taehtynsg: the most recent chat on his phone was with yoongi!
hoseok: okay so have you guys come to tell me my boyfriend is cheating on me with jimin?
jungkOok: WAIT YOU AND YOONGI ARE DATING?
taehtynsg: you didnt know???
hoseok: i mean he didn't walk in on us making out and asking to join
taehtynsg: I WAS MAKING A JOKE OH MY GOD
hoseok: STOP USING THE LORDS NAME IN VEIN
jungkOok: oh my god why is everyone gay except me and seokjin
hoseok: wait what
taehtynsg: JUNGKOOK YOU RUINED THE BIG REVEAL
taehtynsg: also i am not gay, thank you very much
jungkOok: proof?
taehtynsg: i'll fucking choke you. is that enough proof?
jungkOok: *gulps* yes
taehtynsg: NEVER DO THAT AGAIN
hoseok: taehyung: dom
taehtynsg:
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jungkOok: r/niceguys
taehtynsg: your third home
taehtynsg: FOREVER A VIRGIN!
hoseok: okay can you tell me whats up with jimin before i take a gun to my head
taehtynsg: oh yeah lol xD
jungkOok: like every other day it seened like jimin was having a mental breakdown
jungkOok: like wow does jimin actually text like this??? hes a big fat meme
hoseok: okay?
taehtynsg: UGH to make a long story short: jimins gay and wants to suck namjoon off
[ hoseok has left the chat! ]
[ —hoseok —yoongi ]
hoseok: so jimins gay??
yoongi: HOW DO YOU KNOW THAT
hoseok: taehyung and jungkook told me
yoongi: hm can you give the police an alibi when they find my dna at their murder scene?
hoseok: i think theyre at jungkooks
yoongi: youre too good to me
[ —yoongi —jungkOok —taehtynsg ]
yoongi: you fuckers better not tell anyone besides hoseok
yoongi: i wont hesitate to go the seventh level of hell just so you guys dont UGH
taehtynsg:
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[a/n oh my god i wrote this like at four in the morninggg. i realize that yoongis just been like outing jimin the whole time bUt not reallh yanno. kinda being cryptic. kinda. ]
