Cold Flames

Chapter 19 : Recovery

I fell asleep with the smell of mint surrounding me. It felt so good to be in a bed. How long was I in there? I'm sure it wasn't long, but it felt like an eternity.... Vice's strong arms felt so comforting. Even so, I had vivid nightmares of those bastards torturing me. It just never ended....

Those mischievous smiles painted on their faces. The giggling of passing watchers on "open house" days made me sick to my stomach. The harsh stares of loathing and revulsion raced through my mind. I still remember the feel of that cryogenic metal bar they beat my stomach with. I remember the taste of liquid helium they poured over my rag-covered mouth. They strapped asbestos covered cement-balls to my hands that constantly scraped me, making me bleed. My throat still ached from the jagged ice they shoved down my throat. I threw up constantly.

As the hours went by, it seemed as though the chains only seemed to get tighter and tighter. I'm sure I've lost a significant amount of weight, considering they didn't care enough to give me decent food besides bread I got every so often. That jagged ice also helped fill my stomach up though, so at least I was hydrated. I knew that wasn't healthy, but what else did I hope to look forward too?

My neck ached in various places where that woman stuck my neck with that needle. Some icemen would just come to beat on me. But when I awoke in Vice's presence, I ignored the pain I was still very much in. I didn't need him to give me a worried expression or guilty look in his eyes. I just wanted to be with him. Was that selfish of me? It didn't seem as if it were at the time.

Goddess... that place was engraved in my head. I woke up in a sweat and screaming frantically. Vice hovered over me trying to calm me down. Once I calmed down, his voice whispered. "Are you ok?" he asked cautiously. I looked around the hotel bedroom, remembering that I was no longer in that wretched place. With a feel of something different on my hands, I noticed that my hands were bandaged. That and many other places....

He dabbed my face with a very hot rag carefully. I glanced at the clock that showed it was three in the morning. Vice put the rag down and massaged my hands. "You're shivering tremendously, and you were mumbling in your sleep with a pained look." He said unhappily.

I heard the microwave go off, so he got up and brought out a cup with steam rising out of it. He handed it to me, and I glanced in the cup. I observed cream swirl around black coffee. My eyes grew big with happiness. "Oh my Goddess, thank you!" I said elated. I drank the coffee hungrily, as Vice sat there and watched me.

I grew uncomfortable in his stare. I stopped drinking the large cup of coffee, and stared back. "What're you looking at?" I asked annoyed at his silence. "I'm just trying to make sure you're ok. I mean... you are... were in really bad shape." He said regrettably. "I just wish I had found you sooner..." he continued desolately. "Let's not talk about it. What's important now is that we are ok." I said enthusiastically. I glanced at the clock, which said that it was now three thirty a.m.

I finished the last of the coffee, and cringed at the sudden ache in my bones. My stomach turned at the sharp pain that had never subsided. Vice had noticed my cringe, and promptly laid me down back in bed. But he sat me up slightly. He wrapped me down into the blankets tightly that I couldn't move. "Vice... you're suffocating me." I said annoyed.

He looked at me angered. "Do you realize that I almost lost you?!" he shouted. My voice caught in my throat at that comment. He glared at me in the eye, and then looked away. "I can't... I can't just sit around and do nothing..." he whispered. "I couldn't even find you by myself... I had to use Fray's help. Of all people, FRAY! You don't realize how scared I was..." he continued. He turned around, and buried his head into his hands, running his fingers through his hair.

The microwave went off again. Vice got up, and took out a plate of steaming food. He sat it on the nightstand next to me. I glanced over to the plate that had steak and a bowl of chili next to it. "I'm sure you're hungry..." he said calmly. He cut up the steak in small bite sized pieces, and then stirred them into the bowl of chili. "Vice... I can't move my arms, much less my hands. How am I supposed to eat that?" I said. He looked up at me with a smile. He picked up a forkful of the food, and leaned toward my mouth. "That's cuz I'm going to be feeding you. Now open your mouth." He commanded.

