roommates; solangelo

047

Beeping. I woke up to a steady beeping that was making my ears want to fall off and my brain to explode. I felt something in my arm and I didn't like it but I felt like I couldn't move, almost like when you don't sleep for 48 hours, then finally fall asleep, but it's only for 2, and it literally feels like dying is better than waking, except, I wanted to wake up so I could turn the fucking beeping off. Which, could represent an alarm in this bizzare simile. (is simile right? Not metaphor? idk)

I tried to open my eyes but they didn't want to. I tried to just move any part of my body that would make the waking up process any easier. The only thing that seemed to work was moving my finger, so I did.

It was my finger, then my arm, and slowly I was able to blink. I noticed immediately I had a needle in my arm, which I really did not like, I hate needles, they remind me of when I was on the streets, for reasons I think you can figure out.

I tried to pull it out, but a freckled hand stopped me. "Hey, hey, hey" A southern voice said. "I don't recommend doing that, you could like, hurt yourself," I removed my hand from my arm and looked up to see William Solace.

I sat up to the best of my abilities. I hadn't been this close to Will in forever. I was no longer wearing his sweater, which sucked, because now I was wearing this stupid ass hospital gown which was not my color considering I am so fucking pale, that I really need to not wear white.

"Will, I-" I began but he cut me off. He was sitting by my bed in a chair, just like I had done before, wearing a gray T, which he has worn before and literally made him so fucking hot I want to die.

"I'm sorry, I shouldn't have stayed, but you literally jumped in front of a gun for me, so I felt like I should make sure you were fine, and I thought that you would want me gone, but I chose the selfish thing and chose to stay, and I'm sorry, but I couldn't leave and I know I should go, I should probably just alert a nurse and not come back in, but I don't think I can do that, because,-"

"No, Will, I'm sorry," I say, my head still fuzzy, and my voice hoarse.

"Why are you sorry?" He said, "You literally jumped in front of a bullet, aimed for me, by my step-father, after... everything... you literally have no fucking reason to be sorry not to mention he's finally in jail, after everything, you shouldn't be apologizing, I should be thanking you,"

"He's really in jail?" I ask, not replying on any of the other information. He was finally locked up for everything that son of a bitch had done.

"Yes, he's in jail," Will smiled weakly. "Thank you,"

"I'd do it again," I smiled, I really wished that we could just take this as a 'we're back together' but that wasn't going to happen. Because, as I've said before, this isn't a fairy tale. This is an adult relationship.

"Will," I began. "Can I just - I want to say - I really missed you, and I am so sorry,"

Will sighed a bit, not like he was fed up with life sigh, but more of a content, 'I'm thinking' sigh. "I missed you more, and stop apologizing,"

"Will, I can't stop apologizing. Not for this," I took a shaky breath. "You were only trying to help your mother, and I broke up with you, I was weak, I wasn't there for you for that, when I've had so many low, broken moments, I've lost count,"

"It's not a competition," Will mumbled.

"That's very true, but that doesn't make up for the fact I ran-"

"I can see why you did it, you know," Will began as I sat and listened, trying not to look at the needle in my arm. "I was putting the twins to bed and my mom was at her new job, and it hit me why you did it,"