Be With me so Happily

Chapter 18.

Mia~

“You’re worthless"  "Why are you still here?" "I never loved you, none of us did." "I hate you.”

Those words are the reason I woke up tonight, tears streaming down my face and gasping for breath. I felt Lou stir behind me and I tried my hardest to be quiet, but it didn’t work because next thing I knew

“Mia? Are you awake?!” all I could do was nod. “Babygirl, what’s wrong?” I shook my head, signaling I didn’t want to talk about it. He quickly noticed I was crying and sat up in bed, pulling me up with him. He pulled me so I was sitting sideways on his lap with my face buried in his neck, bawling.

“Baby, can you calm down?” it took me a few minutes, but my breathing evened out, I was still crying, but I could breathe again.

“Can you tell me what happened?” I tried, I tried so hard to speak but all that came out was broken words

“Worth-worthless, Hate me,” I started sobbing again. “They- they hate me Lou. Why?”

“Who hates you baby?” he questioned, stroking his hands through my sleep-tangled hair.

“My m-mom and step-dad; what did I do Lou?” I questioned him, breathing regularly, yet again.

“Oh, Mia. Come here.” He lay down again, and pulled me on top of his chest, my face still buried in his neck.  “Listen to me, okay?” he waited for a response before he continued

I nodded and he kept talking “You’re not worthless, do you understand me? No matter what those people told you it doesn’t matter, okay? Your dad loves you, Valerie loves you, Niall and Zayn love you, Harry, Liam and Bea love you, and most importantly I love you. You’re perfect, okay? Don’t ever believe anything you hear from those people again, they don’t matter anymore.” He kissed my head and hugged me closer to his chest. “You didn’t deserve they threw at you, you did not deserve to take the backlash of their drunken rages, you are the most loving and caring person ever. I still don’t see how she birthed you.” We both laughed at that. “Hey, promise me something?” I nodded, not even thinking about it.

“Don’t ever believe what any of them say to you, ever again. They’re the worthless ones, alcohol and themselves are the only thing that matter to them, but you’ve got another family that loves you unconditionally. Promise me, okay?” I nodded, “No, I want to hear you day it.”

“I promise you babe.” he smiled looking down at me; I leaned down to press a kiss to his neck.

“Are you okay now baby?” I nodded, not wanting to worry him. In all honesty, I probably won’t go back to sleep tonight, just simply not wanting to relive that again. “If you’re sure, let’s go back to sleep, okay?”

“Yeah, let me go get a glass of water though?” he nodded,

“Hurry back!” I laughed and climbed off the bed, grabbing my phone so I didn’t have to turn on all the lights. I filled a cup with water and ice and slowly walked back to Louis’ room. I downed some of the water and crawled back into bed, facing Lou and hiding my face in his chest.

“Alright babe?” I heard him ask, you could tell how close he was to being asleep. I nodded, so he could feel it. “Good, night baby. I love you.”

I hummed in response “I love you.” I replied, just before he started snoring. My mind started to wander to random things, Liam’s birthday coming up, Toby at home, buying groceries for the house, I lay there for a good hour before I got bored staring at Lou’s ceiling.

I got out of bed and slipped on a sweatshirt, leaned down to kiss Lou’s forehead, grabbed my blanket and headed out to the back yard. It’s about 4 and the sun will be up soon so I decided to sit outside for a while. My mind, of course, started to wander again this time replaying the last week in my head. For one, I figured my dad would call me last night; he didn’t. Niall and I haven’t talked about anything, but I don’t think we need to. My mother has called and asked to meet up to talk about my high school graduation, which was two months ago now; college classes are gonna start up soon, so I’ll have that to look forward to.