Broken (Sequel to Keeping Secrets)

Chapter 14.

"I, I hate you," I moaned, my lips grazing his ear.

"I hate you more," He whispered back, gently sucking the skin of my collarbone. "God, I hate you so much," There wasn't a piece of my body that was left untouched by his lips. 

"Norm," As he pressed into my body further, my high became larger. "I'm,"

"Please baby," He begged. "Please, give it to me," His voice was hoarse and full of sorrow. "Please," He cried into my neck. 

"Oh, Norm.." My body tensed and my head fell back. He kissed my jawline and began to whisper things into my ear. 

"I'm so sorry, Danielle. I know that you don't believe me, but I am. God, I hate myself everyday for all of the shit I put you through, I can't rap my head around why you still love me, why you still care for me. I've done horrible, horrible, things to you, Danielle. I'm sorry. Please tell me how I can make that up to you.." 

"I don't know." I turned my head, ignoring his hurt gaze. "What am I suppose to do..? Am I suppose to stay and trust you not to put your hands on me again? Am I suppose to help you through all of this stupid shit? Am I suppose to leave  you? Let you go through this by yourself? Norman, you and I both know that if I were to leave, I'd be back tomorrow, but if I stay, I won't ever get anywhere in life. I want to go back to school and graduate. I want to settle down and get married. I want to have babies. I want all of these things, but can you give me those? Can you make me truly happy? I love you, god, do I love you. But where's that going to get me? More sleepless nights alone without you here beside me? I know you're trying to get help, and I love you so much more for that, for actually trying this time.." I turn my face back to face his and man, do I wish I wouldn't have. 

"You're leaving me." A tear falls from his eye and lands on my cheek. Please don't do this. 

"I don't know what I'm doing, Norman. I don't know what to do. I'm playing tug of war with good and evil and I don't know what to do. I'm so tired of all the chaos that is between us, all of the tension and the games. I just-"

"Go." He whispers calmly. 

"What? I-"

"Go, Danielle." He kisses my nose and I begin to cry again. Why do I always have to cry with him? "Baby, I hate this. I hate seeing you like this. I want you to be happy. I want you to be safe, protected. Go, Danielle." I shake my head no and protest.

"That isn't what I want. I want you." My lips begin to tremble and my breath hitches. "Please, don't make me.. I don't want to.." He presses his lips to mine and nods. 

"Yes it is." 

"No! No, its not! I want to be with you, you're all I have.." He sighs and rolls off of me. He sits at the edge of the bed and places his head in his hands. 

"Danielle, this is you're decision. No one can make it for you. I won't make it for you. You need to be a big girl and figure out what you want on your own." Without looking at me, he rubs my foot and walks into the living area. I watch him through the door as he takes a seat on the couch and places his head back into his hands. I want to go sit with him, but I know he just wants to be alone. 

I need to figure this shit out. What do I want? And sane person would tell me to leave and never look back. Start a new life and move on. I want to. I want to move on, move past this, but with him. I just want him. I want my Norman. I want the man that I fell in love with. But we all know he's long gone. 

Just leave, Danielle. You and I both know its best. For both of you. He's right, you two feed off of one another, but it doesn't have to be like that. Not if you change it. Leave. Leave and don't look back. 

~

Short update, sorry. So, I have a plan, but I need you guys' help. Should I make a third one or just make this one the last? With what I have I can make a third one, but if I shouldn't, I'll just put it all in this one. lol So please comment and tell me what you think! 

I love you guys.(: