The Blackmail Dilemma

Dare Me To Confess

I stood in the middle of the park down the street from the school. My anxiety was killing me, and I couldn't stop fidgeting. What if she didn't show up? What if she didn't believe I'd deleted the evidence? My thoughts raced, and I hated it. It infuriated me because every little instance, every little nuisance, sparked an uncontrollable reaction in my anxiety prone brain. Why couldn't I be normal? I didn't understand why I was the way I was.

    I hated just about every inch of myself.

    Janessa walked towards me. From this angle, I could tell she had dark skin and large, doe-like eyes. Her lips were set in a thin, firm line. In her hand, she clutched a pink envelope. Her hair was pulled back in a single braid away from her face, exposing a thin scar on her cheek I saw as she got closer.

    "So, did you do it?"

    "Of course," I said, pulling out my phone, pulling up the 'evidence', and handing it to her.

    She stared at it for a long while. It was like her brain couldn't comprehend that I'd actually done it. I couldn't believe it myself. She finally thrust the phone back into my hand, crossing her arms over her chest. I shoved my phone in my pocket, awkwardly shifting on my feet. I couldn't believe I'd gotten this far. I was also dying to know what was in that envelope.

"You swear it's all deleted? It's not back up anywhere?" She pressed.

I shook my head, not trusting myself to speak.

"If I find out you lied, you'll regret it," she threatened before shoving the envelope into my hand.  "Enjoy. Ruin that bitch."

As she walked away, I simply watched her. I didn't really know what to do or even think. Biting my lip, I glanced down at the envelope clutched in my hand, my knuckles now white. My gaze flicked back up. Confirming she was gone, I headed back to my car. My knees felt weak. I didn't know what to do or who to turn to. Did I open it by myself? Did I tell someone? I'd already involved August. Did I want to involve someone else? Did I want to call him?

I sat in my car for a good while, just staring at the pink envelope. My mind whirled. My grip tightened. My vision tunneled in on the stupid envelope on my lap and everything shifted out of vocus.

Shoving my anxiety, my worries, and everything aside, I chucked the envelope onto the passenger seat and put the car in reverse. I sped home. It wasn't really a conscious action. One minute, I was by the park. The next, I was parked in the driveway, getting ready to head into the house.

Nelson was sitting in the kitchen eating cereal. He barely offered me a glance as I walked in. I knew what I was about to ask of him. It just felt right to include him, in a way. Everyone hated him because of what Stacie had ordered me to do. Because of me.

Because I was a fucking coward. But I wouldn't be one anymore.

I tossed the envelope onto the counter in front of him. He jumped, letting out a yelp as his spoon fell back into the bowl, which he held at chest-level. His eyes skimmed the envelope with disdain and disinterest. He slowly rolled his eyes, set down the bowl, and glanced to me.

"What's this?"

I'd thought we'd made progress, but maybe, deep down, he still hated me. Didn't everyone? "I thought I'd give you the honors of opening it."

"What is it?" He asked.

I now stood beside him, my nerves shot. I needed to know what was in that envelope. I was terrified to know what was in that envelope.

"Just open it. Please."

He slowly reached towards the counter and grabbed it. I held my breath as he tore it open, A few things fluttered out of it and onto the floor. My brother leaned down to pick them up, taking his sweet time. My heart pounded erratically in my chest as I waited.

Once he held them in his grasp, Dad walked in. Some part of him must've knew how serious this was, because he held the envelope and 'documents' in his lap, trying to stuff them under his hoodie.

"Hey, Dad!" I greeted, my voice strange and off-pitch.

He didn't seem to notice.

"Hey, kiddos."

He seemed tired. I walked over and gave him a tight hug.

"Don't overwork yourself, Dad."

"I won't," he said.

I let him go and walked back to Nelson, who had leaned back in his chair.

"I went and talked to your principal today."

Nelson started at him with wide eyes, horrified. "You what?"

Dad walked closer, leaning against the kitchen counter. He changed from a tired working parent to a concerned parent. "She said she'll try her best, son. I just don't want those kids harassing you."

My brother nodded, and I felt so guilty.

"I just don't want that to make things worse," he sighed.

Dad shook his head, walked over, and patted Nelson on the shoulder. "Just try your best to ignore them, son."

After Dad left, Nelson took the envelope and its contents back out of his pocket. Setting them on the table, he inched closer. So did I. There was a picture. It was blurred and grainy, but I could distinctly make out Stacie. She was at the school office. She was doing something on the computer. I wasn't sure what, but I knew she could be in big trouble for it. That's why she wanted me to blackmail Janessa. She didn't want the school to find out.

"Is- is that your friend, Kiley?" My brother asked.

I immediately shook my head. "She was never my friend."

"Where did you get this?"

Instead of answering, I reached for the note that had come with the picture. I held it in my shaking hands. It was written on notebook paper, and the handwriting was familiar.

Don't you dare tell anyone. Don't you fucking blackmail me, you slut. I know everything, and I can ruin you. Just one post, and your lover will be in jail for statutory rape.

Xoxo

S

    The letter gave me chills.

    "Holy shit, Kiley. What is this? What have you got involved with?" Nelson demanded.

    I shook my head, backing away from my brother. I dropped the letter like it was on fire. So, I was the only person she'd blackmailed without me having something on her? Why? Why have I been helping her hurt others just to protect herself, or to let her make herself look bigger?

    "Kiley?" He asked, softer this time. "Is this part of the reason you've been so distant?"

    I hesitantly nodded.

    Gears started turning in his brain. "You hang out with this girl, right? But she's not your friend. Ki-"

    I held up a finger to shush him. I couldn't tell him the whole truth yet, so I'd start with a small one. "She made me put that picture on your locker, Nel. Why? What did you do to her?"

    He let out a breath. "Before he died, her crush was my friend. Well, in the sense that we ran track together. I found out she liked him, and I told him. I told him she was your friend. She's hated me ever since. When she somehow found about after what I did to Kyle, she probably jumped at the chance." Suddenly, the first thing I said clicked. "Wait, why would you do that to me, Kiley?"

    Oh my gosh. She hated my brother because of him?

    "Kiley?" He seemed angry, yet worried at the same time.

    "I'm sorry," I whispered, wrapping my arms around myself. I could barely stand upright. I couldn't stop the thoughts swirling in my head.

    "I can't believe you'd do that to me!"

    "She. Made. Me," I gritted out.

    I turned and walked away, leaving him to think about how horrible I was.

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Andddd I'm back. Sort of. I'm going to try to update this book, but I'm busy with school, so we'll see.

Whatcha think?

-Sarah