Forgive Me --The Fosters--

1.3 / It hurts

Callie

I wasn't hungry and I hated how Stef piled my plate with this food. I played with my food while everybody else talked. Rita left so I am struck, I haven't spoken but I see the looks Stef and Lena are giving each other. I watched as one by one everybody leaves then left me with them. "Callie, you haven't eaten anything." Lena stated and I ignored her as I looked away and I heard them sigh.

"I can show you your room?" Stef whispered and I looked at her. She looked hopeful but it sucks to be her.

"Lena can." I whispered angrily and Lena stood up.

"I can." I saw Lena pat Stef's hand and then she guided me upstairs to a room. "I hope you like it. We really didn't know what you would like so we just stuck with small but cosy."

"It's fine. I just want to be on my own if that is okay?" I whispered and Lena sighed but nodded her head.

"Okay but are you sure-"

"Just leave. Please." I said in a annoyed tone as I turn my back on her. I heard Lena sigh then a door close then I was left by myself with thoughts of running off and disappearing from everything.

Stef

I watched as Lena guided Callie upstairs and I sighed as I took a sip of my water. Is this going to last forever with Callie hating me? I needed a second chance to prove my unconditional love towards her and I can't keep living like this. Lena came down and brought me into a hug. "Everything will be okay." I burst into tears and Lena took me to sit on the lounge. "It will be okay." I nodded as she rubbed circles around my back.

"Me crying, god." I said as I wiped my eyes as Lena watched sadly. "I should be strong." I whispered and Lena shook her head.

"You are allowed to cry." Lena said with a small smile. "Us, parents do deserve to let it all out. We can't keep it in and pretend to be okay when we are not okay." She brought me into a hug and I smiled at her.

"Thanks, love!" I said as I took her scent in. 

"You are welcome. Now, we need to check on everybody and go to bed." Lena said as we stood up. I nodded and checked on Jude and Jesus first.

-

"Second last." I whispered as we looked in and saw Brandon smashing his keyboards hard making emotional sounds. We stood there for a while letting him play then he stopped and burst into tears. "Brandon." Lena cooed as she walked over and sat next to him bringing him into a side hug.

"Callie hates me!" He said as tears rolled down his eyes. I stood there watching him cry into my wifes' arms. "Why is she angry at me when our own mother left her? I was just as hopeless and innocent as she was."

"I don't know, B." Lena whispered and I sighed then Brandon turned around.

"Get out." Brandon ordered and I shook my head.

 No." I replied softly as I walked over to him. "I can't leave you like this tonight. I need to make everything better for you."

"I don't want you. and you can't make this better." Brandon said then looked at Lena. "I just want my Mama." I looked at Lena who shrugged. I can't believe this, I was losing my son and daughter, and all she does is shrug like it wasn't anything.

"I am not a toy, Brandon. I am your mother and you aren't allowed to drop me when you think you don't need me. It is my job to take care of you. It is my job to be your mother. I will always be your mother." I said in a stern tone as I narrowed my eyes at him.

"Callie isn't a toy. She is your daughter and you can't just dump her when you can't afford to keep her. You have to try to get over the struggles because FAMILY comes first before anything. That is what you taught me but it wasn't in your case. I guess, and yes, it is your job to be a mother but you didn't think that 13 years ago, did you? You quit doing your job for Callie but why did you keep it for me? I just don't understand and I am not ready to talk to you. So, get out!" He pointed to the door and I walked out in tears then ran to my room. I climbed into bed and got my doona, lied on my side facing away from Lena's side. I was furious at her.

Lena

I couldn't help but shrug then I saw the hurt in Stef's eyes and it broke my heart a little. After the screaming match, Brandon looked down at me. "Can I please go to sleep?" I nodded as I got up and brought him into a hug.

"I love you." I whispered as I ruffled his hair. 

"I love you too." He answered back as he walked over to his bed and tucked himself in then I left as I shut the lights off which left his lamp to turn off for himself. I walked down the corridor to Callie's room. The door was slightly opened and I saw her sleeping on the bed so I walked in then tucked her in. I turned the lap off and kissed her forehead which made her face scrunched a little but when back to normal. 

"I love you." I whispered. I love her like my own daughter. She was so much like Stef that it was crazy. You would know they were daughter and mother. I walked out and turned the light off, leaving the door slightly open for her. I then walked back to our room where I heard soft cries from Stef. I turned the light off and went on my side. I tried to get her to roll over but she didn't. "I am sorry." I whispered and she didn't reply. "I love you?" I said like it was a question but she didn't answer so I sighed and rolled to my side facing away from her. I then felt Stef turned around which made me turn around.

"I am sorry." Stef whispered and I nodded. "It hurts and I can't stand it. I can't get through this because I don't think I am that strong."

"You have me and you don't need to be strong. We will get through this as a family. I promise!" I stated softly and Stef closed her eyes with a nod.

"I love you." She whispered softly and I kissed her nose.

"I love you too."

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