I stared at him disbelievingly. I couldn't believe he was doing this. Haven't I already suffered enough? Now I have to suffer from this humiliation? "Vice, I'm not a child, I can feed myse-" before I finished what I was saying, he shoved the food in my mouth. "Chew." He commanded.

I glared at him, as he glared back. My angered flared, and I spat the food back in the bowl. Vice looked at me angrily. "Now that wasn't very lady-like, especially after I went through the trouble of making all this food for you." He said barely containing the anger in his voice. So he lifted another forkful, and brought it to my mouth. I gave him an intent look, and he held his ground. I then rolled my eyes, then bit down on the forkful of food.

I chewed it slowly, remembering that my mouth was sore from the constant torture. Then my throat ached from the jagged ice. So eating was actually very painful. I paused many times. I was sure I would start crying at some point from the pain. But once it reached my stomach, the warmth of the food, relaxed me a little. Unfortunately, Vice never looked away, probably noticing every wince my body had to offer.

He smiled at my cooperation, and continued to feed me just as fast as I could take. Once done, he reached over to grab my cup of water, which had cooled down a little, but still was fairly hot. He tilted the cup toward my mouth, and let the warm water slide down my throat.

"I prepared a bath for you, so get ready." He said nonchalantly. I nodded slowly as he removed the covers around me. I got up off the bed, and removed the last article of fabric I had on me, which were my panties. I walked to the bathroom, that was not as big as the bathroom on the yacht, but still fairly big.

I eased into the steaming hot bath, and relaxed in the steam. Vice came in with a bar of soap and two rags. "What are you doing?" I asked puzzled. "I'm going to wash you. Judging from you constant facial expressions of pain that you keep trying to hide from me, I'm assuming that you're still in pain. So I am going to take care of you." He said matter-of-factly. I tilted my head back on the bathtub in defeat, knowing I wouldn't win this battle.

So I let Vice wash me as I sat there letting the warm water further relax me. I finished washing myself after he was done with my torso, back, arms, and legs. Vice disappeared, and came back with a towel. I got up feeling even more refreshed.

He dabbed me off, and I glanced in the mirror. I stared at the horrid reflection, because I saw slashes, gashes, and scars galore. Bruises were scattered everywhere. I forced a gulp as I took in my appearance. How could Vice stand to look at me? I couldn't stand to look at myself.

I stepped closer to the mirror to get a closer look at my deformed appearance. Vice merely watched me warily. I traced my fingers along the bruises on my face. "It'll take a little while for your injuries to heal." He said sadly.

I twisted toward him with tears in my eyes. "How can you stand to look at me?!" I screamed. Vice stared at me with hurt in his eyes. I shook my head, and I buried my face in my hands, and sank to my knees. "Oh Goddess... I'm hideous..." I whispered under my breath.

I felt Vice's arms come around me, squeezing me tightly. "I'm sorry..." he whispered. "This is my entire fault..." he said barely over a whisper. He squeezed tighter, continuously muttering under his breath. I was sure he was blaming himself for what's happen to me.

I couldn't pity myself while Vice was punishing himself right in front of me. I hesitantly hugged him back, happy that he would still look at me the way he did, even though I looked as such. I tried to get up, but Vice wouldn't let go of me. I tried to look at him, but he wouldn't let me. He stayed quiet as he held his arms tightly around me. "I truly am sorry you had to experience that because of me..." he alleged gently.

He released me enough just to kiss me softly. I relished the kiss, for it wasn't the usual profound kiss he usually gave, but just a very gentle apologetic and chaste kiss.

He lifted me up, and guided me back to bed. He laid me in bed, and wrapped me up in the covers once more. He heated some more water in a cup, and had me drink it. Vice then applied some type of cream all over my injuries. He had a solemn look on his face as he stared at the injuries. Once done with that, he gave me some more hot water. "I'm going to go buy you some clothes, so I'll be gone for a little while." He said. When I gave him a bare nod, he went off. Just as he left, I remembered that I didn't give him my size. Oh geez. I hope he doesn't get something to big... or small.

As time went by, I began to remember the ring he gave me was still in my drawer at home. I missed it.... It was like a tiny piece of Vice I could carry around with me.