You can Johnny my Knoxville Anyday (Johnny Knoxville Love story)

Chapter 18

Quietly I walked downstairs, I didn't want to be noticed. I'd never been so embarrassed in my entire life. I don't think I ever want to face Johnny again. I'm so ashamed of myself. How could I let everyone find out the secrets i'd tried to hard to hide. They'll all probably want nothing to do with me. I should just go and live with my mom, it'd be the best after last night's little incident. I slipped into the kitchen and poured myself a cup of coffee before trying to sneak upstairs, but failing horribly. "Miranda" I heard Bam say. I groaned loudly before turning back around and walking into the living and standing by the window. "What?" I asked snappily. "I'm so sorry about the Missy thing" he said sincerely. I looked around the room to see everyone staring at me. "Bam you're so stupid!! You couldn't have just listened to me!! Well now look at where we are! Once again she's caused a fight between us!!" I screamed at him. I was shaking in anger. "I should've left when I said I was going to. And not the other night, no the night I told all of you goodbye. I wish you wouldn't have found me Bam!! I wish you would've let me die!!" I yelled. There was still no tears. "Baby tell me what happened" Johnny said softly as he came up next to me and touched my cheek comfortingly. "Fine" I said quietly. He sat back down and I took a deep breath. "I was a problem child. I was diagnosed with being bi-polar. I also have severe social anxiety and I was bulimic. Through out school I was picked on tremendously because my dad left us for another woman and had a kid a year younger then me. Missy isn't just some bitch, she's my half sister. She made my life hell growing up. I cut and started doing drugs. I didn't overdose because of Raab, I overdosed because Missy told everyone that I had an STD and that I sucked Raab, Novak, Rake, and Dunn's dicks. The tormenting got worse and worse until one day I snapped. I was so mad that I couldn't love Raab the way he did me and that Bam picked Missy over me all those years. But there's more" I confessed. Bam was in tears and looked horrid. Johnny looked the same as he always did, like he'd do anything for me. "I got pregnant by some dude that raped me at a party. Missy told everyone that I was a slut and had no clue who the father was. All the stress caused me to miscarry." I added. All the memories killed me. My teenage years sucked that's why I tried to end them. Since I've woke up I haven't stopped thinking about Trevor, he's the baby I lost 5 years ago. "Baby" Johnny said quietly. "I totally get it if all of you hate me, I'm a fucked up mess. I'm disgusting. I hate me too" I said quietly, but still no tears fell. "Miranda do you think we could ever hate you?" Dunn asked. I shrugged and before I knew it was being kissed passionately by Johnny. "M you're great. You're the coolest girl I've ever met. We all have done stupid things, but you've got to move forward. This doesn't change anything" he said softly. "I just love all of you so much" I said as I smiled at them all. They've become my family over this time. Even before I was awake I had become attached to them. "Guys can we have some alone time?" Bam asked. The guys nodded and Bam dragged me upstairs to his room. As soon as the door was closed he ran to me and began to sob loudly. "Bam what the hell is wrong with you?" I asked in surprise. "You know what's wrong Miranda, I was supposed to be protect you.You're mom told me to keep you safe!! And I'm part of the reason 5 year of your life was taken from you!!" he yelled. "Bam it's not your fault" I said quietly as I put a hand on his shoulder. "And then I brought that bitch right back into your life and caused you even more pain!!" he yelled some more. "Bam calm down. I'm here aren't I? Bam you're the reason I'm here. Without you I'd be in a grave. You've caused me pain, but with every ounce of pain you cause there's two times the happiness because you're my best friend. You always have been. I can't say I know what it's like to think you're in love, but I'm sure that's what you were blinded by when you always forgive Missy. Bam I don't blame you for anything that happened. Either way would've made my life hell because she was jealous of what I had. Brandon I love you and nothing will ever change that" I said sincerely before hugging him tightly. His sobs became quieter as he suffocated me with a giant bear hug. "I love you too Murr and I swear I'll never hurt you again" he said into the crook of my neck. "Good now let's go back downstairs, I'm starving" I laughed as I grabbed his hand and pulled him downstairs. "Ok boys now that we have all of that out of our systems I'm going to go and get dressed and then we're going to IHOP" I announced as I skipped up to Dunn's room to change. I pulled on a pair of dark, denim skinny jeans, a gummy worm crewneck from Shelfies, and a pair of blue vans. I quickly pulled my hair into a messy bun and grabbed my oversized sunglasses before walking back downstairs. "Alright boys let's go" I said as I walked out to Johnny's car. "Hey babe give me the keys" I yelled to Johnny. "Oh hell no" he chuckled as he walked over. I stuck out my tongue at him and then smirked. I walked over and wrapped my arms around his neck and then pulled his face close to mine before kissing him passionately. "Wow" he said as we pulled apart. "Now give me the keys" I smiled as I held out my hand to him. "Yah still not happening" he smirked. "Fine have fun riding with Tremaine. I'll just drive Bam's" I smirked as I took Bam's keys out of his hands and got into the driver's seat. Bam was looking extremely excited for me to drive. I was always the main driver because I wasn't afraid to go fast. When I looked over at Johnny I saw him smiling at me as he shook his head. I blew him a kiss and honked for Bam to get in. "Are you ready?" I asked as I revved the engine. "I've been ready for 5 years" he said as we pounded our knuckles together, we're needs. "Good!!" I yelled as I sped out of his driveway. I loved going fast!!!