Too Good At Goodbye's

e i g h t e e n

"I could lose my heart tonight,

if you don't turn and walk away,

'cause the way I feel I might,

lose control and let you stay..."

- I Could Fall In Love {Selena}

Zac

WHAT ON the name of earth, had made me think that inviting Maddie over to sleep at my place, was a good idea?

Because let me tell you, it was probably one of the biggest mistakes I'd ever done.

I didn't hate her, it was quite the opposite, actually. And there was the problem; I couldn't like her, even if I wanted to.

None of this was her fault, since I had been the one who came up with this insensible plan in the first place. When she had agreed though, my brain was screaming to take it back, because in the end, this so called "pact", would ruin us both.

But selfishly, my heart had wanted her to say yes, just so I could have an excuse to be next to her, to have her let me in. I knew there were secrets she kept hidden, and I wasn't one to talk; for I wasn't an open book either.

I was in bed, or rather, laying on it. The storm outside had worsened, and I wasn't lying when I had told Maddie I used to be afraid, because that really was my only fear.

And it still was.

I sighed and walked over to the window, drawing the curtain back a little, getting a small glimpse of the rain falling aimlessly against the window. There was something oddly soothing about watching the small drops roll down the glass, somehow feeling as if all your problems vanished with one look at the tiny water droplets.

I hadn't expected Maddie to agree with my brainless plan, I'd actually thought she'd fight me on it. Although, when she had agreed, it caught me by surprise, and I couldn't help but wonder what had convinced her to.

How was this going to fall through without one of falling? I should've listened to my gut feeling, telling me it was a horrible idea, and it would only tear apart the indescribable relationship we had established, sort of.

This wasn't some romantic cliche, where it was all 'love at first sight'. Well, I guess part of it was, minus the love part.

Love was strictly off limits, due to the contract, and the fact that she deserved someone better than me, for more reasons than one. It was all in the past though, and as much as I tried to push it away, it came back like a roach that couldn't be squashed.

She saw the good in people, she was the good, and I didn't want to uproot her from the kind, and nurturing nature she had inside of her.

Rubbing my temples, I walked back to the bed that stood upright in the middle of the room, and sat on the edge. Thinking only made my head hurt more, but the thoughts were consuming, it was hard to stop thinking.

I don't regret my actions, not at all. I don't regret letting her stay here tonight, nor do I regret asking her in the first place. She had told me storms scared her, and I couldn't possibly leave her all alone in that gigantic house alone.

At least this way, she had me if she needed anything.

The door behind me creaked open slightly, and I turned to the door frame to see what the noise was. Maddie came in through the door, holding a pillow tight to her chest, as her feet pattered on the wood floor.

She made her way over to the bed and climbed to the center, setting the pillow down. I raised an amused brow at her as she let out a small yawn, and stretched out over the comforter.

"Couldn't sleep?" I asked, already knowing the answer.

She nodded and patted the spot beside her. "The storm got worse," she said quietly as I got in next to her, making sure to leave a good space between the 2 of us.

I nodded in agreement, and watched as her eyebrows had a little crease in the middle, and how her hand fitted over her lips when she covered her yawns. My little staring faze ended when she turned over to my side and looked over my face, my eyes flitting to her lips, briefly.

"Do you ever wear a shirt when you go to sleep?" she questioned, while I just stared. I thought about it, which was sad, considering I didn't even know if I wore a shirt to bed. I was wearing one at the moment, but instead of answering her question, I decided to make this interesting.

"If you just want to see me shirtless, hazel, all you have to do is -" I began, but got interrupted when she squealed and pressed her hands to her ears, blocking me out. I chuckled at her curled up figure, and shook my head as I gently pried her hands from her ears. 

"You're a perverted imbecile," she said with seriousness, which made me smile even wider. Man, I loved when she insulted me.

"Take a picture bud, I'm sure it'll last longer," she said dryly, as I realized I zoned out, "oh, and by the way, you got a little drool right there..."she trailed off, as her hand zoned in on my face. I reached to my lips to wipe off any drool I might've had, only to conclude that she had lied, and I fell for it.

I ruffled her hair as she tried to push my hands away, but gave up when I hadn't stopped. Eventually, and to my dismay, I stopped and made sure the pillows were all propped and neat. Her head rolled over slightly, and I tucked the covers around her small frame, turning over softly so I wouldn't wake her.

"Night, hazel," I whispered for the second time tonight, and she let out a small noise in return, followed by a sniffle. Then, she fell asleep, and I rolled over so I was facing the window.

Lord knows, if I was facing her, there's no way I'd be sleeping anytime soon. A small smile crept onto my face, and I found myself praying this dream would never end.

Because a dream was all it could ever be.

a/n: hi my amazing readers!

this is, sadly, a small lil filler, and i really am sorry i couldn't give y'all a full, lengthy chapter. but, the next one is definitely gonna be long! 

so enjoy this small chapter, full of lovey-dovey zac n maddie moments (;

school update: the school rep is totally ruined, all due to homework! if school's could maybe, possibly cut out all need for homework, i'd be one happy camper!

but i guess we don't always get what we want, huh?

anyways, stay safe you guys! remember, you are beautiful, kind, smart, and worthy! ALL OF YOU.

love, elizabeth (: