sleeve and headed to my car.

I wanted to go home. I needed to leave. I couldn't handle the pressure.

As I was about to exit the building, I began to look for my keys in my bag and i find them. Then I bumped into someone and my keys fell.

I went to pick them up quickly and frantically and when I looked up I was faced with Ethan. My eyes that were fading from the redness of my tears began to recolor at the sight of him. My eyes began to blur and I blinked. And the tears rolled down my cheeks. "Anast-" he said but I turned around and ran down the hall and out the back door to the court.

I heard foot steps behind me but I kept running. I exited the gate and found my way back to the front of the school into the parking lot. I stood there for a moment to catch my breath.

I sat on the bench and wiped my tears. The cold air blew on my face causing my eyes to tear up more. I sat there, thinking. Pondering on whether or not I should leave.

No, I cant leave. I'll show weakness. And in this school I cant.

I walked back inside and into the bathroom. I looked in the mirror and saw my mascara was runny and my face was flushed and my eyes swollen. I fixed up my makeup and my hair. I looked at myself one last time and took a breath. I had Ethan 2nd period. But I would show that I'm alright. Even though I'm dying inside.

I walked down the hall and entered the classroom.

Don't show emotion!