Aren't you happy for me?

6) It's your birthday in 5 days

"So, how was it yesterday?" Ant asked when he had picked up the phone.

"This club is nice, you should've come with us" Dec smiled.

"Nah, I was tired and you two-" Ant began but was cut off by Declan.

"Stop saying that we need time alone, we have plenty of that when we aren't out and about" Dec quickly said. "Is it because you do feel uncomfortable after all?" he then asked carefully.

"What do you mean?" Ant asked and sighed.

"Well, because you haven't got someone" Dec said quietly. "I thought, maybe... maybe it reminds you of that."

"No Decky, it's not that..." Ant sighed. "I really was just tired, okay? And we can go there another time together, okay?"

"Okay" Dec said and Ant knew Dec wanted to say so much more, but Dec sensed that he didn't want to talk about it, so he let it be. Ant knew how to guide a conversation in the way he wanted to, especially with Dec.

"So, it's your birthday in 5 days, what do you want to do?" Ant asked to change the subject. They always did something special on the other's birthday.

Last time, Ant had taken Dec to see his favourite musical in the West End. Dec had been over the moon, also because he knew Ant hated musicals, so it had meant a lot. Dec on the other hand had taken Ant to a butchery course, although he was extremely squeamish himself. But it had been the best present Ant had gotten that year.

"Oh... yeah, about that... err... actually, Stephen said he'd take me away for the weekend" Dec stuttered.

"Oh, that's... err... nice" Ant said quickly. He knew Dec had a bad conscience. They hadn't spent one birthday apart since they knew each other and Ant knew Dec well enough to know that he felt bad about it.

"Hey, that's alright" Ant said. "He is your boyfriend, he should do stuff like that for you."

"Yeah" Dec smiled and Ant could sense that he was a bit relieved that Ant wasn't angry. "It's just... We haven't spent a birthday apart and I think it will be weird somehow. Maybe I could ask Stephen where we are going and you could come t-"

"Oh God, Decky, that would be weird" Ant laughed to ease the tension and he was happy that Dec laughed along.

"Guess so" Dec said. "But we can do something together once I am back. Maybe on Monday evening? We could go to the cinema, this film is on you wanted to see."

"Dec, it's your birthday" Ant grinned. "And you don't have to make up for it, it's alright. I am happy that he treats you and that. And aye, we can do something on Monday, but something you want to do. How about we go out for dinner? To this Italian place? You wanted to go there for a while now, didn't you?"

"Yeah... Actually..." Dec started and sighed again.

"Oh, Stephen has taken you there already, hasn't he? Silly me, of course he has" Ant said and chuckled. His heart ached badly but of course he didn't want to show it to Dec.

"Yeah, sorry" Dec said coyly and Ant's heart melted. He didn't want his best friend to be sad about it.

"Okay, listen. How about you just come over, we talk and watch a bit of footie, maybe the game you'll miss on your trip? How about that?" Ant tried again.

"Ace" Dec beamed and Ant smiled. He knew that Stephen wasn't into football at all, so it was the one thing where he could still have Dec to himself.

"Good, see" Ant smiled. "Everything is fine. You have a nice weekend, okay? Love you, Decky."

"Love you too" Dec said and Ant could sense that Dec really was relieved.

When they had hung up, Ant sighed loudly and sank into his chair again. He was a bit sad that Stephen now did all the things he used to do with Dec. He took him away on his birthday, the one day where Ant had always felt even closer to Dec than anyways and he had even taken him to the restaurant Dec had talked about going with Ant for months now.

Ant felt incredibly lonely in that moment. He knew Stephen was treating Dec well and it made it so much harder for him. Stephen was good to Dec and even took him on trips and to posh restaurants. Something Ant had always done in the past for Dec.

What could he give his best friend now that he had a boyfriend who did all those things?

He took the present he had bought for Dec out of the drawer beside him and watched it in his hands. He had it for quite a while now and tears filled up his eyes when memories of them flashed before his mind.

Memories of him hugging Dec, throwing him through the air, cheering the Toon on, memories of Dec smiling at him with this gorgeous smile and his warm eyes. Ant clutched the item in his hand and let the tears drop.

Again, he wasn't sure for how much longer he was able to take this. To pretend that everything was fine. To spend time with Dec without thinking how much it hurt that he would go back and straight into Stephen's arms.

But once again he thought it was this or nothing at all. And he loved his Dec and he didn't want to lose him.