Fixing Me ~ Markiplier x Reader

I Still Hate the Shops

I look down at my food, before I attempt to awkwardly eat, I still an awkward about eating in front of people and Jack isn't here this time and won't be so I can’t even wait for him. I am in my leather jacket, band shirt again, bracelets, hair and fringe down, a black beanie and ripped skinnies. I also added some jewelry, meaning just a choker necklace again. I stand up, telling Mark I will let him have some time with Wade and Tyler, before I walk off, and Ethan decided to come with me as he wanted to hang out a little and Mark trusted him too. I smile as we walk.
"Fuck, I hate shopping." I randomly say.
"Really?" He asks and I nod.
"I know, weird but I never liked it. I get what I need and maybe a game... or two and leave."
Ethan laughs "So you game?"

We laugh at each other as we walk past a window where clothes are on display. I laugh and point to it "Oh my god, it is hot pink! I love it!!"
He chuckles, then looks concerned "What are those...?"
I look and see my wrist out of my jacket.
Shit. Whenever I enjoy myself, I fuck it up or these memories of pain get seen.
I gulp "I went and still battling my inner demons, sorry, I always forget about them and well-" I sigh, sort of ashamed.
How do I always forget them?!
Ethan just smiles and hugs me, and this time, I slightly hug back a little and he whispers "It's okay."

"I haven't done it for a bit, Mark has helped me alot along with Jack and doing youtube because I always have something to look forward too." I shrug and Ethan quickly asks for my youtube, I shyly give it to him after he kept slyly saying something about it like 'You should give me the channel name' and 'It is good, along with your youtube name which you should give to meeee!' I eventually gave in, and he cheers. I enter my thing in and he sees I am subscribed to him, and the others.
"Well, know that you have a good friend here now too and his name is Ethan." He smiles. "Now, wanna try on that shirt?"
I roll my eyes, pushing him.

We head back to everyone, I got a present for Mark, not knowing why. I just wanted to do it when I saw it, and I sit back down beside him and his friends. Ethan sitting across from me and I smile at him, nodding a thankyou. He had got that I didn't want anyone knowing, and I would tell them when I was ready and I know that I will be soon. I also had brought the thing I needed along with a game but let's not tell B/n or Mark about that yet. I feel Marks hand hold mine in his, and I smile. Finally feeling at peace.

I wanted it longer but I dont even know if thats how I wanted to lay it out, I came back and got rid of alot of it 😂
**brofists** 👊