Not Alone

LOST

I put a song if you want to be in the mood of pain hahaha

PDV Elise***

A week after***

Im looking at the ceiling, Im crying and I did not stop crying. I am destroyed, broken in two.

I dont want to speak.. to nobody, I dont want to respond to any messages.. of nobody, I want to be alone, taken by my own broken heart. I'm in pain and I dont know what to do, I dont know where to go, I dont know who to see, who to speak.

My tears link one by one. I'm afraid of being alone, I'm afraid of being who I am now. How to find happiness after that? How to be strong after that? How to manage the misery of being destroyed. The depression, the treason that invaded me from head to toe. I am not able to look at myself in the mirror, I can't stop thinking about it. I love her, I hate her. I'm worried, I dont want to. I dont have anyone but everyone wants to be there for me. I hear my phone ringing, I try not to hear it anymore. I want to scream, but I have already screamed too much. Who am I? Who am I without her? To be happy, I lost the capacity. I am so broken. I want to get repaired, but how? My door does not stop being knocked by those who want me to come out of my house.

Her smell is everywhere, what she left at home is always at the same place. Her actions in the morning, her routine that she brings home. The happiness that I get from her arrival, the wisdom she gives me, the confidence I have with her, the apartness that I feel. The smile I have when she looks at me, the joy I feel when she holds me in her arms, the feeling of being at home everywhere she brings me, the love she gives me, the love I miss it, the love that makes me live.

E- Im.. Im broke..

E- who am I ?

My tears again and again. I want everything broken in my field of vision

E- I can't..

I get up and scream!

E- AHHHHHHHHH FUCK WHY! why why me..

I get up with rage!

My two little tables, I take them to throw them. The vase she gives me, I take it to throw on my mirror that breaks with the vase. The decorations that I have, I destroy them! the chairs, I throw them. I scream, I cry, I hurt myself with all the glass on the floor. I am crazy about everything, I am destroying, I am angry, I am disappointed, I am destroyed and finished.

I dont recognize my house, I dont recognize myself.

E- I cant move

I have to stop otherwise I will die of my pain.

I take my phone and call the first I see in my contacts on the spot.

***- Hello?

I start crying just to hear his voice.

E- Can you come..

***- Elise.. what happen??

E- come please.. I cant move

***- Ill be there in 20 minutes.. stay where you are, dont move..

He hangs up and I continue to cry under the effect of panic. There is a lot of blood on the ground .. I'm scared.

.

He comes in by breaking the door. His eyes change, he's lost, anxious to see me on the ground in tears. He's not moving. But finally, he moves.

He pushes everything he finds on the ground to get to me.

***- Elise why.. why.. what

He can't talk.

E- she cheated on me.

His face is destroyed by looking at me. Hes saying anything, he takes me in his arms, letting me cry. When he put me on my bed, I see that hes going to take something to wipe away my tears. He says nothing yet. But he knows what I need and he knows what to do.

***- You are strong.. dont cry..

E- Justin I dont know what to do.

Justin- Nothing.. nothing for now you need to sleep.. eat.. and Im staying tonight.. Im staying until you get better..

PDV Natasha***

NO I can not be what I think I am. I can not be a monster, I already am! I can not be that !! It does not even exist! No no! It's done twice! and I always feel strength coming up as soon as my anger gets into my head. I can not be that. I am not a monster. How?

I become a monster, I become a betrayal, a bad person. I am a vampire destroyed by love and by my mistakes.

N- Im a vampire

I look in the mirror, my fangs appear in front of the blood of my fifth victim. Who am I? Am I the only one? I am ashamed. I dont want to go out anymore .. I have to isolate myself, otherwise I kill.

I had so much difficulty to wrote the part of Elise.. Im related of her pain..

hahaha When the creator is crying too

AND Natasha is a vampire in real life too!! Thats gonna be something to look at ..

-Gab