IVORY | CARL GRIMES |
"you don't know what to believe anymore, do you? your whole life, after this, this thing has overtaken the world, you've been desperately attempting to find some sort of peace with what has happened, but you haven't, and it sca...
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— FLASHBACK —
crimson's relentless hold.
saskia's shaking fingers danced along her knee to the sound of an unknown orchestra before reverting to digging into the flesh of her skin to make her feel anything other than the pain in her mind. the sounds of the trembling air blowing past her lips nor the rattling of the door creaking behind the counter was enough to wake saskia from the trance-like state she had fallen into.
the glass she had earlier used to take on a walker left its trace on her hand with a line of blood. it ached, but she neglected to notice as she remained transfixed on what lay ahead of her. saskia had brought this on her mother. she had called out for her and after the situation had been resolved, another walker had crept up and stolen her mother's last breath.
saskia knew that she had been sitting there for a while as the walkers blood splayed across her cheek had begun to dry and crack against her face. her bottom lip trembled as she adjusted her arms around her sides tighter. the innocence of the tear that dropped from her eye was immediately tainted by the blood red of its landing.
a ghost of a word left her lips as she fumbled with her untied shoelaces. crawling over to the figure her eyes had locked themselves on an hour ago, saskia clutched her knife at her side as she slid around the dead walker bodies littering the cement flooring of the convenience store.
"mom," saskia managed in a cracked whisper, "mom," she repeated, growing more forceful, "mom! wake up! wake up!" a guttural cry escaped her mouth as she collapsed back into her spot against a sturdy wooden shelf.
eileen brown was not moving. saskia's warning had not come in time. the pool of blood accounted for the circumstances. the consistent drip of crimson rang through the youth's ears as she resorted to dropping her knife and flattening her palms against her head to make the sound cease. it did not.
she wanted to scream, but this new world could not even allow her that single outlet in fear that walkers would draw near. saskia felt the pit of her stomach deepen as she studied the rusted metal door in front of her with an empty gaze. with age, it had deteriorated. saskia felt the comparison as she stared at the ground.
a million thoughts composed the storm swirling amidst her mind. her mother was dead. no matter the broken home she had been born into, saskia had never meant to leave it that way. she sought after redemption but now, it would never be possible.
the knife was held a foot from her mother's still head. saskia's hand was shaking as she bit her cracked lip and whimpered softly, gaining the courage to end it. it would only be a matter of seconds. she had to tell herself she could do it.
"please don't make me do this," saskia whispered as she sniffled, wiping away at her face with her free hand, "p-please." she reached out tenderly and stroked back a few pieces of her mother's soft hair with a grimace before bringing the knife up to the base of eileen's skull.
