EVERY BREATH

T W E N T Y - S I X

I walk into Luna's house with Elijah in arms. I hear Makenzie cry and Elijah gets scared for some reason.

"It's okay buddy she's just in a bad mood" Enzo tells him rubbing his back. Enzo was about to grab him but Elijah wouldn't let him.

"Stop! Mommy don't let him take me" Elijah screams terrified.

"He's been having nightmares. He's a bit jumpy" I say and Enzo rubs his back.

"Really, poor Elly" Enzo says sadly.

"I think it has something to to do with that day Luna's dad attacked us. He wakes up screaming saying there's guns attacking Ace and I" I say looking at my baby.

"That's horrible, he shouldn't have to suffer because of Christan. Elijah has always been a special kid to me. I've been there since he was born. I hate to know he's suffering" Enzo tells me. I can see he really does care and that makes me happy because I know I can count on him.

"The only way he gets sleep is if Ace or I hold him in our arms. He doesn't like to be near people much less have them touch him. It's strange because he's so social usually" I tell him. It's sad to see my son suffer. My heart aches seeing him cry. Enzo frowns and looks at Elijah.

"Lily" Luna says happily.

"Hey" I say giving her a small hug.

"Do you want to go outside and talk?" she offers and I look over at Elijah.

"Yeah, I'll see you later Enzo" I say waving bye as I walk away.

"Let's talk about the gender reveal details except for the gender. I have ideas I want to run through with you" she say. I can tell she's hyped for the party and I'm glad. We walk to the back and into the backyard.

"I want it to be cute and simple" I tell her and walk to the table. I hear Mackenzie giggling and turn around. She's running away from Josh.

"Look I have an album full of ideas for the party you can pick and choose what from" she says but I can't focus because I feel Josh's eyes on me.

"Elijah want to play with Mackenzie?" I ask him and he nods. I put him down and he runs to Mackenzie.

"What are you guys doing?" Josh asks sitting down next to me.

"Planning Lily's gender reveal" she says and I see Josh looks bothered. He's always been a nice guy I don't think I've ever seen him mad. "I have to go change Makenzie I'll be back" Luna says scooping her up and leaving. Elijah runs back to me when he sees Luna walking near him.

"Mommy" Elijah says putting his hands up. I grab him setting him on my lap.

"You're pregnant again?" Josh asks with a very serious voice.

"Yeah" I say with an awkward smile.

"I don't know what you see in him. You deserve better" he says and I can tell he's mad.

"Josh please don't. You don't know him he's the best man I've ever met. He treats us well. I won't let you talk him down" I tell him irritatedly. I look down at Elijah who's hugging me.

"Honestly I'm mad because I could have been the father of your son. I would have given you and still can give you a better life" he says grabbing my hand. I don't know what to say. I hate hurting peoples feelings.

"Josh stop, I wouldn't change anything because I love both Elijah and Ace. My world revolves around them and only them" I say moving my hand away.

"He doesn't appreciate you. He takes advantage of your feelings because you let him" he says. My phone lights up with a picture of James. I grab my phone and answer it.

"Hello" I say walking away with Elijah in arms.

"Where are you?" He asks worried.

"At Luna's I'm leaving right now though" I say and walk inside. I feel a hand grab my waist. Josh grabs my chin and kisses me. I drop the phone and struggle to push him off because I have Elijah in arms.

"I'll see you later" Josh says walking away. I stand there in shock and don't understand what just happened.

I walk into the house confused. I just need to go home. I go and knock on Enzo's door. Few seconds pass and he opens the door.

"Leaving already?" He asks curiously.

"Yeah I need to talk to Ace. Can you tell Luna I had to go?" I say and he nods.

"Alright then, bye" he says hugging me.

"Bye" I say and leave.

When I get to the house I grab Elijah out of the car and into go into the house. I into the living room and lay Elijah down on the couch.

"Why didn't you answer my calls? Why was Josh there? What happened" he asks furious. I walk closer to him and hug him. I don't want to talk about it. I just want his arms around me. He wraps his arm around me and kisses the top of my head. "What's wrong baby? Talk to me please" he coaxs me. I shake my head.

I don't want to talk I'm tired I haven't slept in days because of my baby. I don't mind not sleeping I care that he's suffering and I can't do anything. My baby wakes up crying and I grab him.

"Mommy!" My baby screams in desperation. When I grab him he holds me tight. I begin to cry I can't seem to hold back the tears. "Mommy don't ever leave me again" he says whipping his tears.

"I would never leave you baby" I tell him. I hold him tightly. James sits down next to me.

"You did leave me" he says sadly with a hiccup.

"No I didn't baby" I tell him holding him in my arms.

"Enzo took me and you let him" he says rubbing his eyes.

"It was to keep you safe baby. I would never hurt you. I love you" I say holding him tight.

"No mommy I want to stay with you" my baby says crying and hugs me.

"James" I say and James hugs me. I cry and feel so bad. How could he think I was leaving him he's my everything. I would never try to hurt him.