Envie De Voyager

Writer Blues #1- Suabara For A Day

Yep, there's a new section of this book. Unlike the Freewriting Sections which showcase random pieces I've written, these "Writer Blues" chapters will be more on the behind-the-scenes.

So, I was invited to a formal party, the recent weekend. When I got the call, I was thinking of what exactly to do for the next chapter of Suabara's story. Then it hit me—I could try to perfect Suabara by portraying him. With Suabara being an affluent member of society, he had been included in many a formal party. Including the one that "took his life".

Clad in an all-black wardrobe, I already felt the Suabara vibes wash over me. Not even the inner clothing was white—it was really all black. The only splash of colour was a red rose that I inserted on the chest pocket, which I had acquired before going to the place. While I'm not as pale as Suabara and I lacked his outrageous "Tako Hair",  I did quite a good job of looking the part, if I do say so myself. I didn't have the scent that I felt would be best for Suabara, but superficially, I passed the Suabara Test.

Upon entering the area, I found out that I recognised some of the people inside. They were daughters and sons of my father's friends, only some of them really knowing me. Despite not knowing them very well, I knew their parents well, and the grown-ups were actually the first to approach me.

I once got into Suabara and kept a positive face while trying to keep a sense of charisma—which was incredibly hard since my face and voice are quite used to being stern or serious, usually lacking in expression. But as I wanted to really get in touch with my inner Suabara, I kept face. I then realised that despite being the type of person who prefers to be alone and in a quiet place, Suabara was incredibly good at mingling with others. He was naturally amiable and pleasant to talk to, expressive when needed, yet not over-enthusiastic. He was not the type to look for someone to talk to, but when someone talked to him, he was quite a good talker. An almost alluring way with words that reflects refinement, but also holds a sense of idealism and little bit of energy.

After an exhausting talk about recent achievements that their children had gotten, I got to actually talk to their children. Cassandra, Liz, and Jeanne. Hans and Drake. The first three I knew in a way that was a little above acquaintanceship, the latter two I hadn't quite had time to get along with. So in a very Suabara-like way, I emphasised childhood events—similar to how he talked to Natsumi about Kanata. This talk did not last very long, for I then left to talk to the party's host.

A grand celebration for the debut of a friend. After finding her, I excused myself and asked if I could leave and get to another meeting. I had already informed her beforehand about it, and though she likely wanted me to stay and enjoy a little bit more, she was well aware that I was not the type to enjoy too much fragility around me. With her permission, I ran over to leave the main area, finding a green lawn.

Waiting for me was the host's older brother, who I was really looking for. We had an agreement, and he accepted. A challenge. While I had wanted to test my mettle against him for some time already, I hadn't really had the time to talk to him much. I figured that during his sister's debut, he would be around—but not in the party, because he had the habit of celebrating privately with his sister after her grandiose parties.

I changed to clothing befitting football. My trial as Suabara would definitely not be complete without football, I mean. It's the core of his being, and I enjoy the sport just like him.

Furthermore, it was a chance to once again see for myself the very inspiration behind Kiba's personality, and Suabara's football style.

A competition of football then occurred. A skilled midfielder, who was capable of taking free kicks from virtually anywhere in the quarter of the field close to the goal. One with dribbling that usually made me wish that he would just trip, and control over the ball that always managed to get past me. Being a defender, I was there to give him a great challenge, and force him to pull out all the aces up his sleeve.

After what seemed to be an hour of relentless pursuing, kicking, and shoving, both of us yielded. He was a little too fast for Suabara's current state in Evanescence, but my mind easily pictured a hundred scenes with Suabara doing the same. I had reconnected with Suabara's core, and as my heart pounded on my chest, I felt what Suabara must feel after doing just a little bit of football—exhaustion. His body was still not used to the extreme football showcased in Inazuma Eleven.

And that's it.

That day, I learned more about Suabara, how different we are, yet how he reflects a part of myself that I can be. At least, for some time.