Book 1 in the "Unspoken Words" series. This is a short story in which every chapter is a short diary entry.
"And with that, she jumped."
~
After blowing out the candles on her birthday cake during her 17th birthday, Maya Greene takes her last breat...
My birthday party was already in full swing when midnight approached.
I put on what you could call a sexy red dress. Literally my whole back was bare while the sparkly dress reached down to a few inches above my knees. It wasn't sleeveless, but had thin strips just like bras. My skin was visible through the dress and so was my black bra. And to complete the whole stunningly sexy look, I put on red lipstick and red heels (which my feet are still extremely sore from) along with letting my long chocolate brown hair that I curled on the ends, stay loose.
I hate dressing like this. I've never felt comfortable in these types of outfits. But I just got so caught up on satisfying the people around me that I forgot what satisfied me. Now, living up to other people's expectations is easier than being myself.
Anyway
They all came. Why wouldn't they? At Evergreen High I am the school's Queen Bee. I never wanted to be her. I hate that M.G. But a part of me lost control and I ended up becoming someone - no, something I never wanted to be.
The large living room of my massive house that looked just like a huge mansion, was packed with the drunk youth. Bodies were swinging with the music and hips were moving along with the loud beat that vibrated right through them.
The music was so loud and infinite that even though the party ended three hours ago and I'm currently sitting on the rooftop, I can still hear the music linger in my ear. At least the loud, rhythmic beats.
Anyway
I liked it. The hugs, the kisses, the dancing and our laughs. All of it. I would do anything to feel the warmth of someone. Even though it was only for a brief moment, I loved that lingering warmth upon my skin.
I felt loved.
And even if it was just for a tiny moment, it was worth it. Because that particular warmth that kisses your skin can only be given from another human.
People need people.
We humans, we are odd species. Humans depend on other humans. When we're not surrounded by people, we get lonely and depressed. And humanity's biggest fear is loneliness.
I'm sorry. I'm trailing off. I just never thought writing everything I feel would be so calming. I think I like calmness.
Anyway
I do love parties though. It's kind of like heaven. You can love whoever you want to love, you can drink as much as you want and dance and be as crazy as you want to. And the best part is, nobody would remember anything when the sun will peek out of the morning sky.
I always get drunk at parties with my friends and boyfriend. You can call me the wildest party chick ever. I never miss a party. You see, I'm kind of addicted to parties, because I find comfort in them. My solace is in the chaotic laughs and talks, alcohol, dancing and loud music. I like the music really loud, because it washes out the dreadful flashbacks of him.
And I'd do anything to forget him. Even though it's just for a brief moment.
And of course, drinking helps me forget. Forget him.
However, tonight I didn't get drunk. Because I turned seventeen tonight. When I blew out the candles on my birthday cake, my countdown began. One month. I'm going to say all of my goodbyes within one month. And then I'll end this shitty excuse of a life.
Sincerely, Whatever.
*****
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