Crystal

You Could Be My Silver Springs

They spent hours together, trying to talk, to work through the issues of the last 20 years. They both wanted to be together again, but they wanted to do it right this time. They couldn't erase all the pain and the hurts from the past, but they could work through them together and to move on. It was so crazy how quickly the time passed by. They couldn't get enough of each other. They were near each other at all times. Although they hadn't officially said to anyone they were back together, which they very much were, they were not hiding it. They initially received strange looks from the rest of the band, but they didn't care. They spent almost every moment together. The days they spent talking, rehearsing, exploring the cities of the tour on days off, and their nights they spent making love...and if they had time talking, but they never had much time. They talked about everything, getting married, the possibility of them having a family. Stevie was almost 50 and knew it would be virtually impossible for her to get pregnant if all other things were not considered. She had tried to give Lindsey children before and all that resulted were the devastating losses of the children and almost Stevie. They knew Stevie could not carry a child, but maybe they could get a surrogate. They had even gone as far as to talk to a fertility specialist. It would take some work, but if Stevie were to start fertility medications it would be possible. They knew it could take a while, so Stevie started the medication. She was ecstatic that when the tour was over they would finally be able to start their life together, the life they had always wanted. Lindsey had never mentioned the younger girlfriend that he had. She wondered what she was like, if he loved her. She knew he didn't love this girlfriend more than her, but wondered if he had broken it off. If he hadn't what did that mean for them? She tried to push those thoughts out of her mind. Things were going so perfectly for she and Lindsey right now and she was afraid that if she brought it up it would put a wrench in things. Besides, if he hadn't broken it off did she really want to know the answer why?

Before the show that night she heard a knock at her dressing room door. "Come in" she yelled while putting on her makeup. Christine entered the room. She smiled at Stevie, but Stevie could sense that there was something wrong. "Everything ok Chris?" Stevie asked. Christine hesitated and then began, "Stevie, I know this is not my business, I know it has been a long time since everything happened with you and Lindsey, but what is this? What's going on? I'm worried about you. We have two weeks of shows left and I just don't want this tour to be over and things to fall apart for you." Stevie smiled, of course Chris would be worried for her, but she could definitely assure her that everything was going to work out right this time. "Oh Chris, I promise that everything is good this time! We really have worked through all of our issues. And we both love each other so much. It's like it was always supposed to be before, except we're almost fifty," she laughed. She told Christine about the talks of marriage and hopefully having a child and how she fully expected to leave this tour with Lindsey, not alone. Christine smiled and tried to be happy for her friend but she was dying inside. She saw the glow and happiness that eminated from Stevie and knew that very soon it would all come crashing down. She didn't want to see this happen to her again. She couldn't look into to those eyes again and see that joy gone and replaced with emptiness and sadness. Christine hugged Stevie and walked out, she couldn't say anything else, didn't want to see Stevie when she found out. 

Lindsey sat in his own dressing room feeling like he was in his own personal hell. Things had been going so well with Stevie. God why did he have to fuck it up again? He hated himself, hated Kristen, hated the world right now. He would rather die than to have to share this with Stevie. God what was he going to do? They were planning to get married, Stevie was preparing for them to have a family. He had finally gotten her to agree to all the things she had never wanted before and how were they going to handle this? He had never seen this coming. He had seen Kristen on and off. She was a cute girl, he liked her well enough. No one ever came close to Stevie, but she at least kept him company. Once things had begun with Stevie he had kind of forgotten about her. Not completely but usually she was a passing thought, and more of one like "I should talk to her after the tour so she knows things are over." He didn't call her, didn't answer her calls. He spent all of his time with Stevie and he wasn't going to take time away from that. So it was a complete shock that when they got to the hotel in San Fransisco, finishing up the last two weeks of the tour that she was there. He tried to listen to what she was saying, but he couldn't remove his eyes from the obvious. She was pregnant. Oh God. He didn't want this. He wanted kids but not with her! And as she is going on and on all he could think about was Stevie. About their plans. Could he convince her to not leave him? That everything would be fine? He didn't know. His mind was spinning. "Lindsey!" Kristen exclaimed. "Uhh, yeah?" Lindsey replied. He had no clue what she was talking about. "Look, I'm not blind. I've heard your radio interviews, seen clips of the concerts and television interviews. I know you are in love with her. I've always known and if I hadn't before it slaps me in the face now. All I'm asking is that maybe we try to be a family for our child. I know I can't ask you to remove her from your life." Lindsey was floored. He didn't know what to say, but he did know was she was implying. "Kristen, yes we are having a child together, and I want us to figure out a family unit, but that does not mean that we are getting married and I'm damn sure not going to treat Stevie as a mistress. Look I need some time to think. You stay here, I'll go do my show and we will talk more when I get back." She looked stunned and a little hurt. He knew she thought he would marry her. He didn't want to do that. "I wanted to see your show" she said quietly. He knew that but he couldn't risk Stevie seeing her. They still had to do the show and he knew she woudn't be able to if she knew. A knock at his door brought him back to reality. It was Mick. "Hey mate, I don't know how to tell you this but Kristen is here backstage. We need to do something with her before Stevie is ready." Lindsey groaned, "Shit! I told her not to come here! Damn it! We need to get her in here." Lindsey rushed out to bring her to his room, but not before Christine saw him with her. Their eyes met and he knew she knew. Shit. She wouldn't tell Stevie he knew. He just hoped Stevie wouldn't try to come to his dressing room.