host family II ; jack gilinsky

six

lunas pov

i sit up in my bed and take a look around. jack and i slept in different beds last night because i needed to wrap my head around everything that has been happening, and everything danny said to me last night.

i don't know what i want to do or if i even want to do it. all i do know is that ever since jack came into my life, it has been a mess.

i know danny is just worried about me and my well being, but its stressful hearing him talk about jack and constantly bringing up madison.

i don't know why i thought i could handle all of this. like i wouldn't get jealous when jack talks to madison? or when she gets brought up? or when he tells me a story and she's involved? im only human.

of course i want him to be happy, and if madison makes him happy then i guess this is the way it will be.

i never thought this would happen to me. the 'side chick', it was never my thing. i always imagined having a man that was swept away by my beauty at first glance. a man that would drop absolutely everything to be with me, at my side.

not a man who fell in love with me but also has a girlfriend back home which he refuses to break up with and won't even mention my name in front of her.

i think i need some sense to be talked into me, and i know just who to call.

+

i sit on my phone at the coffee shop while i wait for rosa to arrive. when i see her walking in i put it away and stand up to give her a hug.

"hey, how have you been?" she asks as we break away and take our seats.

"not great, thats actually why i texted you to meet me." i start, she immediately gives me her full attention and engages. "i don't know what to do about jack."

"well what do you mean? he's gorgeous, be with him." she jokes, although i don't think she was all that kidding.

"i with it were that simple. he's still with madison, and he talks to her all the time, which to be fair makes sense because he can't just forget about her automatically when he comes to see me," i say as i place my head in my hand, leaning on the table.

"and danny keeps bringing her up and asking me questions and i just don't know if i even want to be with jack anymore. since he still has madison. you know? thats never what i wanted for myself." i huff out.

"i understand luns. you used to always talk about your dream guy when we were little. your prince charming as i recall. and all i can say is, jack isn't the guy you described." she says with a sympathetic look.

i know rosa isn't trying to break us up, she's just bringing me back down to reality. i cannot be with a man who is in a committed relationship with another women. its impossible.

"you're right, im going to talk to jack later when i get home," i start again, "and im going to let him decide if he wants to stay with me, and only me, or if he wants to go back to madison, and only madison."

"woo hoo, stick it to the man sister!" she shouts. her joke made me laugh, and also made me feel proud, and powerful.

im the only one that controls my future, and im going to be okay if jack isn't in it. i just need to remember that.

+

after my much needed therapy session with rosa, i return to my apartment where i see jack waiting for me.

"hey, how was your little date with rosa?" he asks, genuinely curious. i notice he is sitting on the couch, texting someone.

probably madison.

"it, uh, it was good." i answer back as i take off my jacket and shoes, walking over to join him.

he looks up from his phone for a second to flash me a smile, showing me he acknowledged my answer and is glad.

"theres actually something i wanted to talk to you about." i state, getting more and more nervous by the second.

i can feel my heart beat pick up when he sets his phone down and looks me in my eyes, "okay, whats up baby?"

my heart immediately flutters at the pet name. i wish that stupid little word didn't mean so much to me.

"im not sure if i can kee-" i start to say before his phone starts ringing.

this seems to be a pattern for him when someone is trying to talk. we both look down and i see the name 'mads' flash across the screen.

he quickly grabs it and says, "im so sorry i have to take this, we can talk later?"

i flash a fake smile, letting him leave to go talk to madison.

"sure, what i had to say wasn't important anyways." i mutter to myself. at this point it wouldn't have mattered if he was sitting next to me, he was already in too deep in conversation with madison to even notice my presence anymore.

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im going to try to start updating regularly now since im actually enjoying where this story is going right now