not everything is rainbows.

39 // Hell

After I heard that Scott tried to kill himself, I felt a hole burrow into my stomach. He loved another girl so much that he wanted to die because he couldn't live without her. I crumbled on the sidewalk, right with Autumn. We held each other, although the memory meant different things for both of us. I eventually stood. I wiped my cheeks and straightened my dress. Everyone around us was staring. As Autumn stands, she reaches into her bag. She pulls out a small tube of cream. She chuckles through the painstaking tears and reads, "After Breakdown Miracle Medicine. The only cream that restores color and moisturizes tear soaked cheeks."
I smile as she puts a bit in my hand and I make circles around my cheeks, murmuring, "I need to get some of this.."
We laugh together as I register that she didn't hate me. She hated my title. Scott's new girlfriend.
Eventually we walk back into the club. It's not hard to find Scott. He's laying on the couch, passing a joint. He hasn't taken it to his lips, just handing it to the guy next to him. They're having a scattered conversation, but Scott seems sober. We make eye contact and he motions for me to come over but I don't. I dance on the floor with a boy that I don't know. Out of the corner of my eye, I saw Scott stare he looked mad as I jumped, smiled, and yelled with a random guy that I feel like I've seen somewhere.
As the song bled into another, the man asked, "What's your name?"
I smiled, "Rachel."
His smile dropped, "Scott's girlfriend?"
I shrugged, "I don't know what we are."
The boy ran his hands through his hair as he grabbed my hand and pulled me outside, "I'm Scott's friend, Rodney."
I gasped and ripped my hand away, "Seriously?"
He threw his hand to his side, "Hell! Do you think he saw us dancing?"
I roll my eyes, "We didn't kiss. We'll be fine."
"Well," Rodney said, "Why aren't you with him?"
I shake my head, "Too much to tell, to little time."
Rodney slid down the outside of the club. I pushed my hands against the wall and slowly let myself fall. I hit the ground and sighed as he went on, popping open a beer, "I've got time."
I pulled the beer out of his hand and took a swig. The alcohol burned my throat. As the beverage settled in my belly, I sat the bottle down and asked Rodney, "Do you know that Scott tried to kill himself?"
Rodney nodded, taking a sip. He sighed on the exhale and said, "Yeah. I was at the hospital with him. He's always been my main man."
I breathed slowly. It was a manual task. "It's just.. if he would kill himself over a girl.. maybe he's not over her."
Rodney crinkled his eyebrows, "Scott likes you a lot. Although he did try to kill himself, his girlfriend was just a contributing factor. His sister died too, you know. And his other sibling wasn't even ever there. You've met Autumn. It's just that his girlfriend set him over the edge, it's not like he would've killed himself if they would've broken up. He always told me that their was something missing, that he didn't think that girl would ever be his wife."
I swallowed a gulp of beer, "Yeah, okay.."
He sighed, "Talk to him, Rach."
I nodded, "Okay." I thought about Scott writing a suicide note. I stuck the thought to the back of my brain, "Rodney, will you tell Scott to come home? I.. I can't go back in there."
He stood up and nodded. He leant his hand out, and I took it. As I stood up, Rodney hugged me, "It's all gonna be better soon. It's better that you know the whole story that Scott would never tell you."
I shrugged, "Don't forget to tell Scott. Please, Rodney."
He nodded and I walked off. I was going home in the bitter night. I let my feet guide me to familiar landmarks until I was sitting on the sand. The diner lights illuminated the beach up. I sat against a rock and eventually I felt a presence sit beside me. I opened my teary eyes. Scott was sitting there with a face full of anger, sadness, and guilt. But under all that, he gave me looks of hope. Hope and love.

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Quick Note ; This is my first story, I hope it's not cliche or something, but so far I like it.

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song for the chapter ; im closing my eyes - potsu

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