23. The Girl I Love

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October 1st, 2018

Dear whatever,

I didn't really know what to say to Owen when I found him in the history classroom. Being the only one in the room, he was collecting his books from his desk when I walked up to him.

I liked the sky blue buttoned shirt he was wearing. It complimented his green eyes and brown curls.

"Do you hate me?" I immediately asked him.

"Yeah. A lot," he had quickly replied without even looking up from his books.

"Why?" I asked quietly even though I perfectly well knew the answer. I just wanted to hear it with my own ears.

During that second, his face snapped to me and he took a huge step towards me, his breath tickling on my face as he glared at me with immense anger painted across his face.

"You and Bree pushed her down the stairs, shoved her face into the toilet, call her a cow while knowing she suffers from an eating disorder, make fun of her in public, ruin her clothes and throw vegetables at her in the cafeteria, yelling at her to get skinner in front of the whole school. You gave her anorexia. What the hell has Heaven ever done to you and Bree?"

Nothing. But I didn't answer that. I remained silent. My words were toxic. They hurt. A lot.

I am a fucking monster.

"You are a real bitch and so is that prick of a boyfriend of yours and that drama queen of a friend of yours. You guys are all shitty people. Especially you."

He said "you" in the most disgusting way possible. I don't really blame him though. I am quite disgusting.

And then he backed away. "I'd love to say more, but the girl I love needs me."

The girl I love.

His words echoed in my ears.

"See, that wasn't so hard," I whispered, quietly.

Owen's cheeks instantly flushed red as he realized what I manipulated him to blurt out.

However, his expression quickly changed back to a furious one.

"Fuck off," he shoved me aside before grabbing his books and storming out of the classroom.

"Bye, Owen," I whispered.

He loves her. He hasn't told her. She doesn't know it.

I was almost smiling. Almost.

I need to make a few things right before I end this pathetic excuse of a life.

Sincerely, whatever.

****

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