Better Off This Way: Eren Jaeger x Reader [MODERN]

~Chapter 9~

"Here, take this." Mikasa said, shoving a paper bag full of groceries into my arms.
"I'll grab the rest and meet you in the house." She added.
I stumbled into the house, struggling but managing to heave the heavy bag onto the counter.
"Hey, I'm home." I say, kicking off my shoes and walking through the house.
"Um, hello?" I call out once again after receiving no response.
Where is that kid?
Whatever, he's not here to bother me so can I really complain?
I head to my room to put my books and my bag away.
Upon entering my room, I notice my window is.... Open?
"What the hell?" I mutter to myself.
Walking over with unease, I shut the window.
That was weir-
"AAAH!" I yell, feeling a pair of arms wrap around my torso and my neck from behind.
Unfortunate enough for this asshole, I grew up with Levi.
I quickly duck and hunch forward, using all my mite to throw the person from behind, over me.
I rush over to cause some damage to the guy, until he takes off the ski mask he had covering his head.
"Don't attack, it's just me, Eren!" He covers his face, realizing I was about to plant my foot into it.
"Eren?! What the hell man?!" I scoff, extending out my arm to help him up.
He shoos it away and helps himself to a stance.
"I was pranking you, agh. Jeez!" "Ohohohoh, Eren. Poor, sweet, naive Eren. I will SO get you back for this." I chuckled maniacally.
"Really? Cause- last time you acted on that you got a face full of Mikasa's fist." Eren snickered.
"I WILL GET YOU BACK JAEGER." I said, slowly backing into the darkness of my closet, stumbling on the mess within.
"Ow!- erm- I mean- Not an exit, that's my closet." I saw awkwardly returning to the light.
"Okay well, anyways. Where'd you learn to do that? For a frail girl you sure are strong." He grumbled, dusting himself off.
"My brother taught me how to kick ass." I smirk a bit, grooving my head. Also realizing Eren's precious little prank backfired.
"I'm unsurprised." Eren chuckles.
"So-"
"Oh! By the way, Your sis is here to look after your sorry broke ass. She's gonna make us some food with the groceries she bought us." I say in a snob tone.
Eren's face instantly turned red.
I stepped back cautiously.
"Hey man I was just jo-"
"What?! Ugh, I can look after myself! I'm not a kid anymore, I can make my own damned food." He muttered angrily as he stormed past me.
I scurried after him into the kitchen, to find Mikasa already putting away some of the groceries.
"I WILL have you KNOW, that I am a GROWN. MAN. I do NOT need to be BABIED by YOU-"
"You're a grown BROKE ass man with zero dollars in your bank account, genius." Mikasa said flatly.
"HOW DID YOU- Oh- did you hack into my account again? MIKASA I SWEAR TO GOD-"
"So, Madeline's cleaning out your gullible ass, hm? You sorry pushover." Mikasa scoffed.
"S-should I be here- for this?" I mumbled under my breath.
"No! Go!" Eren pointed me to my room.
Mikasa pointed her finger to her side
"No, stay!" She said.
Eren began clapping his hands. "Nope, no! Bad girl, get out of here! Go!" Eren said, trying to scare me off like a lost puppy.
I began to leave hesitantly, glancing at Mikasa.
"No, no no. It's okay! Good girl, stay! Come on, come on." Mikasa's voice became somewhat soft.
"Bad girl! Bad girl!" Eren began spraying me with Leo's pray bottle, drenching my outfit.
"EUGH! Fuck my life!" I cried.
"It's okay, come here." Mikasa said gently, clapping me towards her side.
I quickly ran to her, cowering beside her.
Eren dramatically grasped the bridge of his nose trying to gather himself with a sigh.
"Okay- my life's a little complicated right now, I will admit it. BUT I'm WORKING on it. I'm gonna get a few more hours at work, and EVERYTHING will be FINE." Eren huffs.
"EVERYTHING will NOT be fine, MADELINE will just think of MORE THINGS that she WANTS." Mikasa retorted.
"She- has- she's- S-SHE HAS GOOD QUALITIES." Eren stuttered.
Mikasa leaned over towards me.
