Almost Everything | on hold

21 | The Past Comes Knocking on His Door

[21 | The Past Comes Knocking on His Door]

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Theodore is driving Isla back home from The Golden Spoon, the air around them intense with the things tonight revealed. His heart is still hammering against his chest, and his ears are still ringing from the sheer adrenaline.

He doesn't know what to make of this, he doesn't know what or how to feel.

Ever since they've gotten in the car, Isla has buckled herself in her seat and turned to the window, gazing at the moving cars and never once giving him a glance. It makes him anxious, not seeing her eyes. Not know how she's feeling. He can't even begin to imagine how many times she's had to tell this story and how it will never hurt less every time she recalls it.

So he settles for sending her a look every once in a while, or tapping the car wheel with his fingers, sometimes even biting his nails - an old habit that he hasn't done for years now. He wants to reach over and hold her hand, tell her he's here for her. Or maybe just hold her hand just for the sake of holding it. He just wants to do something to help her feel more at ease but he doesn't know what he can do. He doesn't know what to do with himself because his limps don't feel like his own and his eyes are threatening to well up in frustration at any give moment.

Eventually Theodore turns on the radio and switches to a channel that he knows plays soft jazz songs at this time of the night. He puts the music very quietly at first, seeking Isla's reaction to decide whether to keep it on or turn it off. But once he sees Isla turn her head in curiosity and tap her foot to the slow rhythm, Theodore's smile grows more and he turns up the volume.

The music surrounds the car softly, gently. Wrapping them both in a trance. It's the perfect thing that they needed to put back some familiarity in their lives after what has just been said. Once more, he starts to ease into himself when he hears her humming and slight foot tapping. It's funny, how his mood depends on her aura. It makes him think of her like the sun and he like a planet, always orbiting around her and affected by her existence.

He doesn't mind it at all. Not even one bit.

Soon enough, they've reached Isla's house and Theodore has stopped the car in the driveway. At first, he doesn't turn the engine off, fearing that when he does so the calm serenity they've found will be shattered and she'll be forced to leave. But she doesn't make any move to get out of the car, so he musters up the courage for what he's about to do and unbuckles his seatbelt.

The he turns down the sound of music until it's reduced to a soft background hum. When Isla doesn't make a move to unbuckle her seatbelt too, Theodore reaches over and does it himself, noticing how she takes in a deep breath when he leans over her frame.