The Half Smile

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A few days past and I woke up to the sound of Allen crying at 5:00 am. I rolled out of bed and shuffled into the nursery and picked up Allen. Like every morning, I sat in the rocking chair and listened to Allen as he sucked the milk out of my breast. A few moments later, Finn walked in, in his boxers and said "Good morning, babe." He walked over and stroked Allen's head and kissed mine. "Morning," I said. It was the morning before Finn's departure. In less than 36 hours, we would be leaving for the airport to watch my husband leave us for a whole year. Finn walked over to his closet and picked out an outfit for Allen. Surprisingly, he had picked out an outfit that actually looked cute, and consisted of a light blue hat and sneakers. When I finished feeding and burping Allen, Finn changed him into his clothes as I got ready for the day. I went downstairs and made two bagels for Finn and me. The three of us decided to eat breakfast together and I had gotten today and tomorrow off, with the knowledge that Finn was soon, leaving. There wasn't much talk during breakfast, however, between each of our bites we would give one another one of those smirks with glimmering eyes that said "I'm turned on. Are you turned on?" He was turned on. I could tell. We decided to spend the day at home. We kept it low key and spent every moment together. We had a picnic for lunch in Central Park together and we got to watch Allen's face as he was mesmerized by the passing birds. We had a dinner that I cooked in the kitchen and watched a lovely movie, that I would say, isn't appropriate for a four month. Then again, what is? After the movie, we put Allen in his crib together and Finn and I sang a duet to get him to sleep. After the song, Finn gave me that turned on half smile again and grabbed my hand and took me into our bedroom.

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