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*Alexis' pov*

Ever since Corbyn dragged me out of the pool he hasn't spoken to me. Harry is silent because losing mum has finally hit him. Jack doesn't talk to me since I threw my fit and Zach, Adalyn and Jonah are never home. I've been very distant from social media and people are starting to notice. I grab my phone and sit at my desk in my room. I set my phone up and go onto Instagram starting a live. Immediately people start pouring in asking what's been happening and why I've been so silent.
"Hey guys" I smile tightly and people comment on my smile and my voice and the bags under my eyes.
I look around my room making sure my door is locked and that no one is around before looking at the phone.
Don't cry Alexis. No matter what.
I take a shaky breath and bite my lip.
"Okay uh, so the last few weeks have been chaotic and that's why I've been away from Instagram, Twitter and Snapchat and even my YouTube channel. I'm not ready to talk about it to everyone yet but..." tear fill my eyes and then Corbyn joins my live.

user1 : OMG CORBYN!
user2 : she is about to cry!! It's okay Alexis take a deep breath we all love you!

A tear slides down my cheek as I try to word the sentence correctly.
"I'm all alone" I whisper and wipe the tear off my cheek
"No one talks to me now and I have no one to talk to. Harry doesn't even talk to me" I whimper and put my face in my hands
I quickly compose myself and sit up taking a shaky breath
"Corbyn, Daniel, Zach, Jack and Jonah don't talk to me, not even Adalyn but I understand why" I wipe a stray tear away and comments continue to pour through at a speed that I couldn't read.
"Don't go and attack them telling them to talk to me because at the moment I don't feel like I'm in the right headspace to talk to someone, I just feel so alone" I whisper and tears start to form rivers on my cheeks
"My mum and dad are gone, my brother doesn't talk to me, none of my friends talk to me, I'm so fucking alone right now....and I just want my mum" I murmur and break down turning away from my phone
I wipe the tears away and look at the phone. Hundreds of comments flood through a second saying everything will be okay and to not cry.
"I don't wanna be here anymore but who cares anyway? No one talks to me so what difference would it make if I was gone" I look at my hands and then at the screen
"So this is bye I guess" I smile tightly and end the live stream
My phone starts to blow up with messages from my friends and even Corbyn starts to call me.
"ALEXIS OPEN THE FUCKING DOOR" his fist hits my door sending shivers down my spine
I look around my room and run into the bathroom grabbing the pills for my depression. I try to open the lid but due to not eating my weak muscles struggle. My door bursts open and Corbyn runs in trying to grab the container of pills in my hands
"NO STOP!" I yell but he fights the pills out of my hand
The container explodes spitting the pills all over the ground.
"WHAT DID YOU DO!?" I scream at him but he wraps his arms around me and pulls me to his chest
I sob hysterically into his chest for hours and everyone runs into my bathroom tears on their cheeks and phones in their hands.
"Alexis" Adalyn sobs rushing forward and hugging me tightly
My livestream had rapidly spread and everyone knew. Thousands of accounts have posted my live in edits or just to say their prayers for me. A tag called #prayforAlexis was trending on twitter and videos had been made all over YouTube. Many "news" account had posted saying I killed myself after the livestream but were taken down after Adalyn threatened to sue them or call the police. Corbyn hasn't left my side and Harry has been strapped to my hip since he got home. Corbyn wants me to go to a hospital but I refuse saying they will just give me more pills or send me to a mental institution.
"A 18 year old YouTube and Instagram star by the name of Alexis Faith has recently live steamed a suicidal moment after saying she didn't want to be here anymore then proceeded to say no one would care if she was gone. She has yet to comment after she ended the live stream abruptly but more to come later in the day"
The whole paragraph continues to echo through the house and everyone goes quiet.
"I think you need to let your followers know you aren't dead Alexis" Adalyn murmurs passing me my phone
I nod and find a photo to post.

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