congratulations || jeongchan

- 7 - Wanting -

I'll play the fool instead

Jeongin scrubbed violently at his hands and his wrists, the sponge coated in soap and causing duds to fly into the air with his aggression. His skin was red and raw from the hours he'd spent bent over the sink and still the ink wouldn't come off. Because it was Chan's ink. His tiny lines had gone and the purple gel pen but that infuriating question mark remained and Jeongin just couldn't get it off no matter how hard he tried. The floor around the sink was splattered with water and suds and towels from when Jeongin had attempted to do some semblance of cleaning up.

His fingers were beginning to prune from the amount of time he'd had his hands in the water, and the water itself was stagnant and cold. All in all, Jeongin was a mess. An absolute mess. The cold water was beginning to spill over the lip of the sink and stick his jeans to his skin. He almost screamed. He was glad that he didn't.

The creak of the bathroom door opened was followed by a slight gasp as Hyunjin took in the sight before him.

"I've been calling you for the past five minutes, what the hell were you doing?"

"Alright, Dad," Jeongin mumbled dropping the sponge into the sink and turning to face Hyunjin with wet hands planted firmly on his hips.

"Seriously, Innie, what the fuck?"

"Alright! I get it!" Jeongin's voice grew slightly louder as he stared down his friend. Hyunjin sighed and took his socks off, picking his way through the wet patches on the floor to cup Jeongin's face in his hands.

"I just hate seeing you like this, bub."

The two stayed like that in silence for a while, Jeongin choking back the tears that clenched violently in his throat.

After a while, maybe it was seconds, maybe it was days, Hyunjin detached himself from the younger boy and began to scoop up the damp towels, chucking a dry one in Jeongin's direction. The younger was thankful for the fact that the elder had a level head, it meant that he didn't have to focus too hard on anything other than the unimportant things - that was how he liked it. He struggled any other way.

"Go change."

Jeongin stripped down to his vest and curled up beneath a blankie, foregoing the instruction from Hyunjin to change. That would take far too much effort. He didn't even want to think anymore, let alone about clothes.

"I thought I said change."

"Blankies are clothes, too. I thought we lived in a progressive society. God, Hyunjin, don't be so judgemental." Hyunjin cracked a smile, Jeongin's eyes having a little bit of the regular bite back in them. That was rare. 

He raised his hands in mock defence, "Okay, okay, I'm sorry." His sleeve fell down to his elbow, the black material bunching up in the crook, Jeongin thought he saw a swathe of blue on the inside of Hyunjin's forearm, but he ignored it, favouring the blanket that he was tugging closer to his body.

Hyunjin grinned, plonking himself down beside Jeongin and mumbling, "Minho apologised for early, obviously it was interlaced with some Minho-ness, but he's definitely sorry." He felt the younger tense up beside him and sighed slightly. "You can't run from him forever, Innie."

"I can most certainly try." The response was complimented with an indignant huff as Jeongin burrowed deeper into his blanket, stubbornly angling his body away from Hyunjin's. "Soulmates don't have to be friends."

"Yes, but it makes both of their lives infinitely better if they are."

Jeongin sighed and pushed his fringe out of his eyes. He looked at the threads that were coming loose on the carpet and the stain rings from coffee mugs on his side table and the stacks of books that littered his floor and sighed again. Chan was everywhere in his life. There was no escaping him.

"Bub? I gotta go." There was a deep level of concern laced in Hyunjin's voice, but Jeongin knew that it was for him. He knew he could make Hyunjin stay if he needed too. But Hyunjin didn't deserve that.

"That's fine, hyung." He was trying not to come off as ungrateful, he knew Hyunjin had other people in his life. But Jeongin hates being alone, he always needed some form of reassurance that there was someone there to look after him and make him feel safe and warm and loved and Hyunjin was that just now. No prizes for guessing who it was before him.

Jeongin didn't know why he was clutching his phone like it was a lifeline, but he was, and that meant he should probably use it. Because... he'd picked it up for some reason. It was a familiar rhythm: unlock, don't let your nails clack on the screen too loudly, seek out that one name, call, wait.

"Hello, Chan speaking." It was a clinical introduction, not what Jeongin was used to from the elder but at least it was his voice.

"Hello," his voice was little more than a whisper, and the silence that responded at the bed of the line made him unsure if Chan had heard him speaking in the first place.

"Jeongin? What are you doing?"

"I'm not sure," he was hesitant in the way that he spoke, pausing on each vowel to make it longer and cutting off the consonants to early for them to sound right, "I just... I don't know."

A/N - It's a lil short but here you go