"See? What did I tell ya, stutters when he's clueless." She muttered.
"I can HEAR YOU." Eren growls.
"You know what?! Fuck this. Are you hungry?" Mikasa asks.
"I!- I!-" Eren starts angrily.
"I.... am actually starving right now." Eren plants himself into one of the counter chairs with crossed arms and an irritated pout.
Mikasa pulls out a cucumber and a terrifying army knife.
"Great." She smiles in a motherly manor.
The tension in the room was so strong that I slowly lowered myself to the floor, like that of a lion's prey, attempting to hide in the long grass of the African savanna.
"You're a weird chick." Eren chuckled, his voice was calmer now.
"He's not wrong." Mikasa added, placing a cutting board on the counter.
I nonchalantly, playfully and gracefully lifted myself up, then placing myself atop the counter.
I whipped my hair elegantly, or so I thought.
"So what's for food?" I say cooly.
"Is that even a sentence?" Eren raised his eyebrow.
"Mikasa's famous club house country sandwiches." She replied.
"Oh, is that good?" I turned to Eren.
"They're actually delicious." He grumbled irritably.
Mikasa quickly chopped up the cucumber in seconds, then twisting down into a martial arts stance only to flip out two frying pans, one onto each counter. Then twisting her arm back to take hold of the knife, slicing a chunk of butter into the air, then flipping the knife into her opposite hand to slice another chunk of butter in mid air. One chunk landing in each frying pan.
"Bacon." She extended her arm.
"Ugh." Eren groaned, twisting himself up from the chair in less than a second, opening the fridge and tossing bacon behind himself over his shoulder to Mikasa who instantly caught it only to extend her second arm.
"Eggs." She said.
I covered my eyes only to peak through the cracks of my fingers as Eren tossed several eggs towards her which she seemed to catch between her fingers.
Only to run a train of fingers across the pans edge, perfectly cracking the eggs into the pan. Not a single shell present within.
"Heads up!" Eren shouted, tossing the lettuce towards her which she caught on the blade of her hunting knife, which she then slung onto the cutting board and proceeded to slice evenly one handed.
"Uh, what's going on- here?" I question pointing back and forth between them repeatedly.
"We're making a snack. Duh." Eren smirked.
"But.. where- did- you- guys learn howta- cook like- this?" I question, dumbfounded.
"We grew up in military camps. We're basically fully trained cadets." Mikasa answered simply.
"And in one of the infantry divisions, cooking duty was a punishment. But we made it our own." She shrugged, returning to what she was previously doing.
"Uh- what?" I grabbed my temples, attempting to wrap myself around the moment.
"What kind of military- do- is this- does this? What is this?" I said gesturing to all of what had just happened.
They both turned and faced me seriously.
"Advanced division." They said, practically in unison.
I buried my face into my hands as well as the counter top.
"THAT'S why you fight like ninjas... ooaaaakkkaayyy." I smiled at them, lifting myself up.
"Wait! Your friends?-"
"We all grew up in the same division."
Eren answered my question.
".... OHHHHH! And Madeline?" I ask, my jaw partially dropping.
They both bursted out into laughter.
"No. She's new to the crew." Mikasa then said flatly, rolling her eyes towards Eren.
"Wait! Am I having a lucid dream?"
I pinched myself.
"This is real life, right?"
Mikasa tilted her head sticking the knife between her teeth.
"She's like a little puppy in the window of a pet store." She said to Eren.
"She's kinda cute." Eren replied.
"Okay Eren, they're ready." Mikasa said sliding a plate towards Eren and myself.
"I got this." Eren said reaching into a cabinet.
"I've been meaning to hang this on the wall. Just haven't found a spot for it." He said, producing a highly decorated samurai sword within its sheath.
He quickly unsheathed the sword.
I shrieked as he lifted the sword above his head and swung it towards me, I quickly closed my eyes and shielded my face with my arms.
"You Okay?" Eren asked cooly.
I slowly opened my eyes and let down my guard.
The sandwich in front of me was perfectly sliced in half.
Mikasa examined it.
"You're getting better at that." She stated, nudging Eren.
He rolled his eyes.
This is definitely gonna take some getting used to.