Me, Mom with(out) Daddy (COMPLETE- ENGLISH)

36. Nathan's Letter

Ariella Grace

*flashback*

I open the box and there are my letter that I wrote seven years ago.. my old phone.. and letter from him.. I could see the big red rose bouquet that lying on my bed. This rose is so beautiful.. He always remember my favorite flowers. I touched the roses and take the box on my lap.

I take my old phone... I don't remember when or  where I lost this phone. I smile and turn it on.

I could see the photo of me and him that I put as a wallpaper before. Then after awhile there's so many voice message came up on the screen of my old phone.. I could said All the messages was from Nathan. I see the last message was six years ago..

I push the button to hear what message that he sent to me before. I heard the last message that he sent to me

"Hei... I saw you today.. you looks beautiful.. I also see you holding your baby.. You know.. after you left, I've never feel alive anymore but today when I see you holding your baby with your man there.. holding all the stuff from the supermarket... I've death a thousand death.. so this is the reason that you left me? Why Ella?  I tried not to believe when I knew that you already have your own family and there's another man in your new life, but I see it by myself.. so this is maybe the last message that I've sent to you... Have a happily life Ella.. Goodbye."

I wipe my tears that escape from my eyes. I just remember when Nathan said that he thought that Ronald was my husband. I smile a bit while the memory came in.

I heard another message again.

"Hey My Ella, It's your birthday today... happy birthday baby... I love you... I love you so much... and I don't know how to stop it... Please came back to me when you hear this message.."

I smile and keep listening another voice message.

"Ella.. It's been 365 days since you left me... where are you baby? please came back to me... I need you... I really need you... Please...I don't wanna live in the world when there isn't you there.. please baby... talk to me.."

"Ella... I love you without knowing how, when or where baby... I love you simply without any problems, pride or reason. I love you with my way cause I don't know any other way of loving you.. but I love you as you are.. you're always be my Ella."

I cried and sobbing beside my bed. My heart so hurts right now... If only I didn't walk away from him. I never knew he's looking for me after years. I put the phone and took a little box. I open it and see the beautiful ring was in there. I take it and see two words engraved in the band inside.

Nathan's mine.

I smile and cry at the same times. I closed my mouth and start sobbing. Nath....

Why this should happen with us?  I wanna be with you... only you...

I hold the ring tightly and wipe my tears. I could see another letter beside my letter. I open the letter and see his handwritting.

Dear Ariella...

I don't know where to start but I don't have any nerve to meet you directly..

Forgive me.. cause I'm leaving without meet you and talk to you before..

I don't know how should I do when I meet you after what happened tonight..

I wish I could take you away in that moment.. but I know I can't..

I was there.. I know you know I was there..

Even I can't describe to you how I feel right now..

I'm just lost..

I always thinking to find my way back home but the moment when we first meet after seven years apart. I've just realized that you're my home..

I still thinking about what can I do to turn back the time and take me back at the time when we were together. If only I can do that, I will never ever let you go.. even you wanna walk away from me, I will never let it happen for us.

Do you remember the moment when we first met, I said to you before that you gave me such a strange feeling. Now I know that strange feeling that I've never been felt with anyone is love. And It's you.. it's always be you and only you

I don't know what will happen in the further but let me be a good father for our daughter.

I'm not sure of what I'm gonna said about this while I haven't no more chance to make you be mine again.. but all I want to say is.. You will always be the one for me..You're always be all I want and I love you Ella..

I'm happy for you Ella..

Your Nath.

No... This isn't like that Nath..