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"When does the mother arrive?" Arden asks, placing her drink on the table in between us.
"We're meeting tomorrow for lunch," I say with feigned enthusiasm. "I hope we'll be going somewhere good at least. She's picking so it can go either way really."
"Do you want us to come with?" Emma asks, her face resting in her hands, elbows propped up on the table.
"No," I sigh. "I haven't seen her since Christmas last year so I need to go alone."
"Does she know about Calum?"
"Are you crazy?" I sip on my ice tea. "She would rip him to shreds. He'd dump me in a second."
"Come on, it can't be that bad," Arden tries to comfort me.
"Since my mother wasn't picky enough with the men in her own life, she doesn't find any guy good enough for me. Imagine my pickiness but just extremely magnified."
"Isn't Calum kind of a mother's dream though?"
"One mother's dream is my mother's nightmare."
"Has she told you about her senior prom?"
"No, what happened?"
"My mom made my date cry and I ended up going alone." Arden bursts out laughing along with Emma.
"That's awful!"
"Embarrassing is what it was." I decide to change the subject off of me and my embarrassing mother and turn it to Arden instead. "What's going on with you and Ashton?"
"We hit it off at the party," she says. "But we've only seen each other once since then and it's been two weeks."
"That sucks."
"Yeah, but I get it," she sighs. "I mean between work and the whole him and Calum trying to open their own restaurant thing—he did tell me he'll be kinda busy."
"Wait, Calum is trying to open his own place?"
"Yeah!" Arden beams. "He didn't tell you?"
"No, he didn't."
"No, no, no," Emma starts. "I can see your thoughts battling in your head. You are not going to go off on this minor thing."
"Minor? He's trying to create his own business."
"Maybe he just forgot to tell you."
"Arden, you've known Ashton for what, five minutes, and he's already told you," I reason. "Calum is probably growing tired of me."
"Stop over analyzing."
"I can't," I groan. "It's a curse."
...
I gulp when I realize that my mother is leading me into the restaurant where Calum works for lunch. I motion for Luke not no act as if he knows me and his smile drops, but nonetheless he plays along and shows us to our table.
"I read the October issue," is the first thing she says once we have been seated. "I see from your column that you are still hopping between men who constantly find new ways to disappoint you."
"Mom, do we really have to talk about this?"
"Absolutely. Do you think it's fun for me as your mother to see that my daughter is left in an ocean of unreliable men?"
"Mom," I whine.
"I still think you should go for a woman."
"Mom!" I exclaim, earning a few looks. She doesn't seem bothered.
"You're still friends with that Emma girl, aren't you? She's nice, why don't the two of you give it a go?"
"Because neither one of us is gay, mother," I tell her and she rolls her eyes.
"It's a shame, really. You could be happy."
"I am happy."
"Oh, honey, you're miserable." I am about to rebut but I see Calum in his waiter's uniform walking towards out table looking confused.
"I need to use the restroom," I tell my mother and quickly stand up. I hurry to reach Calum and practically drag him with me into the kitchen.
"Hey, what the hell is going on?" he laughs. "Why the rush?"
"I'm having lunch with my mother," I tell him and his eyes light up. "She cannot see you."
I hate the disappointed look which takes over his face. "Why not?"
"Because you won't think I'm worth it after you meet her. She'll start picking on your waiter job and anything else she can come up with—basically as long as you have a penis it's a no from her."
"Hey, calm down, Scotty," he lulls me. "I want to meet your family. I'm sad that you won't be able to meet my parents but it would mean a lot for me to meet yours."
"I really want you to," I assure him. "But not now, not today. I like you too much to let her ruin this."
"Fine," he huffs. "But I don't agree with it."
"That's all right with me," I smile, but it's wiped off quickly. "Why didn't you tell me you're opening your own restaurant?"
"I was going to," he says. "But I just wanted to make sure it's actually happening before I did."
"Hey." I take his face in my hands. "It's going to be great. Anything you do will be amazing."
"Thanks." He leans down and pecks my lips. "You better get back to your mom. I'll send another waiter."
"Thank you."
"Don't even worry about it."
I rush back out to sit back down with my mother who is looking more displeased than she did when I left her. "The service here is terrible. Where are all of their waiters?"
