Hanahaki | j.hs x m.yg ✔️

//Chapter 8//

(A/n WATTPAD NEEDS TO STOP BEING A LITTLE BITCH AND START SAVING MY CHAPTERS MOSTLY WHEN IT IS A LONG(ish) CHAPTER LIKE THIS ONE. I had to rewrite this like 5 times because of Wattpad hating my existence and my book. IS mY sTorY tHaT bAd¿) 

Sadness was not the right word to describe Yoongi's feelings while he sat on the park bench, staying their for hours, scared that when he went back to his apartment Jimin would still be there, his angelic face glistening in the gold hour sunlight.

The cool wind of the slowly approaching night nipping at his pale skin. The temperature slowly dropping as did Yoongi's stability.

Yoongi was drained, emotionally and physically. The stress would not stop building up on his shoulders. It was to much to bare. He let out a choked sob as he aggressively sniffed to stop the tears.

The male was falling apart by the second and was soon crying uncontrollably mumbling incoherent insults to himself.

All he wanted was to be comforted. His entire body was screaming for Hoseok. He knew Hoseok would come, or at least he was somewhat sure. After what happened he wasn't even sure he would talk to Hoseok anymore.

Yoongi thoughts brought him to all of his previous relationships and their somewhat tragic endings. Who was there to hold him as he cried?  Hoseok was. Who was the one who helped him find a new partner just to see him
smile? Hoseok.

Hoseok would do anything for Yoongi and he never really noticed, he took it for advantage. Yoongi never thought of a life without hoseok, they where life long friends, and he thought it would stay that way, forever.

But look where that got him.

Here.

He never even thought, in his wildest dreams that he would hurt Hoseok. But he did. He was disgusted in himself, of what he had done to Hosoek. He scoffed at himself as he wiped the remaining tears from his face and tried to somewhat make himself look presentable

After a couple more minutes of sitting there. Yoongi got up slowly as he finally let all of his thoughts set in. All he could be now after he thought about it was angry. He never loved Jimin. He loved the thought of him. He loved what he thought Jimin was.

Yoongi clenched his hands. His eyes going dark as he walked onto the sidewalk that ran through the small deserted park. His mind was clouded with anger. He thought of all of the times he treated Jimin, buying him clothes, taking him out, and just loving him, with all of his heart.

Jimin was Yoongi's gold, his own star and boy, did he treat him like it. Jimin was spoiled, but Yoongi never received any type of thank you, except for sex, but was that really what he wanted? No. All he wanted was verbal recognition, that why he didn't stop spoiling Jimin when he would not thank him, Yoongi just kept doing it because he wanted nothing more to make Jimin happy, but with out a thank you he felt Jimin wasn't happy. Now he realized how selfish Jimin was and how blinded he was by love.

Well they do say that love makes you do stupid things.

Yoongi's anger did not cool down as he entered his apartment as when he did he saw a small neon sticky note stuck to the small table located in the middle of the kitchen. The note read "I'm sorry" just that nothing else and to Yoongi's astonishment, no sign of Jimin, nonetheless he wasn't mad with how Jimin left without a trace, especially under the stress he was under with the unknown time limit.

Yet still there was that burning anger deep inside of him, mostly directed at Jimin, he stormed into his room and ripped the sheets off. He couldn't stand sleeping in the bed with it smelling like Jimin.

With rage coursing through his veins he tugged his backpack off his shoulder and threw it onto his bed. His hurriedly ripped out the contents of his backpack. His laptop, notebook, headphones and pens now messily sprawled across his now stripped bed.

He quickly flopped onto his bed, grabbing for his notebook and furiously opening it to a random blank page. He started to scribble words down. The real emotion he had while writing, made him write faster and with more passion. He was already planning out the style and beat of the song.

Yoongi kept writing, it was about 2:40 am when he fell asleep on top of his laptop, having written two songs, he had the drafts done for both. He was definitely not excited for the work day ahead of him and how long he would be able to stand the tension between him and Hoseok.
——
Here are the two songs Yoongi wrote.

-i miss the old u, blackbear-this song is the song that was fueled by Yoongi's anger, he lashed out with harsh words and rude comments, but that's what anger does to people.

-feelings fade, Gnash- now this song was fueled by Yoongi's sadness and it's obvious that he really loved Jimin, and had somewhat of an emotional dependency on him, but now that Jimin is gone he isn't really sure he will be ok.

(A/n ok yeah this chapter isn't the best, I kinda just pulled most of it out of my ass cuz I've been salty at Wattpad for deleting my stuff, anyway, this is random but I'm getting a hamster soon, would you want to see a book on them? Just curious. Hope you have a wonderful day And tysm for so many reads I thought this book would only get like 100 or something! Love you!💗💖💞)