The Boys Scent ✔️

XVII - Silent Screams

As I walked into the jail, lycans stood at their places and nodded their heads to me. Of course, I nodded back. Then, I reached the two cells in which we were keeping Darius and Kaydon.

Kaydon looked up to me with eyes that seemed to be dripping sadness. Death by your own mate. Seemed to me it was a good idea. I looked to Darius who decided he'd play the quiet card. He sent a wild smirk my way and what I returned to him was something so wicked he nearly cowered in fear.

"Don't ever think you're gonna get out of this hell. You'll burn and burn until you can't burn anymore. Then, you will burn even more. The pain I will inflict onto you will paint your skin a sea of black and blue with huge spots of red. You will never escape. Because I am never leaving here either. I'm gonna spend every single day in here with you until you beg me to let you go. And only then will I leave." I looked down at their scared faces.

"Well.. I shouldn't ruin all my plans now should I? We want some of this to go untold." I growled out so loud the guards outside the jail flinched.

"Love?" Nathaniel strained while running into the jail. I snapped my head in his direction and suddenly my look softened. His face was scratched and he was shirtless, red tainting his perfect, lightly tanned skin. Gashes ran up and down his arms and his blood soaked hair hung across his eyebrow. He was injured during the fight.

I couldn't show affection now. I looked back to Kaydon and Darius, both of which were standing and staring at us. Suddenly, I didn't care. A feeling of rage and despair washed over me and I grabbed my necklace. The thin moon blade appeared in my hand and I put it through the bars towards Kaydon. "Y-you wouldn't kill-" I pulled the sword out of the bars and it dragged itself towards Nathaniel.

"Woah, Janessa put the blade down." Nathaniel defensively put his hands up.

"I'm not doing this. The sword.. it's controlling itself." I didn't want to let go. I was afraid the sword wouldn't drop, it would just go flying into Nathaniel's heart. "Babe." I looked up to Nathaniel, the sword point only a few inches away from him. "Run. Go and never come back. I don't want you to see this." I admitted.

"What do you mean? I'm not leaving you. Just put the blade down, Love." I couldn't do this. I don't have enough strength. My arms were tiring and my legs were wobbling. My heartbeat was thumping in my ears like waves of bees and I couldn't stop the sword. Why was this happening. Whywhywhywhywhy.

Why me. Ever since the first day of this school year began, my life went to hell. Meeting Samuel, purging blood until my stomach was black and blue, me choosing my mate over Nathaniel, Kaydon being my mate, Darius showing up. Also? My fake family putting me in an asylum, my real mother being the Moon Goddess, my father being a lycan, he's dead now. Finally, my old mate and my ex boyfriend putting on a war against my new pack. This has been the worst year of my entire life.

I want to leave.

I want to go home.

I wanna sleep for several years and never wake up.

"Mom.." I whispered. I opened my eyes and didn't see her. Only Nathaniel's pleading eyes.

"Let go." He whispered to me. "Let go."

"No!" I screeched. Tears were pouring down my face. No no no no no no no no no. This isn't happening. It's a dream. Wake up wake up wake up! I bit my tongue until I tasted warm, metallic blood. I opened my eyes again and nothing had changed. "Where is everyone! Get someone to help! I-I can't hold this!"

"It's okay. It's okay. Love, just drop the sword." Nathaniel spoke.

"No!" I was screaming. I lost my grip on the sword and everything was in slow motion. I opened my eyes for the last time and watched, with my mouth open wide, screaming loudly, as the sword clanged against the floor. Kaydon and Darius were snickering behind me. "Shut.. up!" I growled. They stopped.

The sword was in the ground and everything was silent. I walked towards Nathaniel and he harshly grabbed my waist and pulled me close to him. I kissed him hard, not a nice kiss, just something to show him how badly I loved him. I bet he tasted my salty tears. I ran my hand through his silky hair and smiled against the kiss. I found myself laughing. I was so happy he was alive. I loved him so so so much. And that's what I told him.

"I love you too." He replied.

I pulled away and looked down at the ground as I walked backwards. I noticed something.

"Na-" I looked up. He was standing there, pinned to the wall. "No!" I screeched. I ran at him and pulled out the sword from his chest. It was light and had no weight to it now. "Mom! Please! Help me!" I screamed out and grabbed him. He slid down the wall and I lid him in my lap. I looked up to the guards and Kaydon and Darius.

Kaydon was grasping his chest. I was sure he could feel my sadness, my pain. "Why?" He whispered out. "Why do I have to feel this? I'm sorry! Stop this!" He yelled. Darius crawled to the corner of his cage as Kaydon grasped the bars of his cage and rattled them.

I cradled Nathaniel in my lap. "Baby please. Stay with me. Please stay."

"It's okay. Stop fighting babe, it's over." He stuttered.

Tears washed down my face. There were no words to describe the pain. The pain of being drowned. Of silently screaming. No one can help. No one can hear you.

I sob and watch as he fights to stay awake. "Go get the medics!" I scream and the guards run out of the jail. "I'm sorry. This is my fault. This is all my fault."

"It's okay.. Janessa. This isn't your fault. Don't be sad. Before I die, I just wanna know.. would you have married me?" He smiles weakly.

The whole world is tuned out. I wish I could spend forever with this guy and that's exactly what I told him. "Good." He smiles. "Thank you. For making this life great. Thank you."

"No, babe. You have to stay awake. The medics will be here any minute. Come on. Stay with me."

I shake him for a while and only stop when a tear comes out of his eye. "Marry me?" He whispers. "Now."

"Now?" I cry. "Okay."

"Love, I want to tell you that even if you die today, you will live on in my heart. In everyone's heart. And I will tell everyone our story so that they can pass it on. I will love you for the rest of my time and even after. I love you so much. And those words mean so much to me." I sob.

He smiles. "I love you too."

"You may kiss the bride." I whisper, my tears falling down my cheeks still.

I lean down and touch our lips together. I never want this to end. Then, his lips fall down and I see the light fade from his gorgeous eyes. I see his skin pale, and only then do I stop my screeching. He's dead. His life is ended. I already miss him.

"I can't do this." I whisper. I can't I can't I can't I can't I can't I can't. "Stop this pain!" I scream.  Stop stop stop stop stop.

"It never stopped." I told Zane and Cash. They were both ten years old, twins. Cash was born seven seconds before Zane.

"Mom are you okay?" Zane asked me.

"No. I'll never be okay. He was my erasthai. He was my everything, my world. And I miss him so much. I'm sorry you never met your dad. He would be so proud of you guys right now. I love you guys." I told mine and Nathaniel's kids as I tucked them into bed and ruffled their both of their hair.

"Goodnight." They day in unison.

"Goodnight." I say as a silent scream develops in my throat. But I swallow it as tears fall down my face.