Save Me| Yoonmin

13) The Lies I Tell For You

Just a little note! This is again Yoongi's point of view. Also, this "scene" takes place before Taekook, Namjin, and Hoseok show up to the hospital. Basically, it's before Yoongi calls Hoseok. Hope that made sense. Read on!
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"Hyung...we need to talk."

I sighed and nodded my head, knowing what this was already going to be about. This moment was meant to come and I knew it the moment Jimin and I fought in the music room. It wasn't a matter of if, but a matter of when.

"Hyung, I think we need to spilt up."

I knew those words were coming but it still hurt hearing them. Jimin was my world. To be honest, I don't want to leave him. But if this is what Jimin wants then, I'll lie.

"I know. I've been thinking about it for a while. I realized I was never in love with you. I was just in love with the feeling. The feeling of having something that I didn't need."

Jimin's face sadden.

"That's a lie, isn't it?"

I nodded my head slowly. Of course it was a lie. I loved Jimin. I still do even while we're having this conversation.

"I love you. I rarely know what I want and act before I think. But in this lifetime of rushed decisions, wrong turns, and spectacular messes, you were the first thing that felt right."

Jimin gave me a slight smile and took a deep breathe.

"We were always meant to say goodbye, weren't we?"

I looked away, tears threatening to fall.

"Yeah. I think so."

"I loved you though. I loved you so much, Hyung."

There's that word. "Loved". Not "love". But "loved".

"I know. I did too."

There was a painful silence that lingered around the room. I think both of us were afraid. Afraid of want would happen once I felt this room.

"Do you regret loving me?"

Honestly, I don't know why I asked him that. I wasn't really expecting a response either. But Jimin smiled weakly and shook his head.

"No, the only thing I regret is begging you to stay when I knew we were wrong for each other."

It hurts. It hurt, knowing that the guy I love is lying. Of course Jimin was lying. It was true that we were wrong for each other. But those wrong things actually made us right for each other. See the thing is, I know he wants to be with me. But he is afraid that I will hurt him. So he's hurting me first.

"You know, that night at your house, you hugged me and whispered that you loved me. And I was so thankful that you couldn't see my face when I realized I couldn't say it back."

I did notice that. I said I loved him, but in return he thanked me. I knew he couldn't say it back. But just the feeling of him in my arms was good enough for me.

"I'm sorry. I never meant to hurt you, Jiminie."

I looked into his eyes. They were a beautiful, innocent shade of brown. But when I looked deeper, I saw a reflection of my own. They were broken, lost, and confused. We both thought that we needed each other, that what we thought we had was perfect. But in reality, we torn each other apart. We were just broken pieces, shattered by false hopes and dreams.

I gave Jimin a big, gummy smile even if it was a fake smile. Watching him blush made my heart hurt.

"Do you mind?" Jimin said, jokingly.

"I can't help it. You're just so perfect."

Jimin blushed again and shrugged his shoulders.

"I'm far from it."

I frowned at his comment.

"I hate it when you think of yourself as nothing. You're so beautiful and amazing. You may not be perfect to someone else, or even to yourself, but you're perfect to me."

I don't know why I said that. The purpose of all my lying was to make it seem like I didn't love him. Even if it was a lie. Even if we were destined to fail, I'll always remember the way I used to look at Jimin. He was my whole world, and I could never get him out of my mind. Funny how one person can go from your whole world to just a strange in a few hours. But in reality, he won't be a stranger to me. He'll still probably want to be friends and I'm okay with that. But I think there'll always be a part of me that loves Jimin.

"So, we'll still be friends, right?"

It hurt hearing him say that although I knew it was coming. But I smiled a big smile and nodded my head.

"Of course! I wouldn't have it any other way!"

Lies.

"Alright well. I need to go call Hoseok. He has my phone."

Jimin chuckled.

"Alright Hyung. Hoseok-Hyung can come to visit if he wants to!"

I smiled. I kept that smile as I left the room but as soon as Jimin couldn't see me, I fell to the room and cried, helplessly. I didn't care about the stares I was getting from the strangers walking past me. Jimin was officially gone.

I eventually found a phone and called Hoseok, who was on his way. After a while, the five of my best friends were standing before me, hugging me and telling me useless words. Nothing mattered right now. I felt numb.

Jungkook and Taehyung went into Jimin's room and I heard screams and laughter right after. Jin and Namjoon went too shortly after, followed by more laughter.

Fuck, Jimin. Why couldn't I be the one to make you laugh like that?

"Aren't you gonna go in too?"

There's my childhood friend, always knowing that there's something wrong with me.

"Hoseok...we broke up."
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Updating from my best friend's closet✌🏼
Hope you enjoyed this chapter and I might update again today if I have time. VOTE COMMENT AND ALL THAT JAZZ!!!💜💜🦋