Y/N's POV
2 weeks later.
I haven't left my bedroom ever since that incident.
I felt so naked.
She now knew I was... I don't know, Gay?
Am I gay?
I mean, I have feeling for... her but- I don't know.
And she also knows I love her, but love her more than she apparently loves me.
I know I can't just make her have those feelings for me but the way she said she just didn't care, I guess I see the two ways she could've meant it.
She could mean she doesn't care as in; it won't change the way she looks at me or feels about me.
Or, she doesn't care that I love her that way and she'll just ignore me and my feelings.
But it's always about her.
She doesn't care.
But I do.
"Y/N?" My Dad knocks from the other side of the door.
"What?" I sniffle, wiping away the on going tears from my cheeks.
"You have a guest." He informs me before Demi opens the door.
I groan and pull my blanket over my head.
"Go away Demi." I tell her.
"Listen, Y/N, I'm re-"
"I don't care, please respect my needs for once and leave." I whimper, my heart aching.
This could've been avoided if it wasn't for my stupid heart with my stupid feelings.
"But I really need to speak to you!" She exclaims.
"And I really need you to fucking leave!" I groan, sitting up.
She gasps, looking at my red, swollen face full of tears.
"Y/N..." She whispers.
"Don't. Please, just leave." I plead, looking down at my scratched hands.
"No."
"No?"
"No, I'm not leaving you." She states, throwing her bag on the floor and taking her leggings off, leaving her in her band t-shirt.
"What- what are you doing?" I ask, looking away from her.
"Being here for my best friend."
Okay.
Rub it in my face.
I'm in the friend zone.
"Bu-"
"Y/N! Things could be normal but you're making everything so- I don't know, uncomfortable! I know you have feelings for me but that doesn't mean you have to change the way you act around me! We used to watch movies in just our underwear, take showers together with our panties on and nothing else, things don't have to change!" She snaps.
"You're kidding me." I whisper in disbelief. "Please tell me you're joking." I beg, looking her in the eyes with tears flooding mine.
"Wha-"
"You're telling me I should just act fine around you, like I'm not hurting because you're uncomfortable? Don't you understand I fucking love you?! And it hurts me more than anything in the world I can't be more than your best friend because I respect your feelings and thoughts. Why can't you do that for me? All I ever fucking did was be there for you! When you'd cry because your family was being shitty or when you were getting bullied in middle school because of your weight, or when you couldn't stop drinking alcohol, I was there damn it! I helped you with my whole fucking heart and you disrespect me and my needs? The one time I need you to do something? Get your head out of your ass and stop thinking about yourself for one damn second, that's all I'm asking for you to do. I need time. I need space. I love you but you don't love me the same and I just need to process things, okay?" I breath heavily at my confession as Demi stands there stunned at my outburst.
"You really think that?"
"Huh?"
"That I need to get my head out of my ass."
"Is that all you've heard from what I just said?! God, Demi! Just get the fuck out!" I scream, bursting into sobs.
Why did I have to fall in love with her?
With my best friend?
"I'm sorry." She whispers, grabbing her leggings and bag off of the floor and running out of my room.
I scream into my blanket, kicking my legs like a toddler.
Fuck my heart.
Literally fuck it.
Why does everything have to hurt so much?
I just want everything to go back to normal when Demi and I would cuddle and gossip together, peck each other's cheeks in a joking manner, just be close to each other, inseparable.
You know, people say you have to love yourself before you love someone else but what if that someone else is already in love with themselves?
—😈•••😈—
So many people asked for part 2 so here it is!
I'm sorry it's so short but I wasn't sure what to do.
I'm republishing this because I don't think it showed up for some people so yeah haha.
Send requests!
